Hope1964

Dude, you don't KNOW if she's cheated or not. The ILYBNILWY speech is a recurring theme for cheaters. Do some reading around the CWI forum - you'll see.

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amiller

This is very nice... all the support, n opinions everyone is giving! And I know everyone can only base there opinions on what they been told! There is alot more to the story!!!! This is not an overnight thing, that has happen. And this is not the first time of this all happening! And this is not the first time, he's going to make these promises! It a cycle he does n goes thru!!! N yes this time it lasted almost 3weeks, a record!!! And if ot was outside influences, then it would have been over along tme ago! Even his family has been saying this!!! I HAVE held everything together the ENTIRE marriage!!!!! None of you have the slightest idea of everything n myself I have given!! I fell inlove at 15, have known no other! I have been the perfect mother n wife for twenty years!!! Waited on him hand n foot! To the point he didnt even know what drawer the silverware was in!!!! Then i went to work,n still came home n did everything!!!! N u really have no idea, everything!!!! It gets to a point that the fight is gone, n gotta do whats best for me n the kids!! Im tired!!!! N believe what u like, I have NEVER cheated!!!!!!!!!!

Almostrecovered

Then show him the phone records and who you've been talking to at 2am

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waiwera

I'm so sorry your hurt by what you read here and for what your going through. It must be very painful.
Yes we only (usually) ever get one side of a story and simply say how we see things (often from personal experience) and try to support the original poster.... it is so not personal.. I'm sure you know that.

The phone thing was HUGE red flag to many here who post here.. it's often one of the first signs of an affair.

I'd be very suspious of my H if he hid phone or FB or emails from me.

If you have nothing to hide them show your H your phone etc... and put this issue to bed.

It sounds like you have a lot to work on.
I wish you (both) the very best ...whatever happens.

amiller

He has seen the fone records, n I have told him who I talk too! What is not said, is that I blocked the records after he seen them, n went mad and said he was going to call everyone n threaten them not to call my fone!! Everyone, girls, guys, straight, gay..... I support n pay for everything, I will not have my friends, coworkers talked n treated like ****! I'm sorry I did not get on here to defend myself, just to show there is more to any/most stories. I have been 100% honest on my feelings to him, as hard as it is!! But now that its hit him, he sees now what he had all along!!

waiwera

I feel your anger and your frustration. I cannot imagine what it has been like for you while he's been 'in his office' all these years.

Yes all too often spouses don't realise how lucky they are until it's too late.

There is so much going on with you too...is there any chance you would go to counselling together. If only to learn how to end your marriage and cause as little heartache for all involved.
To give you a plan , a direction.

67flh

ain't no way in hell, you're gonna convince me that you're talking to friends and family till 2am.

turnera

Have you ever researched the ILYBINILWY speech? Look it up.

EleGirl

amiller's story sounds a lot like mine... except my husband spent 10 years playing video games and ignoring EVERYTHING. He's not had a job in all that time either.

I have been the sole support of all of us to include him, his 2 children, my son and my self.

I have suffered a lot of insomnia all these years because of the stress, being lonely, etc.

I have spent many a night talking to friends and family till 2am because I cannot sleep.


From my experience it's perfectly possible that amiller is talking to someone other than an EA/PA partner.

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Surviving An Affair - What Are Plan A and Plan B? 180 for Betrayed Spouses


To Create A Passionate Marriage - Five Steps to Romantic Love His Needs, Her Needs Love Busters

turnera

Are you trying to say you are his wife?

Then do us a favor and come back and repeat what you said in complete sentences so I can understand what you are saying.

waiwera

Oh give her a break. She's clearly distraught and venting.

I managed to read and understand it all.

turnera

Sorry, I refuse to deal with a professional forum like this and have to translate text-speak.

EleGirl

This is not a 'professional forum'. It's a forum of non-professionals helping each other.

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Surviving An Affair - What Are Plan A and Plan B? 180 for Betrayed Spouses


To Create A Passionate Marriage - Five Steps to Romantic Love His Needs, Her Needs Love Busters

turnera

It IS a professional forum in terms of having professional rules and regulations and expectations of adult-level expectations.

If you want less than that, go to twitter.

waiwera

Professional??

I'm a gardener... my degree is in Horticulture. Unless your a plant or a soil microbe I'm here in my amateur capacity.

What about you?

edited: Twitter? Really??

Have you no compassion for these people and remember they are real people.