Abandoned during anxiety depression

QuinteRandal · 10-04-2011, 10:08 PM

I have just recently been diagnosed with anxiety disorder and depression. Part of it has to do with post traumatic stress as a result of a high stress job. A couple of months ago I discovered that my wife wanted an affair and it literally put me over the edge.

I took this job and doubled my salary so that she could stay home with the kids. I booked overtime because she wanted me too so that we could pay off some debts. Now all she can think about is this other guy and blames it on me being mentally ill.

She has withdrawn all affection from me for more than two months now and when I asked her if she still loves me... she got mad that I asked and said "I'm not sure how I feel about you". I can't really initiate anything...talking (aside from being around kids) hugging, going out etc.

This has been incredibly painful for me since I feel like she has abandoned me during recovering from depression and is even mad at me for it.

After 17 years I really am tempted to leave her. She doesn't seem interested in working on our relationship other than going to counseling once a month. We are going through a trial separation but I can't help but wanting this to be over permanently.

Is it worth sticking this out? She is willing at least to go to counseling. I've tried several times to make amends with her only to be turned away. Why would she be so withdrawn and angry.

uphillbattle · 10-10-2011, 10:36 AM

"Why would she be so withdrawn and angry."
Have you asked her this very question? When I asked this to my wife a few years back I was kind of supprised she had a logical reason, although she didn't express that it was the problem until a ton of time had passed.