One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW - Page 7 - Talk About Marriage
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post #91 of 228 (permalink) Old 01-23-2015, 02:15 PM Thread Starter
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

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Originally Posted by cdbaker View Post
Him sending you that video is odd... could be a number of reasons...

Could be him just trying to hurt you some more, a "guilt trip" of sorts, like saying, "Hey Remember our good times? Remember how you enjoyed this? But you still threw it all away? Yep, are you happy now??" If so, remember that this is likely just his (cruel) way of dealing with his own pain/anger that he seems to be holding onto tightly.

It could be him feeling sad or nostalgic. Sending it to you as if you remind you of a positive memory that you too might miss or wish you could have back again as well.

I probably would have told him off in that situation, calmly. Asking why he would send that to you? If that's something he wants with you again, then say so and start working with you to make that happen. If he is just trying to be mean, then he and his repeated cruelty can just go f**k himself. Heck, getting upset about it might show him that it hurts you too, that it still means something to you. (Obviously it does, but he might be doubtful)
I'm going to go with nostalgic. I looked at his computer to see where the heck he got that video and what he was doing with it, and I found pictures of his ex in his recent documents\. He also specifically googled "Tall Skinny Porn", which is the body type his ex has. I'm short and thick.. and pregnant.

At first I thought he was going to post the video of him and I online or something mean like that, but I guess he was just reminiscing. It really bothers me but at the same time I need to start detaching from the painful stuff. Either he was sending that video to beckon me to the bedroom, which I have no interest in after he told me he wants nothing to do with me and he hates me- or he was feeling nostalgic about all of his past relationships or the "better times". If he wants tall and skinny he's in the wrong place. When he snuck that picture of a woman's butt in the bar he hangs out at, she was also tall and skinny. Nothing like me.

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post #92 of 228 (permalink) Old 01-30-2015, 03:43 PM
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

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Originally Posted by rrhouse View Post
My problem now is that my husband will not commit to reconciliation nor divorce. He feels that I could not give our child a good life on my own and he doesn't want to hurt our daughter by divorcing me. So technically he's married to our daughter right now, because he makes it clear most of the time that he's not interested in me.
And that is a problem for reconciliation. But sorry to say, its something you are just going to have to put up with for a while until he decides what is going to happen. Remember, you did this to him. Its painful and makes even the most rational of us act irrational.



Quote:
I am trying so very hard to help him heal: I paid for counseling for a month- he decided he didn't want to go anymore because the counselor "sucks"
Does he see the counselor as being on your side of things or shifting blame to him? Or is it just and excuse not to go?


Quote:
I cut off friends involved with the affair, I don't go anywhere alone unless I'm running errands, I have ONE friend that I talk to that he is nice to her face and mean behind her back, I have been quiet about the pregnancy because he didn't want it, I delete males on Facebook as he picks them out and decides I might cheat on him with them, I let him vent and yell and call me names and don't expect an apology, and I'm still going to IC. What more can I do?
First off I don't condone the name calling (although if it is anything related to "cheater", I don't blame him)

What more can you do? Be patient. IF he decides its time to let it go, it needs to be on his timetable. Isn't much more you can do other than that.

If I were to stay with a cheating partner, they'd have to be at least doing the things you are already doing.



Quote:
He still calls me a ****, says he doesn't want the baby, yet he doesn't want a divorce, is angry that I'm doing positive things with myself because I should be on his level of depression.. He spends several days a week drinking at bars with his friend and then coming home and letting me have it in the form of a drunken monologue/rant. I just can't figure out ways to help him heal. He keeps saying "You fix it!" but I can only do so much on my own.

He may be in too much pain to reconcile. Its a heavy blow to be dealt. I understand his anger and his roller coaster of emotions. (but his calling you specific names isn't acceptable)

So at this point you have only 2 choices since you are already doing things expected of a WS that is supposed to be in reconciliation.

1) give it more time, be patient with him

or 2) realize that its never going to get better and take steps towards divorce
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post #93 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-06-2015, 03:41 PM
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

Sorry for both of you. Hope you and your kids stay safe.

Be sure when things are calm and with someone around to protect you, to let him know that you are leaving because he is in such pain and abusing you. Tell him you are sorry for his pain, but he has made it impossible for you to be safe.

I do realize that sometimes we hurt each other. Recently, I was having a bad dream. My wife woke me up because I was hollering in my sleep. In my dream, I was trying to push the OM out of our house and close the door. She told me that I was hollering at her to close the door. Yes the pain hurts, but lately, I have been trying to deal with the grief, anger and pain in positive ways.

Someone has to tell your H that all this anger is going to get him into trouble. I am trying to decrease my anger with exercise and removing myself from the situation. I hope someone will help him see that the expression of the anger will get him in trouble. I was angry and I started to drive and the anger was expressed as an angry driver. I did not do anything, but my wife told me that I needed to change. I am seeing a counselor by myself to work my attitude and the anger. From her actions, I felt like a worthless man. But I do have some good points. I have worked hard for many years to support my family. If we get divorced and we split 50/50, she will only get over half a million, but hopefully she would not get more than that, and she would lose over a half a million of our assets to me. Our children are grown, but I still have to loan them money from time to time but I would not have to pay child support. If I have to pay alimony, I will quit my job.
We started out with little when we were married, I only had a few thousand dollars. I do have faults, but I am trying to see that I also have some self-esteem hopefully someday.

However, I do feel compassion for my wife. Recently she was in a car wreck. She was not physically hurt. But she was emotionally scarred by the experience. The other driver started cursing her, and screaming at her. He got out of his vehicle and made a lousy example for his kid that was in his car. My wife started to get out, but when he started kicking our car, keying our car and tearing off the windshield wipers, and kicking the car and trying to break the windows, she got back in the car and called 911. So my wife is crying to the 911 operator.

He gets back into his car when the sirens are heard. So she is pressing charges. He now has a criminal complaint against him.

The officer talked to me on the phone. He told me to stay away so that I did not make the situation worse. I wanted to come help her.

Your H may not care, but if he is not careful with the expression of his anger, he can get in a mess. I wish my wife would not have had this experience, and we are not finished with this yet. But it is a good lesson for me to see what could happen to me, if I do not get my anger under control.

I only share this to try and help. You can't stay with you and your kids with this abuse. But be safe. Try and help your H even if you are away from him to honestly tell him if he is of any worth. But do be honest.

If my wife's OM was so much better than me, I would like to know.

good luck to you and your kids, stay safe. It was not a good idea to cheat, but you do not have to take the abuse. Hope you both can start treating each other better.

Last edited by harrybrown; 02-06-2015 at 03:44 PM. Reason: edit
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post #94 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-08-2015, 09:29 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by vellocet View Post
Quote:
Originally Posted by rrhouse View Post
My problem now is that my husband will not commit to reconciliation nor divorce. He feels that I could not give our child a good life on my own and he doesn't want to hurt our daughter by divorcing me. So technically he's married to our daughter right now, because he makes it clear most of the time that he's not interested in me.
And that is a problem for reconciliation. But sorry to say, its something you are just going to have to put up with for a while until he decides what is going to happen. Remember, you did this to him. Its painful and makes even the most rational of us act irrational.



Quote:
I am trying so very hard to help him heal: I paid for counseling for a month- he decided he didn't want to go anymore because the counselor "sucks"
Does he see the counselor as being on your side of things or shifting blame to him? Or is it just and excuse not to go?


Quote:
I cut off friends involved with the affair, I don't go anywhere alone unless I'm running errands, I have ONE friend that I talk to that he is nice to her face and mean behind her back, I have been quiet about the pregnancy because he didn't want it, I delete males on Facebook as he picks them out and decides I might cheat on him with them, I let him vent and yell and call me names and don't expect an apology, and I'm still going to IC. What more can I do?
First off I don't condone the name calling (although if it is anything related to "cheater", I don't blame him)

What more can you do? Be patient. IF he decides its time to let it go, it needs to be on his timetable. Isn't much more you can do other than that.

If I were to stay with a cheating partner, they'd have to be at least doing the things you are already doing.



Quote:
He still calls me a ****, says he doesn't want the baby, yet he doesn't want a divorce, is angry that I'm doing positive things with myself because I should be on his level of depression.. He spends several days a week drinking at bars with his friend and then coming home and letting me have it in the form of a drunken monologue/rant. I just can't figure out ways to help him heal. He keeps saying "You fix it!" but I can only do so much on my own.

He may be in too much pain to reconcile. Its a heavy blow to be dealt. I understand his anger and his roller coaster of emotions. (but his calling you specific names isn't acceptable)

So at this point you have only 2 choices since you are already doing things expected of a WS that is supposed to be in reconciliation.

1) give it more time, be patient with him

or 2) realize that its never going to get better and take steps towards divorce

I know this is painful and life altering experience, and I feel absolutely terrible for inflicting this upon him. I have tried to just be patient with being in limbo, and I really wouldn't mind if it didn't also mean him being emotionally and verbally abusive towards me and him neglecting our children, drinking constantly, spending all of our money on booze and skipping groceries and doctor bills, etc. For everything abusive he does, he uses the excuse that I made him the person he is.

This is unacceptable. If he can't also take responsibility for his abusive and wrong behavior, we have a one sided marriage. He was emotionally abusive and an alcoholic before I cheated. I am sorry for cheating and wanted to help him heal, but at this point I'm realizing I wasn't happy to begin with and things will not change. I have to let go. The efforts I've made for a year are for nothing, as he refuses to recognize them and even belittled .

He keeps telling me letting go won't help because we will still have to interact to co-parent and he will still resent me for "forcing" him to divorce his family. In my opinion he's never home, he doesn't interact with our kid at home, and he yells at me and name calls in front of her. That's a sad excuse for a parent and THAT is not my fault. Sorry. How he chooses to keep picking the scab is not on me.

This is unhealthy for all of us.
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post #95 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-08-2015, 09:37 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by harrybrown View Post
Sorry for both of you. Hope you and your kids stay safe.

Be sure when things are calm and with someone around to protect you, to let him know that you are leaving because he is in such pain and abusing you. Tell him you are sorry for his pain, but he has made it impossible for you to be safe.

I do realize that sometimes we hurt each other. Recently, I was having a bad dream. My wife woke me up because I was hollering in my sleep. In my dream, I was trying to push the OM out of our house and close the door. She told me that I was hollering at her to close the door. Yes the pain hurts, but lately, I have been trying to deal with the grief, anger and pain in positive ways.

Someone has to tell your H that all this anger is going to get him into trouble. I am trying to decrease my anger with exercise and removing myself from the situation. I hope someone will help him see that the expression of the anger will get him in trouble. I was angry and I started to drive and the anger was expressed as an angry driver. I did not do anything, but my wife told me that I needed to change. I am seeing a counselor by myself to work my attitude and the anger. From her actions, I felt like a worthless man. But I do have some good points. I have worked hard for many years to support my family. If we get divorced and we split 50/50, she will only get over half a million, but hopefully she would not get more than that, and she would lose over a half a million of our assets to me. Our children are grown, but I still have to loan them money from time to time but I would not have to pay child support. If I have to pay alimony, I will quit my job.
We started out with little when we were married, I only had a few thousand dollars. I do have faults, but I am trying to see that I also have some self-esteem hopefully someday.

However, I do feel compassion for my wife. Recently she was in a car wreck. She was not physically hurt. But she was emotionally scarred by the experience. The other driver started cursing her, and screaming at her. He got out of his vehicle and made a lousy example for his kid that was in his car. My wife started to get out, but when he started kicking our car, keying our car and tearing off the windshield wipers, and kicking the car and trying to break the windows, she got back in the car and called 911. So my wife is crying to the 911 operator.

He gets back into his car when the sirens are heard. So she is pressing charges. He now has a criminal complaint against him.

The officer talked to me on the phone. He told me to stay away so that I did not make the situation worse. I wanted to come help her.

Your H may not care, but if he is not careful with the expression of his anger, he can get in a mess. I wish my wife would not have had this experience, and we are not finished with this yet. But it is a good lesson for me to see what could happen to me, if I do not get my anger under control.

I only share this to try and help. You can't stay with you and your kids with this abuse. But be safe. Try and help your H even if you are away from him to honestly tell him if he is of any worth. But do be honest.

If my wife's OM was so much better than me, I would like to know.

good luck to you and your kids, stay safe. It was not a good idea to cheat, but you do not have to take the abuse. Hope you both can start treating each other better.

His anger is overtaking his life and he is being stubborn and choosing to drink it away. I have suggested healthy alternatives and he shuts them down because "they don't work".

I am sorry you are going through a similar pain and I applaud you for taking a healthier route to recovery. That alone should tell you that you have good qualities and are a valuable person.

My husband is fascinated with revenge and lately has suggested I lure OM to me do he can physically assault him. I have no idea where this guy is or how to get a hold of him, but H keeps digging through my phone to find clues. He apparently won't rest until OM "Bites a curb".
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post #96 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-08-2015, 09:50 AM Thread Starter
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He sent me this text while I was putting our daughter to sleep last night. It was our 5 year anniversary, but next week will be the 1 year anniversary of my infidelity. He tried to get me to look at pictures of myself from that time while he narrated how sh*tty of a person I am, but I refused. If he'll never forgive me, I see no benefit in allowing him to beat me down.

Here's the text:

I still think, to this day, you dont fully understand what a marriage is. The type of person you were (are -minus being pregnant) when I met you was never obviously meant to be wife material. I fell in love with and had a beautiful child with someone who was just along for the ride, getting taken care of. instead of working out problems with your HUSBAND, you turned to someone else... that kind of personality, attitude, mentality cannot be fixed or changed. That's who you are and always will be. Unfortunately I'm the one who has to live with it, living with my mistake for the rest of my life. I may just be angry and venting, but go through all I've gone through and try not to feel the same

It's easy to say "we should just end this" but you don't understand it means I have to put my daughter out on the street, because her mother did something to me that caused me to hate her





notice: He hates me and my personality is flawed. He knew I wasn't "wife material" and married me anyway, and for a year and a half let me know all the ways I was inadequate before I said I couldn't do it anymore and we needed help. I said many times if we didn't get help I couldn't stay married and his response was "I'm not a little b**ch, I don't have time for your emotions. YOU DEAL WITH IT, it's not my problem."

I dealt with it the wrong way for sure, but for him to say I never tried working things out is utter bs. It makes me so angry that he has not only labeled me a wh*re for life, but is rewriting the history of our marriage .

Also, saying I was along for the ride and being taken care of : I worked at home part time through pregnancy and the 1st 3 years of our child's life because I wanted to contribute. All the while he made fun of my job and belittled it because it wasn't manual labor like his job.

I'm at a point where his actions disgust me. We were intimate 2 nights ago and then he did this yesterday. I'm done.
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post #97 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-08-2015, 10:08 AM
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

So he was neglectful in the past, and all his partners cheated on him, that is his issue to work on. If he does not see a pattern of why his relationships keep failing, that is on him. You just own what you did, you don't own his previous neglect. Even if you get past the infidelity, and you both stayed married, he would still be a neglectful spouse.

I am assuming that he has anger issues stemming from his past. Even if you left him, his next wife is likely to cheat on him also. If he cannot see his own faults, then any relationship he comes into, will fail no matter what.

You need to focus on you. Work on your flaws to minimize them for a successful future. Chances are, you are highly more likely to find a fulfilling relationship, while he will continue the same pattern with every relationship he enters, until he looks at himself.

People do change if they learn. It is called wisdom for a reason. So learn and gain wisdom from this debacle, and know you can be a better person than from this. All of us has caused someone else pain along the way, doesn't mean that we are condemn to misery forever. I have known people whom left prison and make a positive influence on the younger generation's lives.

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post #98 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-08-2015, 11:40 AM
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

He's abusive and if you stay your daughter will pick an abusive husband too because it will be all she knows; she'll be taught that that's all women deserve.

Get out now.
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post #99 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-09-2015, 10:08 AM
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

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Originally Posted by rrhouse View Post
I know this is painful and life altering experience, and I feel absolutely terrible for inflicting this upon him. I have tried to just be patient with being in limbo, and I really wouldn't mind if it didn't also mean him being emotionally and verbally abusive towards me and him neglecting our children, drinking constantly, spending all of our money on booze and skipping groceries and doctor bills, etc. For everything abusive he does, he uses the excuse that I made him the person he is.

This is unacceptable. If he can't also take responsibility for his abusive and wrong behavior, we have a one sided marriage. He was emotionally abusive and an alcoholic before I cheated. I am sorry for cheating and wanted to help him heal, but at this point I'm realizing I wasn't happy to begin with and things will not change. I have to let go. The efforts I've made for a year are for nothing, as he refuses to recognize them and even belittled .

He keeps telling me letting go won't help because we will still have to interact to co-parent and he will still resent me for "forcing" him to divorce his family. In my opinion he's never home, he doesn't interact with our kid at home, and he yells at me and name calls in front of her. That's a sad excuse for a parent and THAT is not my fault. Sorry. How he chooses to keep picking the scab is not on me.

This is unhealthy for all of us.
Then divorce him. As far as his behavior it will do 1 of 2 things.

1) make him even worse, and a downward spiral of being an alcoholic

or 2) once he is not with you any longer, it will be hard, perhaps he finds someone else, realizes life IS worth living, and he will improve.

Either way, I don't see this getting any better being with you. So it needs to end.
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post #100 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-11-2015, 11:14 AM Thread Starter
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

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Then divorce him. As far as his behavior it will do 1 of 2 things.

1) make him even worse, and a downward spiral of being an alcoholic

or 2) once he is not with you any longer, it will be hard, perhaps he finds someone else, realizes life IS worth living, and he will improve.

Either way, I don't see this getting any better being with you. So it needs to end.

My plans to divorce haven't changed. As the pregnancy progresses, I have been slowly organizing my belongings and packing things away. I do worry that our first child is going to associate the baby with the separation and might resent her for it. Right now she is so excited to have a little sister and I'd hate for that to change.

My last posts were more of emotional venting than anything else. I'm not confused about what needs to happen, but it does still hurt. After sending all the mean text messages, the next day he tagged along to lunch with my mom, daughter, and I.

We initially had plans to go do our taxes that day, so I asked him if he still wanted to go. He just looked at me and then looked away. He didn't answer, so I called my mom up and made plans with her. Without telling him anything or speaking to him anymore about it, my daughter and I began to get dressed an ready and he did too. I guess he just assumed I was getting ready to do taxes. When my mom showed up he looked confused and said he thought we were doing our taxes. I said "I asked you and you didn't answer, so I made other plans." Because he was already dressed I invited him to tag along, just to be polite. I was still annoyed that he ignored me when I asked him to do the taxes earlier, but whatever. I'm still a human being and didn't want to be completely rude. It ended up being a nice, beautiful day. Our daughter ran around and played, I ate lots of food and visited with my mom, he kind of went back and forth between us and the bar.

Since then he's been pretty civil, but hasn't even mentioned the texts or the conversation we had Saturday. I'm tired of the confusing behavior on his part. He gets drunk, tells me he hates me and then the next day continues life as usual, but he doesn't talk to me, touch me, etc. He bought our daughter a trampoline yesterday for no reason. I don't understand him and I feel like he does this to keep me confused and tripped up so he has control. Even though I've told him several times that I plan on leaving when the baby is born, I doubt he heard me. If he did hear me, he probably doesn't believe me. I'm sure he'll act surprised when it happens.

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post #101 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-11-2015, 11:24 AM Thread Starter
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

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So he was neglectful in the past, and all his partners cheated on him, that is his issue to work on. If he does not see a pattern of why his relationships keep failing, that is on him. You just own what you did, you don't own his previous neglect. Even if you get past the infidelity, and you both stayed married, he would still be a neglectful spouse.

I am assuming that he has anger issues stemming from his past. Even if you left him, his next wife is likely to cheat on him also. If he cannot see his own faults, then any relationship he comes into, will fail no matter what.

You need to focus on you. Work on your flaws to minimize them for a successful future. Chances are, you are highly more likely to find a fulfilling relationship, while he will continue the same pattern with every relationship he enters, until he looks at himself.

People do change if they learn. It is called wisdom for a reason. So learn and gain wisdom from this debacle, and know you can be a better person than from this. All of us has caused someone else pain along the way, doesn't mean that we are condemn to misery forever. I have known people whom left prison and make a positive influence on the younger generation's lives.

I don't know why all of his relationships end in infidelity. He says in the past he used to be overprotective and clingy. My problem with him is that he was the opposite of clingy- he could care less what I did! He even told me that at the time I cheated he thought we were just "doing our own thing". He knew our marriage was in trouble and figured the best solution was to go out and do his own thing (drinking with the guys) and push me out of the house, away from him, to do my own thing (drinking with the girls- BAD IDEA). I never bring up his past relationships because I'm sure it's incredibly painful for him to have this keep happening. He has mentioned that it makes him feel completely worthless and wonder what's wrong with him.

I plan on taking this experience as a sign that I have a lot of personal issues I need to address. Talking to my counselor, I realized that I have some childhood issues that cause me to choose relationships that are chaotic and "fixer uppers" (OM was a complete loser, couch surfer with no job), because I find peace in the chaos due to the way I grew up. I also noticed that my stepfather, who I call my father, was JUST like my husband. My mom and I have been talking about divorce and neglect and she told me a few weeks ago that my dad used to completely ignore her for weeks at a time if he was upset with her. My grandma even vouched for this, saying we would all go out to dinner and he would talk to everyone at the table except her. As a kid I guess I never noticed this, but it's interesting that I would marry a man that did the exact same thing to me. I have so much respect for my dad, but at the same time I'm noticing the similarities and wondering how I never noticed his passive aggressive tendencies as a child.
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post #102 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-11-2015, 11:28 AM
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

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We initially had plans to go do our taxes that day, so I asked him if he still wanted to go. He just looked at me and then looked away. He didn't answer, so I called my mom up and made plans with her. Without telling him anything or speaking to him anymore about it, my daughter and I began to get dressed an ready and he did too. I guess he just assumed I was getting ready to do taxes. When my mom showed up he looked confused and said he thought we were doing our taxes. I said "I asked you and you didn't answer, so I made other plans."
This is EXACTLY what my IC has been telling me to say to my H for years. I've always been too chicken. Our lives are a disaster because of it, always changing at his whim. I wish I had your courage.
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post #103 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-11-2015, 11:53 AM Thread Starter
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

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This is EXACTLY what my IC has been telling me to say to my H for years. I've always been too chicken. Our lives are a disaster because of it, always changing at his whim. I wish I had your courage.
Thank you. I don't think of myself as courageous, so it feels good to read that.

I just get so tired of him blatantly ignoring me when I speak directly to him, so I thought I'd make my own plans and not let him ruin such a beautiful day. I did end up feeling guilty after, hence why I invited him to lunch with us anyway. Originally I hoped to just walk out the door without him.
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post #104 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-11-2015, 12:09 PM
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

I think you're actually paying for what he perceives to be the collective sins of his exes. Based on his treatment of you prior it's clear he came to this marriage with a b!tch up his behind, and after the cheating you started paying for all infidelities done by his exes. So it's not only anger at you, it's his collective anger at all exes and probably all women because they've shoved vast amounts of evil at poor victim him. You can't fix it. He'll probably fall apart initially without you to be his punching bag but he might enthusiastic eventually move past it. With you there he'll only wallow in pity and anger and drink himself to death.

You should probably stop sleeping with him, it just makes you look weak.

I really pity the next woman in his life..... he'll view her as a cheap piece and receptacle of all his anger.
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post #105 of 228 (permalink) Old 02-11-2015, 01:08 PM
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Re: One Sided "Reconciliation"- I am WW

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Originally Posted by rrhouse View Post
He spends several days a week drinking at bars with his friend and then coming home and letting me have it in the form of a drunken monologue/rant.
There's what I was looking for. So he hasn't changed. He's still an a-hole and a danger to you, himself and his family. And he's done nothing to fix himself.

You cheated, came clean, did everything you were supposed to do. A little TOO much, if you ask me. You're taking WAY too much of the blame. The state your "family" is in right now is 100% on him. You need to understand that. HE needs to understand that.

No more apologies. No more groveling. Look him straight in the eye, and with as much self-righteous indignation you can muster, tell him to fix his ass or you're gone. Sell it. He needs to know you are serious.

You're 26? Your whole life ahead of you. You don't need this.

When the F**K are men going to learn how to treat women?
MachoMcCoy is offline  
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