To me marriage is big deal, its my biggest dream in life to love a single girl with my whole heart and receive love in return. I really want to spend my life with a simple girl who truely loves me and who will never cheat on me.
Well here are some things that i am looking forward in a marriage.
1. Holding the love of my life in my arms makes me feel like the most powerful person of this planet, its really relaxing and feels good.
2. Someone to occasionally or if possible regularly cook food for me, i love it when a girl cooks food for me, even if the food tastes a little bad i would love to eat it as she has put efforts to make that food for me which i really appreciate and love.
3. Holding someone in my arms while i go to sleep will really give me a sound sleep.
4. Once married, i would love to pay for everything like home, vehicle, fuels everything. i don't expect my wife to share any of the expenses, also i don't expect my wife to work too, i would love a house wife although if she wants to work then i wouldn't stop her from doing so.
5. Most important thing that i expect from my wife and most of the guys do is to never cheat on me or leave me, i would be devastated if my wife ever leaves me or cheat on me, she can keep secrets but if she has a secret affair i can never live with that.
6. Making love with her would definitely by another incentive for me, i would do me best to keep her pleased if she truly loves me, again i know i mention love love too many times but then again that's how i am i am hopeless romantic give and i am really expecting a loving wife.
7. A lifetime companion, having a good home, car or pretty much ever other comfort is worthless if you don't have someone to share it with, who better than a good wife could be a better companion to share these comforts with.
8. Would love to have children too.
P.S. i know i might have gone off topic on some points but then again, i just said pretty much everything that i want to say also sorry for my horrible English, my native language is not English.
I agree with Brighteyes ! When I read this list, you know what I was thinking.... this man has the exact same heart as my dear husband...he is old fashioned, he is a romantic, Love is what he craves in life, he is a family man, he believes strongly in the Responsibility of a MAN , and he wants to be treated with respect & love , and passion in the bedroom and a warm body to hold sure is something sweet --he sounds like a Simple Man with a HUGE heart...who has his priorities right.
And to this I say... A good woman will be very deserving of a man like you...please do not sell yourself short, make sure she is made of exactly what you are wanting here before you walk her down that aisle. Look for character, and don't marry too soon, get to know her inside and out & make sure you are compatable.
Cause YOU are a freaking Gem -at least in my eyes !
I agree with Brighteyes ! When I read this list, you know what I was thinking.... this man has the exact same heart as my dear husband...he is old fashioned, he is a romantic, Love is what he craves in life, he is a family man, he believes strongly in the Responsibility of a MAN , and he wants to be treated with respect & love , and passion in the bedroom and a warm body to hold sure is something sweet --he sounds like a Simple Man with a HUGE heart...who has his priorities right.
And to this I say... A good woman will be very deserving of a man like you...please do not sell yourself short, make sure she is made of exactly what you are wanting here before you walk her down that aisle. Look for character, and don't marry too soon, get to know her inside and out & make sure you are compatable.
Cause YOU are a freaking Gem -at least in my eyes !
And a hopeless romantic ! Very sweet!
thanks well i am simple and i like to keep my life simple as well as others, and surely i wont hurry into marriage rather i just can't get married until i am truly assured that the girl i love - loves me equally.
But your pay back will be when they both get married, have kids, you get to spoil the children rotten. Then smile and kiss everyone goodbye and say it was so nice to see you and thanks for coming to visit. Grandpa and I are off to Europe for a few weeks.
Oh I get it. My sons are awesome, they just are. They are worth every single cent we ever paid to feed them, clothe them and nurture them. What I cannot understand is a person who moans that 20% is too much or is in some way more than they should pay. 20%?!?! I would kill to only pay that. Can I sign up for that?
I agree with Brighteyes ! When I read this list, you know what I was thinking.... this man has the exact same heart as my dear husband...he is old fashioned, he is a romantic, Love is what he craves in life, he is a family man, he believes strongly in the Responsibility of a MAN , and he wants to be treated with respect & love , and passion in the bedroom and a warm body to hold sure is something sweet --he sounds like a Simple Man with a HUGE heart...who has his priorities right.
And to this I say... A good woman will be very deserving of a man like you...please do not sell yourself short, make sure she is made of exactly what you are wanting here before you walk her down that aisle. Look for character, and don't marry too soon, get to know her inside and out & make sure you are compatable.
Cause YOU are a freaking Gem -at least in my eyes !
You couldn't be more wrong if you tried. If my husband wrote that out and presented it to me, I would break down in tears and love him for the rest of our lives.
Men, read this list. Read it again and again. It IS what women want as well.
You are not every woman just like I am not every man. Some men AND women look at that list and burst out in laughter while others are touched beyond words. Each person is different.
You are not every woman just like I am not every man. Some men AND women look at that list and burst out in laughter while others are touched beyond words. Each person is different.
Three women here said it was lovely. None of us burst out laughing and no woman has come in to say the list is ridiculous. Yes, we are all different. Most women however would love that list.
Many women have men who follow that list and do not appreciate them for doing so.
Sadly Morituri, this is very common. What seems so romantic and endearing on this list seems to turn women off before very long. Yes, yes I know, not all women. But generally true. My wife is one that likes the mushy stuff like the list above. But without a healthy dose of "I am a man who's going places and I have my own stuff going on" attitude, she would soon see me as too easy. A pushover. It's human nature.
Actually I find clingy people a bit much sometimes too. You want your partner to want you because you are simply the right/best person. Not because they cannot find someone else to take them.
Sadly Morituri, this is very common. What seems so romantic and endearing on this list seems to turn women off before very long.
It also may not even turn women off, per se, but I think that it is far more common that we men who feel so strongly about these symbolic meanings marry people who are probably years away from the acceptance of other issues of the marriage, so they will just dismiss it as impractical, given the issues of the time, or we marry those who apply their efforts to resentment over past hurts instead of accepting apologies when we fail as men. There may not be enough money to make the house payment, kids who are struggling, and she thinks that they wouldn't be if I did XX, or her job is really hectic, all of which seems more important that these deep feelings he has. Many men and women can find a million and one reasons not to appreciate the simple virtues in another, even if they are great virtues.
Since I'm beginning to move away from this site, I wanted to throw in something personal. Through new approaches to medicines in treating my wife's depressive spectrum bipolar disorder, she's growing to a real appreciation of these transcendent aspects of marriage. Its like a light switch was flipped a couple of months ago. In my case, I'm glad that I decided that her struggle with appreciating these sentimental things didn't mean that I had to stop caring about them.
Since I'm beginning to move away from this site, I wanted to throw in something personal. Through new approaches to medicines in treating my wife's depressive spectrum bipolar disorder, she's growing to a real appreciation of these transcendent aspects of marriage. Its like a light switch was flipped a couple of months ago. In my case, I'm glad that I decided that her struggle with appreciating these sentimental things didn't mean that I had to stop caring about them.[/QUOTE]
I hope that this is as good of news as it sounds Halien.
By depressive spectrum bipolar do you mean that she is bipolar but tends towards the depressive end of the manic/depressive spectrum? I would be interested in what treatment you/she are having success with if you would like to share. I am often surprised out how common your wife's condition is.
I hope that this is as good of news as it sounds Halien.
By depressive spectrum bipolar do you mean that she is bipolar but tends towards the depressive end of the manic/depressive spectrum? I would be interested in what treatment you/she are having success with if you would like to share. I am often surprised out how common your wife's condition is.
Her condition is very rare, and we are told that many psychiatrists doubt the validity of the diagnosis. Her doc calls it a spectrum disorder. No highs, but very definable patterns in the lows, and anti-depressants lead to suicide in a very high percentage of patients in this type, including her. I wouldn't want to give false hope to others, though. Some of the newer medications usually taken along with anti-depressants, along with some medications usually used with ADHD have made dramatic changes in her and our son. The change was like a switch two months ago, and persistant.
I really have benefitted from the advice of others on this site, but personally need to pull away a bit. In addition to my career, I'm a writer, and it seems that my wife's positivity has started up an old, almost forgotten itch.
Sadly Morituri, this is very common. What seems so romantic and endearing on this list seems to turn women off before very long. Yes, yes I know, not all women. But generally true. My wife is one that likes the mushy stuff like the list above. But without a healthy dose of "I am a man who's going places and I have my own stuff going on" attitude, she would soon see me as too easy. A pushover. It's human nature.
Actually I find clingy people a bit much sometimes too. You want your partner to want you because you are simply the right/best person. Not because they cannot find someone else to take them.
I agree with you on these things ---very common for women to do.... they say they want the FAMILY man who treats them like a Princess...but they speak out of 2 sides of their mouth and are sexually attracted & craving the Bad boy who ignores them, even women like a little chase. A good balance between Alpha & Beta is so needed...to keep the fires burning for the woman.
Even though I LOVE the MUSH, the romantic, the emotional ....it accually makes sense for me --as I am of a secondary Melancholy tempermant - so is my husband .... BUT.....I still took him for granted for many years, he WAS too much of a "push over", too unselfish somehow , he was missing the assertive Alpha traits to get my attention & show me who was "the man" & take what was his. Admittedly I am likely more aggressive than most females , very strong willed, so he just passively let me do my thing...we were still very close ...but it could have been SO MUCH MORE.
The Clingy comment.... I want to offer a perspective (if the couple is healthy minded that is)... ..if a man or woman's top 3 love languages are Quality time / Physical touch & Words of affirmation ---they may appear to come off "Clingy" to another who doesn't have that mixture at the top..... So yeah, a disconnect, a non understanding of the other, and could be seen as too clingy, too needy.
I do not consider myself clingy at all --but I do LOVE his time, His attention, His touch and his words... I would be a pain up the living ass to an "acts of Service man" who had quality time at the bottom of his love lanugages, such a marraige would be made in hell for me, cause I want what I want. I can be a little selfish and if he wasn't into that, well, it just wouldn't be working for me.
Marry what you are -and life and marriage will flow beautifully.
ONce I got my head out of my rear end & started giving my attention & cuddling to my husband instead of my kids (which he was craving all along) - then we were both more happy and fullfilled.
I would venture to say any Hopeless Romantic type has these 3 love languages at the TOP....and make sure their is attraction or another trainwreck is coming.
If you are still on here datingopinionz....curious for you to take this test and report your Love languages , as I have my theorys in this.....
I agree with you on these things ---very common for women to do.... they say they want the FAMILY man who treats them like a Princess...but they speak out of 2 sides of their mouth and are sexually attracted & craving the Bad boy who ignores them, even women like a little chase. A good balance between Alpha & Beta is so needed...to keep the fires burning for the woman.
Even though I LOVE the MUSH, the romantic, the emotional ....it accually makes sense for me --as I am of a secondary Melancholy tempermant - so is my husband .... BUT.....I still took him for granted for many years, he WAS too much of a "push over", too unselfish somehow , he was missing the assertive Alpha traits to get my attention & show me who was "the man" & take what was his. Admittedly I am likely more aggressive than most females , very strong willed, so he just passively let me do my thing...we were still very close ...but it could have been SO MUCH MORE.
The Clingy comment.... I want to offer a perspective (if the couple is healthy minded that is)... ..if a man or woman's top 3 love languages are Quality time / Physical touch & Words of affirmation ---they may appear to come off "Clingy" to another who doesn't have that mixture at the top..... So yeah, a disconnect, a non understanding of the other, and could be seen as too clingy, too needy.
I do not consider myself clingy at all --but I do LOVE his time, His attention, His touch and his words... I would be a pain up the living ass to an "acts of Service man" who had quality time at the bottom of his love lanugages, such a marraige would be made in hell for me, cause I want what I want. I can be a little selfish and if he wasn't into that, well, it just wouldn't be working for me.
Marry what you are -and life and marriage will flow beautifully.
ONce I got my head out of my rear end & started giving my attention & cuddling to my husband instead of my kids (which he was craving all along) - then we were both more happy and fullfilled.
I would venture to say any Hopeless Romantic type has these 3 love languages at the TOP....and make sure their is attraction or another trainwreck is coming.
If you are still on here datingopinionz....curious for you to take this test and report your Love languages , as I have my theorys in this.....
Marry what you are -and life and marriage will flow beautifully
show me who was "the man" & take what was his.
Boys are socialized that the "take what is yours" is somehow evil. That drive and ambition are base male defects. It took a long time for me to unlearn that bit of nastiness.
5Likes
Re: Male Incentive for Marriage? 
