Artificial Insemination - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-06-2015, 08:57 PM Thread Starter
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Artificial Insemination

Could someone knowledgeable point to medical literature that could shed light on the following problem? A guy I know intercepted some communication that appeared to suggest that his child wasn't conceived when and how he thought (the timing did appear suspicious). Yet a mail-in DNA test proved his paternity. Barring sloppiness at the lab (the test was non-legal, but the same company does paternity tests for court cases), could his woman have somehow conceived artificially without his knowledge?

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post #2 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-07-2015, 07:08 AM
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Re: Artificial Insemination

...How did the timing appear suspicious?
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post #3 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-07-2015, 01:48 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Artificial Insemination

The only vaginal intercourse they had in the course of a couple of months was weeks earlier than the doctor's calculated conception date (while the birth date was almost spot-on). There was also no inside ejaculation, and withdrawal was their "contraception" method for 3 years up to that point.
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post #4 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-07-2015, 06:31 PM
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Re: Artificial Insemination

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Could someone knowledgeable point to medical literature that could shed light on the following problem? A guy I know intercepted some communication that appeared to suggest that his child wasn't conceived when and how he thought (the timing did appear suspicious). Yet a mail-in DNA test proved his paternity. Barring sloppiness at the lab (the test was non-legal, but the same company does paternity tests for court cases), could his woman have somehow conceived artificially without his knowledge?
I doubt it. You have to go to all these doctor's appointments, get shots with big needles, and the timing is all based on a woman's cycle. So she can't hide it very well because when she is close to her cycle she has to go in to have ultrasounds. It is a very complicated process and would be pretty hard to hide. What is he worried about? That this is another man's child through artificial insemination?
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post #5 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-07-2015, 06:43 PM
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Re: Artificial Insemination

Was there any kind of sexual interaction at all in which he ejaculated?

Like rubbing on the outside? What did they do?
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post #6 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-07-2015, 10:53 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Artificial Insemination

I guess he just ejaculated on her body and/or bed. We kept theorizing that sperm can survive for hours if properly stored, but that seems like quite an undertaking to accomplish through the same roof.
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post #7 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-07-2015, 10:56 PM
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Re: Artificial Insemination

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I guess he just ejaculated on her body and/or bed. We kept theorizing that sperm can survive for hours if properly stored, but that seems like quite an undertaking to accomplish through the same roof.
I got pregnant without PIV. One of my sisters did too. Just rubbing round on the outside and ejaculating can do it. Ejaculation on her then his or her hands down there can do it.

He got her pregnant. That is pretty obvious. Why is he trying to deny the pregnancy?

What is your relationship to this guy? What is his relationship to her?
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post #8 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-09-2015, 08:18 AM Thread Starter
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Re: Artificial Insemination

Sorry I'm trying to stay somewhat vague, in case she reads this forum. He is not trying to deny fatherhood at all, but the overheard communication is unequivocal in stating that the pregnancy occurred without his intent. The context of that conversation was around the timing of a second child, and her saying that she couldn't speed the process up "like last time" because he is now using condoms.
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post #9 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-11-2015, 08:46 AM
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Re: Artificial Insemination

It occurred with his consent. He was with her, he came. Actually, per-ejeculatory fluid around the entrance to the vagina can do it. Withdrawal is not an effective means of birth control and if preventing birth was important to him, he would have educated himself.

Perhaps she could have taken his ejaculate off her belly with her hand and put it in the area of her vagina. But there are no guarantees that would work any more that guaranteeing withdrawal works to prevent pregnancy.

Perhaps a vasectomy is in order now.

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In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer." - Albert Camus
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post #10 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-11-2015, 12:00 PM
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Re: Artificial Insemination

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Sorry I'm trying to stay somewhat vague, in case she reads this forum. He is not trying to deny fatherhood at all, but the overheard communication is unequivocal in stating that the pregnancy occurred without his intent. The context of that conversation was around the timing of a second child, and her saying that she couldn't speed the process up "like last time" because he is now using condoms.
Condoms do not prevent a person from using the sperm in them in the way you are suggesting she did the first time.

What is his point of all this? If he does not want a child with her, he needs to either get snipped or stop having sex with her. It's pretty simple.

Why is he even having these discussions? What is his point? To malign her? To blame her for something?

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post #11 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-11-2015, 04:15 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Artificial Insemination

All along he thought that it was pre-ejaculate that did the trick, and of course he is aware that withdrawal is hardly a method of contraception. The potential consequences were well-known and understood.

His current goal is to figure out what happened. He didn't even question that the pregnancy just happened. The new information came out the blue.

As I've stated before, the overheard communication is unequivocal that the woman took action to become pregnant. He and I are not medical professionals or biologists, so we're exceedingly curious about what could have happened. I guess we gleaned some knowledge from this thread, for which I thank the contributors.
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post #12 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-12-2015, 03:05 PM
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Re: Artificial Insemination

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All along he thought that it was pre-ejaculate that did the trick, and of course he is aware that withdrawal is hardly a method of contraception. The potential consequences were well-known and understood.

His current goal is to figure out what happened. He didn't even question that the pregnancy just happened. The new information came out the blue.

As I've stated before, the overheard communication is unequivocal that the woman took action to become pregnant. He and I are not medical professionals or biologists, so we're exceedingly curious about what could have happened. I guess we gleaned some knowledge from this thread, for which I thank the contributors.
It might be a good idea for him to start thinking of that baby and stop worrying about the exact process of how it came to be. The baby is his and is born, it sounds like, and needs him to be a good daddy. That child would be devastated if he or she did not think daddy wanted him or her. So he needs to give up worrying about it and accept that he has a child.
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post #13 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-12-2015, 03:55 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Artificial Insemination

He wasn't worried until the communication and will probably lay this to rest even if he doesn't find any definitive answer. But, for a second, imagine his state during those days before receiving the DNA report (female solidarity may be many TAMers' knee-jerk reaction, but imagine just for a second). He says the interesting thing he learned while taking care of the kid every single day and waiting for the report, clouded in uncertainty, was that he decided that even if he was not the father, he would never tell the kid and would continue to raise him. They are very close and it's not an easily broken bond.
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post #14 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-12-2015, 05:30 PM
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Re: Artificial Insemination

so, basically your "friend" wants to know if the mother of his children maybe saved up sperm from an earlier time (froze it?) and turkey basted her way into pregnancy?

To what end?

If he managed to have sexual contact with her that got his swimmers out into the air anywhere near her, then pregnancy can result.

if he was that worried about it he should not have had sexual contact.

At the very least, bleached down the whole room and made sure condoms were flushed away, etc.


Kind of an odd predicament as described.
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post #15 of 27 (permalink) Old 03-12-2015, 06:21 PM
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Re: Artificial Insemination

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The only vaginal intercourse they had in the course of a couple of months was weeks earlier than the doctor's calculated conception date (while the birth date was almost spot-on). There was also no inside ejaculation, and withdrawal was their "contraception" method for 3 years up to that point.
And as a whole herd of guys have sadly found out, the "withdrawal method" is greatly like playing Russian Roulette, with a fully loaded Lugar! More especially when they have been doing it as standard practice for three years!

From a purely physiological standpoint, just before the guy starts to reach his heralded orgasmic "point of inevitability," and then gradually slows down to a stop, in order to stall his forthcoming ejaculation(edging); well, if he's not donning "a raincoat," then some of his stuff, perhaps only as much as a drop or two, is inevitably going to seep or involuntarily squirt out right into his lady. And provided that her biological timing is just right, then the two of them stand pretty good odds that they are going to be parents! Just sayin'!

If he want's the greatly enhanced benefits of bare sex with his woman without having ton put that condom on, then he'd better give some pretty serious thought to getting snipped by his urologist. It's a simple relatively painless procedure that will quell his pregnancy fears and provide him,
as well as her, with years of pleasure and personal security!

"Been there ~ Done that!" It's no big deal!

"To love another person is to see the face of God!" - Jean Valjean from Les Miserables

My Story! http://talkaboutmarriage.com/going-t...andonment.html
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