I think my husband is manipulating me
I think my husband might be a sociopath/narcissist and is emotionally manipulating me.
He recently went on a business trip for three days. On the day he was driving back, his female co-worker posted photos online showing she was with him. He never told me he wasn't alone on the trip.
When I confronted him about it, he blew it off, saying he didn't realize he hadn't told me. I stewed on it for another few hours before saying what was really on my mind. "When you spend three days alone with another woman and hide it from me, it looks like you're having an affair."
Without apologizing or denying anything, he told me he was severely depressed and had contemplated suicide recently. When we sat down to talk about it, he faked a crying fit. I didn't let on that I knew it was fake, acting supportive. I suggested he see a therapist and he flipped out, saying that's why he didn't tell me about the depression in the first place, because he knew I'd want him to see a shrink. While this can be understandable, I believe he avoids professionals because they would see him for what he truly is.
I asked him more about what was causing the depressing and he blamed it on the marital rough patch we've been having. Saying he's trying his hardest to make me happy and to be a good husband, but it's never enough for me. He feels like he can't do anything right.
I know it may seem cold-hearted or pessimistic, but I believe this was all an act to manipulate me. What a convenient deflection to reveal months of depression and suicidal thoughts right when I suspect an affair. How the depression is the fault of our relationship, of him trying so hard and me never being happy. Pity party, anyone?
Near the end of our conversation, he turned to talk of “All I want is you.” “You’re everything to me.” “You’re the only thing that matters.” Total overcompensating, in my opinion. He’s telling me what he thinks I want to hear. Doesn’t every abusive husband in a Lifetime movie say this to his wife?
Later that night, he swept the floor and fed the dogs, all things which he never does. He asked if he could take me on a date the next night. All compliments and helpfulness. Red flags, right?
Am I crazy, or does this all add up? Please help. I feel like I'm going crazy over here.
Last edited by AmeliaBradley; 02-08-2016 at 04:43 PM.