01-03-2014, 04:55 PM
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Lawrence, KS
| | Re: Really need you guys input!!
Agreed with Alpha. Your first move, if you haven't done so already, is to find out if there is another woman. In most cases, especially when you hear the "I love you but I'm not IN LOVE with you" line or some variation of that, as you did, there is another person involved. If things dramatically improved between you and him a month or so ago, I'd suspect that maybe something changed with the other woman or they broke up, and now he's just enjoying his freedom to date around and do whatever he wants.
IF there really isn't another person involved... or if there was and they've since broken up...
...then I would say that you still need to hold him accountable to his words and his actions. It sounds like you firmly believe that you want to be in a loving marriage, you want/need that commitment, which makes total sense of course. If so, then you have to make that clear to him. If he still feels that he doesn't love you or doesn't want to be married to you and can't commit, then you need to go ahead and pursue divorce. (The divorce process will last long enough that he'll have plenty of time to reconsider what he wants, in case you are worried about moving too quickly) In the meantime, you can choose to still be friendly with him if you feel comfortable with that (which I doubt you do, I know I wouldn't) and then clearly restate that you desire to be in a loving relationship with someone and will consider yourself free to pursue that with other men effective immediately.
Again, be as friendly as you like, but you've just got to make sure everything is fully understood regarding what the nature of your relationship is.