I'm a life long motorcyclist. $1000.00 in savings at 43 is not a good situation. Decent gear costs that much. What type of bike is he looking at?
Exactly.... he wants a Thruxton. It's a beautiful (and not that expensive) bike, but we've got kids, we're "relatively" young with "some" time to put $$ away. It's just not possible for me to wrap my brain around getting a bike before we get our s**t together.
I'm facing the reality that you probably already see coming. My wife didn't work for a few years after our children were born, but gradually added hours as the years passed. Next year, college will cost us about $60k per year, since we do not want them to have debt after graduation. I also took a beating in the retirement plans during the downturn, which we've been rebuilding since.
My wife approaches finances similar to you. She's willing to sacrifice. It doesn't come to me as easily, but I think I'm okay. I wanted to take the children campling while they were young enough to enjoy it, and while we lived in a great location with a work assignment. My wife's idea of "roughing it" is Holiday Inn Express, though. So, I wanted a camper. Our agreement was to find a way to save enough monthly, or find extra income, to cover it. Also, I wanted to assure her that it wasn't just a passing phase, so I would first save enough through this plan to pay a good down payment. We bought it, used it a few years, then sold it before relocating to a new job (actually made a profit thanks to friends who really wanted it).
In a situation like this, I think it is smart to look for ways to save for it without sacrificing your long term goals.
I'm facing the reality that you probably already see coming. My wife didn't work for a few years after our children were born, but gradually added hours as the years passed. Next year, college will cost us about $60k per year, since we do not want them to have debt after graduation. I also took a beating in the retirement plans during the downturn, which we've been rebuilding since.
My wife approaches finances similar to you. She's willing to sacrifice. It doesn't come to me as easily, but I think I'm okay. I wanted to take the children campling while they were young enough to enjoy it, and while we lived in a great location with a work assignment. My wife's idea of "roughing it" is Holiday Inn Express, though. So, I wanted a camper. Our agreement was to find a way to save enough monthly, or find extra income, to cover it. Also, I wanted to assure her that it wasn't just a passing phase, so I would first save enough through this plan to pay a good down payment. We bought it, used it a few years, then sold it before relocating to a new job (actually made a profit thanks to friends who really wanted it).
In a situation like this, I think it is smart to look for ways to save for it without sacrificing your long term goals.
I guess my thing is that if there's enough motivation to save for the bike, where's that motivation to be free of needless debt? I'm not perfect, but my first thought when I have unexpected income is to get rid of some bit of debt that accumulates interest.
I guess my thing is that if there's enough motivation to save for the bike, where's that motivation to be free of needless debt? I'm not perfect, but my first thought when I have unexpected income is to get rid of some bit of debt that accumulates interest.
I agree, but you are probably the only one who can really decide if you think this is important enough to outweigh the risk.
Its really hard to convey how good it feels to eliminate debt to someone who wants a big ticket item, though.
She said in her first post that they dont have money and why is every body telling her to go for it or worse one man said if he doesnt get the bike he will go for some other woman. The man is 43 years old and she is a student and have no money. Cycles are expensive and repair and insurance to. Telling her to go for it is not smart thing. Do you have kids and savings for education? I watch a woman named Suzie Orman and she says unless you have 6 months of salary savings that any thing over $500 doesnt happen for luxury un less you have 6 months savings. You are in debt and have 1,000 in savings and he wants to spend money you dont have. That is wrong and will hurt you and family.
While I believe that a husband has the right to want something, the practical side is there too.
So, look at the following cost with him before he makes a decision.
Insurance, not only bike, but health. Many bike policies do not include personal injury. As a new rider, don't cheap on the insurance or you may find out a small accident will sideline the bike because of repair costs. Inexperienced rider insurance can be $$$. My wife costs 4 times what mine is for the same coverage.
Gear.
While I believe in personal choice when I ride, you need to decide what gear is right for you.
Helmets cost anywhere from $40.00 to $1000.00 and every range in between. Cheap helmets are just that-Cheap.
Riding gear. Leathers or textiles is your choice but decent riding gear costs large dollars. If you are OK with jeans and a Tee-shirt, that's your business. You don't dress for the ride, you dress for the accident. For two people, plan on at least $1000.00 to start.
Rain gear. Because not every day is sunny and rain always finds a way to get between you and where you are headed.
There will be tools, manuals, covers, modifications and other costs that will need to be considered as well. Those will be harder to define and will be bought "as needed".
And of course your tattoo. You certainly don't want a strip mall, carbon copy, tramp stamp. Hold out for the real artists.
__________________ The first question should always be, "If it's that bad, why are you still there?
OK, you screwed up, it happens. Now apologize. But apologize just once. Make it loud, clear, short, to the point, and directly to those you trespassed against. Then move on.
She said in her first post that they dont have money and why is every body telling her to go for it or worse one man said if he doesnt get the bike he will go for some other woman. The man is 43 years old and she is a student and have no money. Cycles are expensive and repair and insurance to. Telling her to go for it is not smart thing. Do you have kids and savings for education? I watch a woman named Suzie Orman and she says unless you have 6 months of salary savings that any thing over $500 doesnt happen for luxury un less you have 6 months savings. You are in debt and have 1,000 in savings and he wants to spend money you dont have. That is wrong and will hurt you and family.
"Everybody" is telling her to go for it?
Did you read the responces? It seems like lots of reasonable answers to a reasonable question including different work arounds on how to look at it.
__________________ The first question should always be, "If it's that bad, why are you still there?
OK, you screwed up, it happens. Now apologize. But apologize just once. Make it loud, clear, short, to the point, and directly to those you trespassed against. Then move on.
I guess my thing is that if there's enough motivation to save for the bike, where's that motivation to be free of needless debt? I'm not perfect, but my first thought when I have unexpected income is to get rid of some bit of debt that accumulates interest.
Be honest.
You keep asking these questions, but there's resentment here.
If your 43 year old husband wants to ride something new, I suggest you buy the motorcycle. It's far and away the best option you can hope for.
You sell books telling men how to act and say this? No money no future of retire and scare her with cheating to get him a cycle they dont have money for? He is 43 with no savings and no retire money but spend what they have on a cycle. Maybe they can change it to have a tent on it so that they can spend old age in it.
Did you read the responces? It seems like lots of reasonable answers to a reasonable question including different work arounds on how to look at it.
Maybe use the bike as goal for when the wife is out of school
ex. i was working on my executive mba and the wife said as a grad present i could get whatever bike i wanted so that what we did. Fast forward 4 yrs later she wants a chopper style bike and i told her as soon as she is finished getting her family practioners license or PA license she could get whatever she wanted so it works both ways
Did you read the responces? It seems like lots of reasonable answers to a reasonable question including different work arounds on how to look at it.
3 pages tell her to do it and she says her first post they dont have money. They are broke and yet go for the cycle. They need to save money and take care of bills and have money for retire. Rent a cycle for $150 hour is more then 10% of savings and people say do it. This is bad advise. Save money until you afford to have more savings and then do what you want.
*Chasing Rainbows* question for someone who posts as if they are on top of everything financially where is the retirement?
Why are you guys early 40's with no retirement?
I would say definitely do not buy a bike with 1000 bucks in the bank, 20K debt, and zero retirement.
I went back through my posts, didn't see anything other than saying that we've "managed" considering the decrease in income and skyrocketing cost of living.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MominMayberry
You sell books telling men how to act and say this? No money no future of retire and scare her with cheating to get him a cycle they dont have money for? He is 43 with no savings and no retire money but spend what they have on a cycle. Maybe they can change it to have a tent on it so that they can spend old age in it.
Regardless of wanting a motorcycle, if that's all it took for him to cheat, I'd help him pack and let the "18 year old" do his laundry. That lack of a moral compass is intrinsic in a person who would use the excuse of "my wife doesn't want me to have a bike, so I'll show her........."
Quote:
Originally Posted by Conrad
Be honest.
You keep asking these questions, but there's resentment here.
Own it.
Already have. I didn't think my resentment was obscure from my posts.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Conrad
Don't do this.
Is there a compromise?
A way he can work extra to put away designated money for this?
Absolutely. Once we've gotten to where we should be financially, like the Suze Orman concept, we can both look at what we can do to fulfill some of the wants once the needs are met.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mistys dad
And of course your tattoo. You certainly don't want a strip mall, carbon copy, tramp stamp. Hold out for the real artists.
I went back through my posts, didn't see anything other than saying that we've "managed" considering the decrease in income and skyrocketing cost of living.
Regardless of wanting a motorcycle, if that's all it took for him to cheat, I'd help him pack and let the "18 year old" do his laundry. That lack of a moral compass is intrinsic in a person who would use the excuse of "my wife doesn't want me to have a bike, so I'll show her........."
Already have. I didn't think my resentment was obscure from my posts.
Absolutely. Once we've gotten to where we should be financially, like the Suze Orman concept, we can both look at what we can do to fulfill some of the wants once the needs are met.
Exactly!
Save money and buy off what you owe. Save 6 months salary and then buy the cycle. You are smart.
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Re: 43 yr old Man, Motorcycles and Tattoos 
That lack of a moral compass is intrinsic in a person who would use the excuse of "my wife doesn't want me to have a bike, so I'll show her........."
