09-21-2009, 02:15 PM
Join Date: Mar 2009
| | Re: Should we "act" happy?
Originally Posted by zengoddess
Mmmm...I wonder if that's true. My husband once said: "how can I have sex with you when I don't feel close to you?" That was usually after an argument. Sometimes I wonder, which of us was the woman in this relationship. Mind you he is a strong, handsome, athletic, "macho" kind of man. Very masculine. And I'm a feminine type (granted, I am much more sexual than him).
We didn't have make-up sex like most couples because of it.
Is he normal?
I don't doubt for one minute that the majority of husbands/wives feel that way:
Husbands: I need to have sex in order to feel close to you.
Wives: I need to feel close to you in order to have sex with you.
The book "The 6 Secrets of a Lasting Relationship" uses the acronymn CREATE (Chemistry, Respect, Enjoyment, Acceptance, Trust, Empathy) to define the 'pillars' of a successful relationship.
The first pillar (Chemistry) touches on the sexual aspect. It talks a little about what some people refer to as "duty sex". In other words, the author recognizes that sex should be present in a relationship to (re)build strong chemistry.
I couldn't agree more.
D8zed and Confused