Self Schadenfreude - Talk About Marriage
Physical & Mental Health Issues Marriage and relationships are difficult by themselves, but coping with physical or mental health problems can make things even more difficult.

User Tag List

 6Likes
  • 2 Post By Herschel
  • 1 Post By Andy1001
  • 1 Post By tech-novelist
  • 1 Post By Herschel
  • 1 Post By sixty-eight
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
post #1 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-13-2016, 11:05 PM Thread Starter
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 1,888
Self Schadenfreude

I find I have this weird sense of self schadenfreude. For those of you who don't know, or are too lazy to look it up, schadenfreude is taking please in someone else's misfortune. It can be really awful like death or something much more mild, like American Idol.

I seem to love the absurdness of my life. The more that goes wrong, the more I laugh. I tell other people just so I can enjoy their horror of listening to everything that has gone wrong. I definitely have started noticing it as I have been Ubering and people ask me about my life. I have sat at their stops and they won't get out until I have finished telling them. It doesn't hurt that I am a fairly good story teller, but I seem to enjoy how crappy everything has turned out. I guess I am not complaining since I have been generally happy. I have had a couple of friends wondering if I am crying on the inside, but I am not. Just enjoying my own misery.
Posted via Mobile Device

Herschel is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-13-2016, 11:54 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 2,055
Re: Self Schadenfreude

Quote:
Originally Posted by Herschel View Post
I find I have this weird sense of self schadenfreude. For those of you who don't know, or are too lazy to look it up, schadenfreude is taking please in someone else's misfortune. It can be really awful like death or something much more mild, like American Idol.

I seem to love the absurdness of my life. The more that goes wrong, the more I laugh. I tell other people just so I can enjoy their horror of listening to everything that has gone wrong. I definitely have started noticing it as I have been Ubering and people ask me about my life. I have sat at their stops and they won't get out until I have finished telling them. It doesn't hurt that I am a fairly good story teller, but I seem to enjoy how crappy everything has turned out. I guess I am not complaining since I have been generally happy. I have had a couple of friends wondering if I am crying on the inside, but I am not. Just enjoying my own misery.
Posted via Mobile Device
Sometimes hearing about other people's problems can help you cope with your own.
And misery loves company.
Andy1001 is offline  
post #3 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-14-2016, 12:53 AM
Banned
 
Join Date: Dec 2015
Posts: 6,304
Re: Self Schadenfreude

Your still married , right? Any chance you will take her back?
225985 is offline  
 
post #4 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-14-2016, 07:08 AM
Forum Supporter
 
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 5,519
Re: Self Schadenfreude

Quote:
Originally Posted by Herschel View Post
I find I have this weird sense of self schadenfreude. For those of you who don't know, or are too lazy to look it up, schadenfreude is taking please in someone else's misfortune. It can be really awful like death or something much more mild, like American Idol.

I seem to love the absurdness of my life. The more that goes wrong, the more I laugh. I tell other people just so I can enjoy their horror of listening to everything that has gone wrong. I definitely have started noticing it as I have been Ubering and people ask me about my life. I have sat at their stops and they won't get out until I have finished telling them. It doesn't hurt that I am a fairly good story teller, but I seem to enjoy how crappy everything has turned out. I guess I am not complaining since I have been generally happy. I have had a couple of friends wondering if I am crying on the inside, but I am not. Just enjoying my own misery.
Does it seem to help your tips?

Always remember the LD motto: "Sex isn't important!!!"
tech-novelist is offline  
post #5 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-14-2016, 08:23 AM
Member
 
SimplyAmorous's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 13,946
Re: Self Schadenfreude

I never knew there was a word for this.. there is a scripture I came across many yrs ago... it was one I never forgot -perfect for sharing on this thread...

.....

Human nature being what it is.. we all have a dark side.. are we in touch with our "Shadow" ? This is actually healthy -if we can face it... We ALL struggle with this at times.. if someone said they don't - I wouldn't believe them.. I struggle with it with one of my son's ex's, how her & his friend betrayed him...a double knife in the back.. heard through the grapevine they are getting married next year.. this put me in a FUNK all day...but then...I also heard something not so wonderful about him, that he isn't no prize after all.. I smiled, this uplifted me....finally his true colors are coming to light!! ...Even if she is too blind to see it right now...yeah I can admit that.. it's ugly...I still hate the guy... I consider him a conniving Judas what he did to our son.. acting like such a grand friend when all along -he was after his girlfriend...

Yeah this was about my kids.. I need to let it go.. but it still gets under my skin...I guess a Mother's wrath is not so pretty.. . oh I'll just sit back and see how it plays out.. honesty.. I have to pray against feeling this way.. Been there before, slowly it was lifted from me...which also healed a relationship.. Good came out of it.. even blessing..... There is a legitimate struggle here to overcome these tendencies , so I feel...

Not that I am proud to admit this..but Yeah.. I'm in touch with my shadow.. one could say..

SimplyAmorous is offline  
post #6 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-14-2016, 08:28 AM Thread Starter
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 1,888
Re: Self Schadenfreude

Quote:
Originally Posted by 225985 View Post
Your still married , right? Any chance you will take her back?
Yes, no.
Herschel is offline  
post #7 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-14-2016, 08:30 AM Thread Starter
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2016
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 1,888
Re: Self Schadenfreude

Quote:
Originally Posted by tech-novelist View Post
Does it seem to help your tips?
Maybe a couple times, and I think I could have parlayed it into sex if I wanted to (which I didn't).
Herschel is offline  
post #8 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-14-2016, 08:34 AM
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Great Lakes
Posts: 410
Re: Self Schadenfreude

it's a defense mechanism. If you can't look back and marvel/laugh at the absurdity of your situation, it would eat you alive.

I've been there. I get it.
dubsey is offline  
post #9 of 9 (permalink) Old 10-14-2016, 08:38 AM
Member
 
sixty-eight's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2015
Location: PA
Posts: 1,160
Re: Self Schadenfreude

I find this true too. My brother asks me what's going on in my life, and I tell him about STBX and all of his drama, and I laugh. The more ridiculous it gets, the more i laugh. And he shakes his head at me, like, how are you laughing at this? it's terrible!
I cried about all of the problems he made for me for years, i figure now that i'm out on my own, at least it's problems from a distance and I can laugh about it.

Forget enough to get over it, remember enough so it doesn't happen again.
sixty-eight is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on Talk About Marriage, you must first register. Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

Important! Your username will be visible to the public next to anything you post and could show up in search engines like Google. If you are concerned about anonymity, PLEASE choose a username that will not be recognizable to anyone you know.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome