Show him how thrilled you are by doing something about it rather than giving him the "yes, but"
Already trying! I've been able to eliminate a little debt so far. Every bit helps. We're a 1 1/2 income family since '08 and as CFO, I've managed to keep us going after a big pay cut.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mistys dad
Don't think in absolutes.
Instead say " I'll go with you and look, if you promise me that we won't buy until we have discussed it at home."
Ask what model he is looking at, then learn about it and the difference between it and other brands.
Discuss what a "Trip" is. Are you going to be multi-week, mega mile road warriors (I am) or are you going to be weekend in the country riders or are you going to do short hops on sunny Saturdays? Answering those questions will narrow your bike needs down and give you a better idea of cost.
You don't necessarily need to become the Biker Babe from Hell overnight (but I do wish you well) to make his dreams valid. You just need to let his enthusiasm sweep you up a little. Just by showing a true interest in what he is thinking goes a long, long way. I am a man who likes big loud toys. I love when my wife "gets it" even if she doesn't always agree.
P.S. Find some random question to hit him with that lets him know you are looking..."Hey, what kind of performance gains would we get if you installed a Mikuni 42mm Smoothbore on that?"
SAY WHAT!!!?????
He made his choice already and assured me that he wouldn't get one without us talking before. I've asked him about both of us taking the safety courses, maybe renting a bike to get the feel of a short road trip at first.
My wife's first "project" was installing a Mikuni Carburator on my second bike while I talked her through it. She was so cute for the next few weeks when she had that phrase stuck in her head.
She would see a bike and ask " Hey what kind of performance gains could we get if we installed a Mikuni 42 millimeter smoothbore on that?"
__________________ The first question should always be, "If it's that bad, why are you still there?
OK, you screwed up, it happens. Now apologize. But apologize just once. Make it loud, clear, short, to the point, and directly to those you trespassed against. Then move on.
Already trying! I've been able to eliminate a little debt so far. Every bit helps. We're a 1 1/2 income family since '08 and as CFO, I've managed to keep us going after a big pay cut.
SAY WHAT!!!?????
He made his choice already and assured me that he wouldn't get one without us talking before. I've asked him about both of us taking the safety courses, maybe renting a bike to get the feel of a short road trip at first.
Rental is around $150/day.
Safety - how to ride - courses are about $3-400.00
Japanese bikes (I know not Harley's) are very dependable and give you really good value - especially used.
You can do this.
If you're anywhere near me, I can hook you up with a fantastic used bike market. And no, they're not stolen.
Due to the crappy economy...you can find some great used deals out there....BUT buyer beware.......I would recommend going thru a dealer even for used if you inexperienced.....
And stay away from those Mikuni's....I have seen them catch fire
The local college here offers the MSF course for $130 per person. You use their bikes.
The local Harley dealer does it for like $275.00 but they limit the class size to 12 people max with 2 instructors. Then they give $100.00 credit if you buy from them. They have their own bikes as well.
The local Harley dealer here also rents and sells Triumphs. Cost is around 140 a day depending on model. That includes all the gear (helmets, rain gear etc.)
I learned "old school". Bought a bike, no idea how to ride, twenty minutes later I was on the interstate at 80mph. 6 month later, in the hospital. Good times, good times.
__________________ The first question should always be, "If it's that bad, why are you still there?
OK, you screwed up, it happens. Now apologize. But apologize just once. Make it loud, clear, short, to the point, and directly to those you trespassed against. Then move on.
Last edited by Mistys dad; 04-18-2012 at 02:24 PM.
The local college here offers the MSF course for $130 per person. You use their bikes.
The local Harley dealer does it for like $275.00 but they limit the class size to 12 people max with 2 instructors. Then they give $100.00 credit if you buy from them. They have their own bikes as well.
The local Harley dealer here also rents and sells Triumphs. Cost is around 140 a day depending on model. That includes all the gear (helmets, rain gear etc.)
I learned "old school". Bought a bike, no idea how to ride, twenty minutes later I was on the interstate at 80mph. 6 month later, in the hospital. Good times, good times.
You said the magic word! I've gotten online about renting one. Looks like it will be a challenge to find a Triumph.
__________________ The first question should always be, "If it's that bad, why are you still there?
OK, you screwed up, it happens. Now apologize. But apologize just once. Make it loud, clear, short, to the point, and directly to those you trespassed against. Then move on.
I took the course @ the local college back in 1996....I had been riding on the back since I was about 8....best thing I ever did....we were all beginners so it was comfortable...having experienced riders to ride with after the class will form good habits and skills that will protect you and keep you safe.
SAFETY GEAR...VIP!!! Don't be THAT GUY/GIRL YOU SEE IN FLIP FLOPS & SHORTS!! Save the assless chaps for IN the house, lol...
Eaglerider has locations in Dallas and Houston-Stafford.
They are a worldwide rental company and easy to deal with. They carry all kinds of bikes including Triumph. One benefit of Eaglerider is one-way rentals, very few places offer that without big bucks.
You could rent someplace and ride back to your local location and drop off there at the end of the trip.
__________________ The first question should always be, "If it's that bad, why are you still there?
OK, you screwed up, it happens. Now apologize. But apologize just once. Make it loud, clear, short, to the point, and directly to those you trespassed against. Then move on.
That's exactly what my estranged husband said after he bought a 30 foot boat....and what he said after he bought the 34 foot boat,... and the party clothes,....and the two trips to the Bahamas.... and the motorcycle,....and the Rolex watch, and.....
I think you get the picture. Hope OP isn't headed down that path.
I've never said no, I just think finances should be stable. No retirement, less than $1000 in savings and 20K in debt isn't where you want to start.
Given the above I think your H is being irresponsible. A bike’s only going to add to your problems and maybe resentment as well.
Why not have a plan to get your debt down by 50% (or to zero!!!) and then get a bike? Delayed gratification like this is immensely important in a person’s life.
But basically, as you’ve been saying, you simply cannot afford to have a bike plus it will add to your financial burden. And as you’ve probably already considered you’ll carry debt into your 50s and 60s and without any retirement money!
They reckon in the UK it’s not unusual for someone to have personal debt of $70,000 in addition to the mortgage! These things are created by those who live now, pay later as you well know.
It’s even worse there now as the interest only mortgages are coming to an end. People can’t afford the capital repayment mortgage and so are having to sell the home they’d thought they’d be in to the end. And then they find they can’t afford to pay current rental charges out of what little retirement income they have.
Eaglerider has locations in Dallas and Houston-Stafford.
They are a worldwide rental company and easy to deal with. They carry all kinds of bikes including Triumph. One benefit of Eaglerider is one-way rentals, very few places offer that without big bucks.
You could rent someplace and ride back to your local location and drop off there at the end of the trip.
888-900-9901
Have fun.
There are no Triumphs in Texas! Miami or L.A.
Quote:
Originally Posted by AFEH
Given the above I think your H is being irresponsible. A bike’s only going to add to your problems and maybe resentment as well.
Why not have a plan to get your debt down by 50% (or to zero!!!) and then get a bike? Delayed gratification like this is immensely important in a person’s life.
But basically, as you’ve been saying, you simply cannot afford to have a bike plus it will add to your financial burden. And as you’ve probably already considered you’ll carry debt into your 50s and 60s and without any retirement money!
They reckon in the UK it’s not unusual for someone to have personal debt of $70,000 in addition to the mortgage! These things are created by those who live now, pay later as you well know.
It’s even worse there now as the interest only mortgages are coming to an end. People can’t afford the capital repayment mortgage and so are having to sell the home they’d thought they’d be in to the end. And then they find they can’t afford to pay current rental charges out of what little retirement income they have.
I sincerely hope your H sees the light!
I am trying to get him to see the reality. I don't like being the buzz kill. For our kids, we chose to have me work part time. That worked for some time until everything we need to live has quadrupled in price. That's the new reality. I am finishing some classes and will look for a full time job, as the kids are older and more independent. I've already begun the process of eliminating unnecessary debt. The fact I can make some progress even with less income speaks to how close we are to being better prepared financially. It's just a matter of a little patience on both are parts.