Re: Men, I want the ugly truth from you.
You have a large misconception of an EA and the primary reasons for the brain chemicals.
A man having a sexual desire for a woman is not the same thing as an EA. EA being an Emotional Affair. This is not a requirment for a man to have a sexual attraction. So when a predator is after a woman he is not in an EA. He is just looking for sex. No doubt that is true for a woman as well. Perhaps dopamine comes from this as well but the primary driver is sexual lust.
When people are in an EA they have bonded emotionally. Typically this is as friends. However, because of poor boundaries and meeting needs it can turn into an EA. This happens a lot. This is where the confused feelings are. This can eventually lead into a PA. I believe that most reasonably happy married people fall into the EA category as compared to just folks who say, WTH I am going to pick someone up tonight.
The guys in the club are not in an EA with thiese women that they pickup.
Maybe this is an ugly truth for you. Something you have trouble comprehending. That men can be emotional creatures as well. They can also be primarily motivated by sex. This latter motivation can turn into loving a woman.
So how about when tow people get married? Let's take those that marry out of love. Sometimes people are friends first and then fall in love. Sometimes it is more about sex but they date and fall in love. And all of the gray in between. So this is the mechanism. One would think that this happens with extramaritial affairs as well. That said. in a reasonably happy marriage there would be less of the just for sex mindset.
But I suspect there is a bitterness here.
Last edited by Entropy3000; 04-09-2012 at 09:22 AM.