Funny thread. Started off asking about the ideal wife and evolved into a thread about the merits of hiring a housekeeper.
As for the ideal wife? Well, I think we all have our own version of ideal. What might work for me may not work for you. So again the best advice is to just be yourself and you will wind up where you are supposed to be and with the person you are supposed to be. The ideal will be realized
As for housekeepers, groundskeepers etc. My opinion is what a giant waste of money and time. I simply don't understand why so many people live to work rather than work to live. I see so many people chasing the almighty dollar in order to have more and better and then never having the time to enjoy any of it. No thanks, it takes all of about a 1/2 an hour to clean my house. Another hour to do yard work. I throw away more time typing responses on internet forums than it takes to take care of me and whatever messes I make. As far as I am concerned hiring "staff" to maintain your day to day life is just laziness and greed. Such a first world problem.
I take a lot more pride in doing something myself, stepping back and being able to say "I did that", than writing a check to have some one else do it for me.
It is easy to have that opinion when you have probably never lived outside of your own comfort zone and in a country that has all the mod cons, infrastructure, welfare state, etc etc. To also say it is a first world problem is entirely rubbish. You go to India, China, south east asia, you will find more housekeepers, gardeners, maids, drivers, nannies, home nurses that in any first world area. The question is why?
There are a variety of reasons
1. in many families both parents must work or they don't eat, there is no welfare state, public health safety net, NGOs covering for you.
2. Schools start at 7am to 2-3pm, parents are still at work, what do they come home to? A key under the front door mat?
3. People in this part of the world, do not have the kind of labour laws that protect the first world countries, so whether you are in management or on the shop floor, working hours are long, some times people only get home at 9pm or 10pm, who is going to cook and clean? Incidentally unless you are a factory worker there is no overtime either, it is an employers market, you work those hours as that is the expectation.
4. Public transport infrastructure is quite terrible, people can spend anywhere from 2-4 hours commuting every day, they do not have a wife at home keeping things in order. Both leave the house as late as 6.30 am and are only back by 9-10pm, where is the time for gardening, cleaning, etc? For example someone living in Jakarta can take 2-3 hours just to get across the city.
5. Many of the 'support staff' depend heavily on these kind of jobs. In many cases they are part of the family and stay for years, depending for financial and other support
6. For some working in countries like China it is a necessity to have a driver otherwise you will be exhausted and stressed by the time you get to the office as noone follows the laws of the road, in fact people go down the highway the wrong way or around roundabouts the wrong way.
So before you start castigating people using housekeepers etc, try and think of the bigger picture. You cannot take a first world lens and apply it to all and sundry, it is a vary narrow minded thing to do.
Finally if a wife is at home and has lots of kids, if the H can afford it why not get her some help? The H is giving some respite to his wife and providing employment to someone who obviously needs the job.
Finally if it only takes you 1.5 hours to clean and do your yard, either you have a very very small area or you are not doing a very thorough job.
In essense, stop using your view of the world and imposing it on others.
I wonder do you hold a passport?