Re: suggestions on how to reconcile
I read your thread, but still haven't figured out why you went all the way to threatening D just because she was being selfish and you were tired when you really didn't mean it.
If she were this way all the time (and it sounds like she is) it would be understandable that you would get tired of it, and decide to end the relationship.
What is puzzling to me is that you said it without meaning it. My first husband used to get angry and tell me that he wanted a D. At the time I didn't realize he was just being mean and manipulative. He even went so far twice to say say he was going to the lawyer's and left the home for a few hours. At the time I also lived in a foreign country at the time. I would feel abandoned and frightened whenever he would do that. I cried in desperation more than once, and was relieved when he came back and apologized.
But one day he said it one time too many. I did not take him back when he came back saying he was sorry. He was shocked. I told him I wanted a D, and followed through with it, and that was one of the best decisions I had made for a long time.
If your wife comes back to you, you had better make sure that word never comes out of your mouth again, unless you really want to follow through.
Instead of lashing out with the D word, learn to express what you are really feeling, before you are thoroughly exasperated and worn out. Talking will get you far. She needs to do some growing up as well, but she is going to have to be willing to do that herself.
The both of you need to do some counseling to learn how to communicate better, and respect each other's boundaries.
Last edited by Araucaria; 12-25-2015 at 07:07 PM.