Re: Seeking advise
take care of yourself.
if your taking care of yourself bothers her, that is not your problem-- it's hers.
also, if you are overweight, don't start taking protein shakes. you need fewer calories in your diet, not more. protein supplements are for people who are training to gain weight, not lose it.
eat healthy food and monitor your calories. first establish your baseline daily calories. this is the amount you would eat that neither causes you to gain weight nor lose it. it should be somewhere in the range of 2200 to 2500 for an adult male.
once you've established your baseline, aim for a daily deficit of 100 to 200 calories below what it would take you to maintain your current weight. It will likely take you several weeks to nail this down.
the idea is that you lose weight very gradually with a mild, sustainable calorie deficit. this will make weight loss manageable and will not mess up your metabolism (which can happen with extreme diets).
if you combine this with a good exercise program, you will be in good shape in relatively short order.
the key is following a plan long term. it is a marathon, not a sprint. you're better off establishing exercise and diet that you can stick with rather than more extreme versions that will cause you to burn out.