Re: Anyone deal with weight over 500lbs?
I think it's important to look at how this weight came on, as well as how she mentally feels about it. Weight is an extremely hard thing for most women to talk about with anyone. Personally I was heavy when I met my husband, and easily put on about 150lbs the first 5 years of marriage (and more since then). For us, it was me (a person who was raised on a strict diet and serving sizes, because I gain easily) moving in with him (a naturally thin, can eat anything in any quantity without gaining an ounce man) and eating the way he was. I had never had the freedom to choose my food and how much to eat, so I ate bite for bite what he did. If he ate 4 snacks a day, so was I, and I have paid the price.
For the last few years, I have desperately wanted to lose the weight. At first, he was fine with that, but as I started to change the dinner menu in the house, I realized that he really only wanted to support me, if it didn't effect him in any way. I am expected to fix him what he is use to, but then fix myself what I need to be healthier. He brings in sweets and offers them to me out of habit, and I have not been strong enough with it in my face to always turn it down. It has come to the point a couple times where I cry and beg for his help, and he is good for a couple weeks, and then old habits creep back in.
Food certainly CAN be an addiction. And it's a very hard one to kick because you can't live without food. It is offered to you in free samples, a little bite here at a family get together, someone makes something special for a holiday, your friends at work want a potluck, or your invited to a baby shower. It's everywhere. You sound like a VERY supportive husband, and it sounds like you two are both still in your early 30's. It's not to late to turn this around, but she will need your help. Tell her you are worried about both of your health. Tell her you love her, and want her in your life for as long as you can, and that healthy choices together, a walk after dinner, these things as a couple can help, as well as bring you closer. She may need a counselor who specializes in eating disorders as well. There are resources out there. You might even be able to find a support group for family members, and see how others have approached this with loved ones.