Your essentially all suppressing something that is a huge part of your sexuality: the way you attach to your sex partner, or say, the lack thereof, and the urge for various sex partners.
Its such a crapshoot for a woman.
Its like being married to a gay guy saying: "as long as he fantasizes but doesnt act it out..."
I mean eventually the poor bloke's gonna cave
The good news is that men are mostly rational beings. Rational beings don't usually do things against their own self-interests. If a guy has a decent women, adultary is against his self-interests. A wife who neglects her husband's sexual needs is just begging for trouble. Also, a wife who trusts her husband completely with other women is asking for trouble. Women who assume they are just so wonderful that their guy never notices other women or they no longer have to make any effort to keep their man interested are asking for trouble. Also, lots of women who have been cheated on are spending months or years trying to figure out what's wrong with her and what this other woman had that she didn't. The answer might well be that nothing's wrong with her, there never was any competition. Her guy just happened to be weak or just happened to be weak on that particular occasion. Doesn't mean she's not "enough". None of us asked for a sex drive. Life would be simpler without it. We're designed the way we are because it was necessary for the survival of our species. We can control it and be great partners but nobody "wills" it completely away, no matter how gentlemanly or saintly they think they are. No woman is so hot or freaky in bed as to make their male partner go blind. You might keep him from straying but you'll never keep one from thinking or looking.
Apparently there is a growing gap between men and gentlemen.
A gentleman disciplines his thought from the time he is young, so that he rarely notices the other girl in the room. He would never imagine her naked, nor would he wonder what she looked like naked.
A gentleman listen's when anyone speaks and excuses himself if he cannot maintain interest.
A gentleman is an artist and a scholar. He makes the vision of his lover in his head his magnum opus. By discovering each beautiful quirk, desire, expression, and curve a gentleman can bring it to the forefront of his minds eye and create his masterwork that is as timeless as the magnificence and beauty of his lover.
If you believe that, I have some swamp land in Florida I want to talk to you about! The difference between a gentleman and a rogue is his actions. you can't undo biology. A gentleman definitely notices the beautiful woman in the room and yes, he does, if ever so fleetingly, wonder about what she looks like naked. And the Magnus Opus comment is right out of some romance novel.
The good news is that men are mostly rational beings. Rational beings don't usually do things against their own self-interests. If a guy has a decent women, adultary is against his self-interests. A wife who neglects her husband's sexual needs is just begging for trouble. Also, a wife who trusts her husband completely with other women is asking for trouble. Women who assume they are just so wonderful that their guy never notices other women or they no longer have to make any effort to keep their man interested are asking for trouble. Also, lots of women who have been cheated on are spending months or years trying to figure out what's wrong with her and what this other woman had that she didn't. The answer might well be that nothing's wrong with her, there never was any competition. Her guy just happened to be weak or just happened to be weak on that particular occasion. Doesn't mean she's not "enough". None of us asked for a sex drive. Life would be simpler without it. We're designed the way we are because it was necessary for the survival of our species. We can control it and be great partners but nobody "wills" it completely away, no matter how gentlemanly or saintly they think they are. No woman is so hot or freaky in bed as to make their male partner go blind. You might keep him from straying but you'll never keep one from thinking or looking.
Doesnt that smack of complete surveillance?
You say you cant trust a guy with other women but then your supposed to trust him to go to a strip club, that kind of thing.
So which one is it? (Seriously, help me out here, i need the tips)
I dont want to keep anyone from straying, I have a fulltime job and a life of my own. I would drive myslef insane with worry and probably drive him away always assuming the worst about him
Scratch the sexless thing. That will never be a problem for me, and I agree 100% taht anybody who doesnt put out in a monogamous relationship is asking for trouble.
And to a certain extent, some type of love has to exist within a man, no? I fantasize, he does, most of us do, but to a degree, he also has to have enough feelings to want to stay as opposed to being fithful because anything else would mean sh!ttin where he eats
You'er anonymous on here, and nobody's gonna scream at you for saying it.
So give us some of the ugliest truths about what women don't/should know about men.
This isn't meant to make men look bad. There are things, some things women just dont know about men. What do you wish women knew about you, that would make relationships easier?
Dont lie to us about your past or else we will think less of you for lying and it will weight heavy on the type of person you are if you choose to lie.
Dont assume we know what you are talking about all the time
Dont assume that we can sense when you are sad or upset
Dont expect us to know what is a matter unless you open up to us
Dont treat us or talk to us like your girlfriends
Yes we look at other women
Yes we think you do look fat at times but we do not want to tell you or hurt your feelings
We think you look hot when you are dirty/sweaty (at least i think its hot)
If you dont have sex with us we think you do not love us
If you are not into sex we think you do not love us
If you are not into sex and do not want to have sex often we feel rejected and it can hurt you feel like are you not good enough for her it can make you angry.
Giving us pleasure randomly is the hottest thing ever bringing us food and giving bj's. (id hope most guys return the favor to their wives)
Showing you love us. Men like this more than women think do stuff to show you love us
If you dont have sex with us we think you do not love us
If you are not into sex we think you do not love us
If you are not into sex and do not want to have sex often we feel rejected and it can hurt you feel like are you not good enough for her it can make you angry.
The good news is that men are mostly rational beings. Rational beings don't usually do things against their own self-interests. If a guy has a decent women, adultary is against his self-interests. A wife who neglects her husband's sexual needs is just begging for trouble. Also, a wife who trusts her husband completely with other women is asking for trouble. Women who assume they are just so wonderful that their guy never notices other women or they no longer have to make any effort to keep their man interested are asking for trouble. Also, lots of women who have been cheated on are spending months or years trying to figure out what's wrong with her and what this other woman had that she didn't. The answer might well be that nothing's wrong with her, there never was any competition. Her guy just happened to be weak or just happened to be weak on that particular occasion. Doesn't mean she's not "enough". None of us asked for a sex drive. Life would be simpler without it. We're designed the way we are because it was necessary for the survival of our species. We can control it and be great partners but nobody "wills" it completely away, no matter how gentlemanly or saintly they think they are. No woman is so hot or freaky in bed as to make their male partner go blind. You might keep him from straying but you'll never keep one from thinking or looking.
I may get attacked for this but i believe it to be true and science and many studies would argue with it being true.
1) Men are essentially biologically programmed to cheat ( million reasons why)
2) Men cheat far far more than women (many reasons why)
3) Women are essentially not biologically programmed to cheat (though some do) i am not denying that they do
4) Monogamy is in a woman's best interest (many reasons why)
5) Monogamy is not always in a males best interest (many reasons why)
6) A man can actually truly love a woman he is with and end up having sex with another woman or several. (Given the differences in male female brain among many others long long story short is they believe that to be possible)
7) A woman cannot truly love a man and have sex with another man or several other men. (Her brain and women's positions and roles in human history among differences in brain,sex organs and many other things) proves she cant truly love someone and separate love with sex with someone else.
Now with that said. Just because Men are biologically programmed to cheat it does not mean they have to . More so what the studies and what i have researched and read concludes that men more so than being programmed to cheat are programmed to be promiscuous and desire as many women as they can. To get as many females pregnant as they can and males can separate sex from love very easily just the thought of being inside an attractive woman gets a man crazy and his brain chemicals start to change and his track of mind differs when he is horny which is a good portion of his life. Males are not so much programmed to cheat as much as they are programmed to want other women the problem arises when you use it as an EXCUSE to cheat.
Cheating is not acceptable i do not care if you are biologically programmed to sleep around and spread your see just cause evolution and human history has wrote that path for your sex. Does not mean you have no self control and does not mean that its acceptable to cheat just cause your wife does not do ____ or does not do _____.. Above all however a marriage should be 50/50 and both should make efforts. A marriage will not last unless both people are truly in love.
I may get attacked for this but i believe it to be true and science and many studies would argue with it being true.
1) Men are essentially biologically programmed to cheat ( million reasons why)
2) Men cheat far far more than women (many reasons why)
3) Women are essentially not biologically programmed to cheat (though some do) i am not denying that they do
4) Monogamy is in a woman's best interest (many reasons why)
5) Monogamy is not always in a males best interest (many reasons why)
6) A man can actually truly love a woman he is with and end up having sex with another woman or several. (Given the differences in male female brain among many others long long story short is they believe that to be possible)
7) A woman cannot truly love a man and have sex with another man or several other men. (Her brain and women's positions and roles in human history among differences in brain,sex organs and many other things) proves she cant truly love someone and separate love with sex with someone else.
Now with that said. Just because Men are biologically programmed to cheat it does not mean they have to . More so what the studies and what i have researched and read concludes that men more so than being programmed to cheat are programmed to be promiscuous and desire as many women as they can. To get as many females pregnant as they can and males can separate sex from love very easily just the thought of being inside an attractive woman gets a man crazy and his brain chemicals start to change and his track of mind differs when he is horny which is a good portion of his life. Males are not so much programmed to cheat as much as they are programmed to want other women the problem arises when you use it as an EXCUSE to cheat.
Cheating is not acceptable i do not care if you are biologically programmed to sleep around and spread your see just cause evolution and human history has wrote that path for your sex. Does not mean you have no self control and does not mean that its acceptable to cheat just cause your wife does not do ____ or does not do _____.. Above all however a marriage should be 50/50 and both should make efforts. A marriage will not last unless both people are truly in love.
Like I already wrote:
Same could be said for gay men.
Just because they are programmed as they are doesnt mean they have to act on it.
Fact is, they all do. Because thats who they are.
How we are programmed is largely what we are.
And I know these statostics, adn facts about men. I know them all too well..
So no, I dont believe men cannot cheat. Sorry. There, i said it.
Many guys find it annoying and a waste of time some guys dislike it because they feel they are worthy of better conversation and do not want to be treated like a "friend". Me personally i do not care i love to hear my wife talk i am maybe one of the few guy's who is not bothered about hearing about her day. Maybe one day i will get annoyed with it but by and large i am happy when she wants to talk i look at her face and way her mouth moves and love her voice i am happy to have her.
However do not expect me to know about fashion or be into drama gossip. I will listen and give her answer's but i am not informed on allot of "girl" things.
Same could be said for gay men.
Just because they are programmed as they are doesnt mean they have to act on it.
Fact is, they all do. Because thats who they are.
How we are programmed is largely what we are.
And I know these statostics, adn facts about men. I know them all too well..
So no, I dont believe men cannot cheat. Sorry. There, i said it.
Wow, I am sorry for you. You are destined to live your life without a committed relationship because of this belief. I can assure you that men can and do live their lives in happy monogamous relationships. I don't know your back story but you seem pretty wounded. Good luck
and 75% of men who were served with a divorce admit to infidelity at some point ni hte marriage
the initiation of divorce might very well often be a reaction to something absolutely unacceptable in a relationship, dont you think?
Wow, I am sorry for you. You are destined to live your life without a committed relationship because of this belief. I can assure you that men can and do live their lives in happy monogamous relationships. I don't know your back story but you seem pretty wounded. Good luck
I meant it from a biological and anecdotal perspective.
And yes, I will probably never be able to have a committed relationship unless I turn lesbian. Thanks for the heads up.
Here's the ugly truth about me. I'm not going to generalize all men. This is what I would say to MY wife.
I'd prefer your p*ssy but if it's not available I would like a blow job.
Yes, it is better when you swallow.
Just because I look at another woman doesn't *necessarily* mean I want to have sex with her.
Yes, I would like to have sex with Sofia Vergara and Monica Belucci. Both at once if possible.
Yes, you really do look hot. I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it.
Here's the ugly truth about me. I'm not going to generalize all men. This is what I would say to MY wife.
I'd prefer your p*ssy but if it's not available I would like a blow job.
Yes, it is better when you swallow. Just because I look at another woman doesn't *necessarily* mean I want to have sex with her.
Yes, I would like to have sex with Sofia Vergara and Monica Belucci. Both at once if possible.
Yes, you really do look hot. I wouldn't say it if I didn't mean it.
My wife say's that's enough. :-)
Aren't you the former open relationship guy?
And yes Monica Belucci is hawt
Same could be said for gay men.
Just because they are programmed as they are doesnt mean they have to act on it.
Fact is, they all do. Because thats who they are.
How we are programmed is largely what we are.
And I know these statostics, adn facts about men. I know them all too well..
So no, I dont believe men cannot cheat. Sorry. There, i said it.
Yes i would agree with you for the most part except on the last part. Not all men cheat there are loads of guy's who do not cheat they may want to and would love to have sex with another woman or several but they do not and its typically cause they have a higher code of character and typically truly really love their wife. However like i said and like you said or agree with a man can love his wife truly love his wife and have sex with another woman. A man can separate the loving his woman and separate having sex with someone else.Sadly the truth is to many guy's cheat there are ladies who cheat but the amount of divorce cases i have seen majority have been filed by females and a huge portion ridiculous amount of time infidelity is a reason listed. When men file for divorce about 50% of the time its because they got cheated on and the other 50% of the time they either men another woman or they truly dont like their wife anymore but no talk of cheating is made.
In my opinion if you find a very mature and loving guy and i am talking a guy with a great heart he is not quick tempered no displays of selfish behavior and he truly loves you. Than you can bet (imo) on him not cheating. There are lots of guy's out there who rarely got girls or had girl trouble and you'd be surprised allot of those guy's are some of the most nicest guy's for women to date. I suspect its because they went for a while maybe their whole teenage year's with no success with ladies and than felt whenever they would get a girl they would treat her right but those guy's are tricky because they feel they only deserve a girl who is truly a good girl. Those type of guy's go for the type of girls who lets say more reserved or not the "hot girl" often the last thing those guy's want is a girl who is a former party animal or a "hot" girl. However at the same time allot of those guy's begin to resent women and want to play women just look at the very rich guy's with trophy wives and who play women most of them were nerds at one point and surely got few girls.
Look for a guy with great character. Maybe women are not so great at reading men as i thought. I personally feel i am great at reading people so i see some women file for divorce and i see the loser they married and i think to myself "how did you not expect this to happen?"
Quote:
Originally Posted by KanDo
Wow, I am sorry for you. You are destined to live your life without a committed relationship because of this belief. I can assure you that men can and do live their lives in happy monogamous relationships. I don't know your back story but you seem pretty wounded. Good luck
I see where she is coming from i do allot of divorce cases and not only that but all the evidence from psychological studies to even science proves what i said in the above post. However i differ in that while males are biologically programmed to sleep around and impregnate as many women as they can and are thus essentially in many ways biologically programmed to cheat. We still have freedom of choice of our actions and while we may be programmed to want as many women as we can and monogamy may go against or natural and biological purposes we have control and cannot cheat if we so choose to.
343Likes
Re: Men, I want the ugly truth from you. 
