Riverside MFT

In my practice, I work with a lot of couples where one or both people are dealing with some form of depression. I thought I would share some of my suggestions that I regularly give to couples (and individuals) that regularly come to me for counseling. These are things people can do to be able to better cope with their depression (on top of going to counseling and getting medication if needed).

1. Get moving. Aerobic exercise helps you release endorphins into your body. These endorphins will help you feel better and help you be able to better regulate your mood.
2. Get outside. Sunlight can be very helpful for those who are struggling with depression. Even if you live in a place that is often overcast or dark, even getting exposure to regular light can be helpful.
3. Get rest. Try to make regular routines for bedtime. TV is not a good thing to do to relax you mind. Try reading a book, or taking a warm shower. Try and get to bed at a reasonable hour.
4. Get socially involved with real people (not through the internet, or otherwise). Talk about marriage is an excellent website, but should not be a substitute for genuine human interaction. Social interaction is very important. Allow yourself to be with other family members or close friends. You don’t have to do all of the talking, simply being with other people can be helpful.
5. Listen to calming music. The power of music is incredible. It can help you calm down and relax. It can be hopeful and uplifting--great things to experience especially when you are depressed.

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Brian, Marriage Counselor
My Counseling Webpage (for California Residents)
Improve My Marriage Blog

daddymikey1975

Thank you for this tidbit..

I am very depressed.. paranoid and have lots of 'come and go' anxiety.. I do take meds for the depression and I have been seeing a therapist since April and this is some very sound advice. I will share this with my wife as well. She has been very patient with me while I travel down my dark road.

Just wanted to say thank you.

Jamison

Increasing B vitamins is supposed to help with depression as well. Studies have shown those who suffer from depression usually are deficient in B vitamins. Take a B complex.

Runs like Dog

Those are all great ideas. Get outside of yourself once in a while.

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Homemaker_Numero_Uno

Is it okay to allow yourself to be depressed temporarily in order to experience sadness over something that is really sad? How can one tell the difference between situational/relational sadness/grief and depression? Like today I told my adult son I need a good cry but my younger kids are home so that cannot happen. I suppose I will get my good cry later on, on the trusted shoulder of a friend who knows my husband was abusive and that I gave him a second chance. I have a lot of things to be pleased and happy about, but one big thing to be sorrowful about. It's enough that I will probably plan some sort of spiritual service to put my marriage to rest in peace, to symbolically bury it (along with my rings that I already smashed when I found out about husband's deceit and the extent of his abuse that I had minimized in order to be a good, understanding person). How can you distinguish depression from buried anger, is depression just anger that cannot come out?

I find that depression is easily lifted by doing small things for yourself or others. So depression itself doesn't bother me. But it is scary to think that the sort of depression that leads people to suicide exists. I lost my father to that and my STBXH has said to me that sometimes he thought/thinks about driving off the road to make it look like and accident so he will kill himself and I will still get insurance money. Even though I left him over abuse issues and deceit/outright lies, he still thinks that I married him only for his money. (I was making more than him and doing okay, it was only after being with him that my income declined. After I found an email to his OW I couldn't work fro quite a while, and in between there was just one issue after another that would interfere with my work. I could never get a stable lifestyle going with him as he would keep me hopping and create issue whenever things got too cozy for him. Yes I know he has issues, that's why he will be an X.) But for the depression, I would like to know more about the different types of depression and sadness and grief and the basic warning signs and what is situational/temporary and also healthy. When I was much younger I used to think that whatever got my dad would get me too...but I know from experience that it will not happen, I am not that kind of person. I go the distance for myself. Luckily, severe clinical depression does not seem to be in my makeup. When I am angry I do acknowledge it and have learned to channel it and find a good flow for it into positive action.

Thanks!

daddymikey1975

Yes.. I've been taking 20mg of Celexa for a couple months now.. Seems as if the therapeutic effect has waned.. I see a therapist every other week (used to be every week until a job change).. He suggested seeing my family doctor (just saw him last week) and wanted me to ask her if she wanted to increase my dosage of Celexa and/or have me start taking seroquel (sp?) or abilify.. He said a very small dose of either of those 2 can help keep the anxiety and '100 mph mind' slowed down to a manageable level.

I will also research Deplin to see what it is and does...

(B vitamins will be on my shopping menu soon as well..)

Thanks for the info.

Runs like Dog

Celexa is known to conk out for no known reason. Upping the dose is counter productive since it will create a higher threshold for withdrawal symptoms with no benefit. The fix is to switch to something else which is not citalopram.

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daddymikey1975

this is good knowledge to have. I will ask my doc for something else.

Mr B

All that stuff may help people who have a bad case of the blues. But clinical depression is most often caused by the dysregulation of neurotransmitters in the brain. The only way to fix that is with antidepressants which regulate the levels of dopamine, serotonin etc.

Flobot

One word Neurotherapy took my racing brain and just slowed it down to a nice pace .

If you cant afford it get a brain map done at the right specialist you can be put on the proper drug .. takes all the guessing game out .

MSP

Not true at all, sorry. Well, the cause may be, but the drug-only solution is most definitely not. All of the suggestions originally posted by Riverside MFT affect your neurochemistry. Clinical studies have shown that the things Riverside MFT listed are, on the long-term, more effective than anti-depressants. And there are no negative side-effects.

Mavash.

For me my depression was so severe that I was unable to do any of those things. I had no energy, underlying ptsd had me fearful of people, and any and all attempts to cheer me up just pissed me off.

Therapy was my only saving grace.

Riverside MFT

MSP, thank you for your support. I find it amazing that there are other things that can change one's brain chemistry besides just medications.

Mavash. Thank you for your comments. I think a combination of therapy and medication can often be a sort of jump start to help you get going again.

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Brian, Marriage Counselor
My Counseling Webpage (for California Residents)
Improve My Marriage Blog

Dad27

I have recently started taking some St. John's Wort and that has REALLY taken the edge off the depression and the anxiety that I have been experiencing. I have also heard that it can have negative effects in some people..........it has really helped me though...............

Runs like Dog

St. John's Wort is toxic in combination with SSRI's FYI.

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