Unhappy2011

As a man, you can tell by the eyes and body language of another man who is thinking something about your woman.

Or he may just be rude and have no manners, but I would not write your suspicions off just yet.

Or he maybe averting eye contact because he is somehow intimidated by you. Maybe you look at him all angry like, whether you realize it or not?

MominMayberry

Entrophy,
My husband has a primary care doctor who is 28 and gorgeous. He has to see her often. She does a great job and takes care of him. Should I ask him to go to another doctor? Should he ask me to go to another trainer. No. Seriously?

Entropy3000

Marriage is about love and respect. Trust can be a by product. One has to take care of the marriage. Partners have to look out for each other. It is about boundaries. Blind trust is lazy and naive IMO.

I trust my wife not to put herselt in these situations and she me.

That said, what is different here is that you and your husband agree. I am only pointing the risk.

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Lon

I would go see my doctor a lot more if it were a gorgeous 28 year old woman.

sandc

What about trusting the husband? He sees a problem that his wife doesn't see and we're supposed to assume he is being jealous? Maybe he's just being insightful.

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"Don't ever let anyone ever tell you that you can't do something, even if it's you." Major Brian Shul, USAF-Ret


Thinking of having an affair? Please think again.

Acorn

In a healthy relationship, I would think you would decide whether his seeing this doctor crossed your boundaries, and he would decide if you seeing the personal trainer crossed his.

MominMayberry

Lon,
He has a condition that means he has to have his vitals checked. She is an amazing doctor and we love her. If I were to behave about her as some of the others here said, we would have fired a great doctor. The poster clearly hasn't come back and only started a post to get people to discuss. I am not refering to him. I am refering to my situation and that is that my husband has a good looking doctor and I have a good looking trainer. Why would looks be an issue? Should I have hired an ugly out of shape trainer? Should he have only gone for a male doctor? We hired the best no matter the gender. I don't understand why this matters. Makes no sense to me.

that_girl

I want Jillian Michaels. She's hot. lol.

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Jayb

It's different. The relationship between doctor and patient and PT and client. And, you both like the doctor and agree. So, the 2 situations can't be compared.

Beowulf

If your husband said he wasn't comfortable with you having a male trainer and gave you a few examples of why he felt that way would you change trainers?

WorkingOnMe

Comparing a medical doctor to a personal trainer at a gym doesn't really make any sense. A medical doctor is supposed to have a level of professionalism far above that of a PT. I mean really, I wouldn't have a problem with my wife seeing a male gyno. Although she sees a female one because she herself is not comfortable with a male.

A better comparison would be a husband seeing an attractive massage therapist. Or a wife for that matter. And in that case I think it's the same situation, if the other spouse thinks it's a problem then it's a problem.

Lon

It probably is no big deal, but there are other great doctors out there and your H's woman doc would surely have no problem finding other patients. Like Acorn suggested, if neither of you are crossing each others boundaries there is no reason to be upset.

However I was just speaking from my point of view as a man, that if I can get great customer service from two providers and one of them happens to be hot I know where I will go and why. (I even used to only one hairstylist I would always go see, she was great, even did not a bad job on my hair, when I had some).

As respectful as your H may be I guarantee the fantasy of doing something inappropriate with this doc has gone thru his mind. Most guys will never act on that, some just have integrity and wouldn't flirt or let anything escalate into such a situation but for many guys its largely because the female service provider is simply acting professionally by not acting on an ulterior motive of relentlessly trying to pursue them for sex. I'm not going to classify your H, I will assume he is the man of integrity.

However, by and large, gender most certainly matters, especially when it is a male chock full of testosterone.

Entropy3000

Doctors have assistants. Personal Trainers are not doctors.

Do doctors have a history of sleeping with their patients to the extent that personal trainers do?

If you want to see your PT like you view a doctor you may want to step back and examine those feelings.

Also consider the social status hear. A Doctore makes a very good amount of money. Very often more then their clients. Most PTs do not make more than thier married clients. Like I said this is a way for the good looking jock to have his way with the laughable guy making the money. Yes many think this way.

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MominMayberry

Jay and Beowulf,
Would I give up my trainer if my husband had an issue with him? Not sure. If my husband could show me proof of some wrongdoing then yes. If it was nothing more than jeolousness, no. I didn't ask him to give up his good looking doctor for me. She saved his life and my trainer is helping me get healthy. I can't imagine if I had asked him to give up a top doctor because I was insecure. Why should he be okay with asking me to give up a top trainer and my health? He has no issue with it at all. He has met the trainer and likes him.

joeydinap

To clarify somethings over the last year while she was training I gave her lots a crap about it and made her feel like crap! Telling me I don't listen to her & disrespect what she says. He quit the gym and she stop training with him and started going with me, then he text her and said I working at another place and she told him that she was interested then got mad at me and started again just to hurt me. And we have fought to no end