Child Birth, Depression, Suicide, Divorce

CJP3212010 · 01-04-2012, 08:33 AM

My wife and I have been together for over 6 years, we have been married for the last year and a half and just had our first child. We have always had a hard time with life in general. One month after we met she almost died due to undiagnosed appendicitis. Her family has always been a problem. Her dad is an alcoholic and her mom is a depressed hypocondriac. One year after we met she moved in with me and my family to escape her step father. We lived with them for almost three years while i was in school. My parents have always been there for us but to the point that they got between me and my wife. And most recently my wife tried to kill her self one month after giving birth to our son. Now she has met another man who has been there for her and she has developed feelings for him. We have both said and done things in the last month that we regret and now she wants a divorce. I love my wife and would do anything to keep my family together. I have convinced her to try a Legal separation for the next year. We have not signed the papers yet, but the thought of her being intimate with another man makes me physically sick. Im so lost and dont know what to do.

I'mInLoveWithMyHubby · 01-04-2012, 09:18 AM

I hate to say this, but you've got to let her go. You can not make her or anyone love you. The more you beg and plead, the faster you'll push her away.

By reading a lot of posts on here, it's not likely she'll end up with him in the end. Your wife has some major issues to work out and needs professional help. The best you can do is be there for your son and be a good father.

Good luck.
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CJP3212010 · 01-04-2012, 12:45 PM

I appreciate the advice and i have agreed to give her a one year legal separation for her to figure out what she wants. I am a person who is willing to go to the ends of the earth to save my family. Even if that means letting her go so we can be happy. But I'm not ready to give up when I think there is still a chance to keep my family together. We have both agreed to keep our son out of it and when we are together around him we are great parents. We work perfectly together in that aspect. We work perfectly together in a lot of ways. Just our lives have become overwhelming. Financially, emotionally, physically, and family. I have recently received a job offer in another state away from most of our problems. I am going to talk to her tonight about it with the hopes that a fresh start will be exciting for her.

CJP3212010 · 01-04-2012, 12:51 PM

I don't know if this effects anything, but we are both young. Both of us are only 23 years old.

Shaggy · 01-04-2012, 02:54 PM

So your giving her permission to cuckold you for a year.

This is going to utterly destroy any love or respect she has left for you. No woman would want to return to a man so weak that he would accept that.

Instead give her a choice:

Choose you and the family, and to cut off all contact with the OM immediately.

Or

Choose the OM and you will divorce immediately.

I know you don't want to loose her, but the separation you describe is nothing more than approved cheating.
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Heartbroken19 · 02-01-2012, 03:12 AM

WOW!!! i am so shocked at how similar our stories are!! Your wife has issues that you CAN NOT fix! If she is this selfish as to basically ask you to wait for her so she can be with some one else for a year..why are you questioning a divorce?!! I know being young has ALOT to do with it .. my husband is 22 and i am 19. We have been through the cheating and our daughter is 1. Does she really want a divorce or just freedom to whatever she pleases?!