Hey, I feel like everything I do is a mistake. Looking for some different perspectives, hope someone can help. We're mid-30's, no kids, my 1st marriage, her 2nd, I pulled her away from her ex. We've been together 8 years, married 3. Here's the rest...
Wife came to me probably over a year ago and said "I'm unhappy, feel unloved, no fireworks". I tried to do things for her to fix it but apparently not enough or in the right way. Mistake #1
She started an affair w/ a co-worker who is also married, every Friday night for awhile. I finally got her to admit it but it took a lot of grinding. Mistake #2
I rode her ass about the affair too much and she finally got sick of talking about it and stonewalled me. Mistake #3.
I took a personal leave of absence from work and went to another state to be w/ family for 2 months. Mistake #4.
Of course the affair started back up while I was gone and she admitted it to me after grinding on her. Mistake #5
I told her to quit her job and we'll move out of state. She agreed. I think this was actually a good idea.
After putting in her notice, I found out she slept w/ this guy AGIAN. I'm still out of state.
I told her to keep her job, I'm coming back to the home state but don't want to be w/ her anymore. She agreed to let me stay in the apartment that's in her name until I find other arrangements 1-2 months. Mistake #5
I want to talk about affair stuff and only last 2 days in the apartment. Stormed out on her, revoked a car from her that was in my name and sofa surfed for awhile before getting an apt. All mistakes.
Now we're separated for sure. I've told her I think we can STILL work it out. She says she doesn't think she wants to be w/ me. "Think" gives me a glimmer of hope.
Think she's just messing w/ me emotionally or means it? I've since read to break off all contact and I've done that. Is my ego just damaged and I'm crazy for wanting her back in my life? Have I done so much damage she'll never talk to me again? I know for now all I can do is wait to see if she calls/texts or gchats me. IF she does that, what's my next move?
Wife came to me probably over a year ago and said "I'm unhappy, feel unloved, no fireworks". I tried to do things for her to fix it but apparently not enough or in the right way. Mistake #1
She started an affair w/ a co-worker who is also married, every Friday night for awhile. I finally got her to admit it but it took a lot of grinding. Mistake #2
I rode her ass about the affair too much and she finally got sick of talking about it and stonewalled me. Mistake #3.
I took a personal leave of absence from work and went to another state to be w/ family for 2 months. Mistake #4.
Of course the affair started back up while I was gone and she admitted it to me after grinding on her. Mistake #5
I told her to quit her job and we'll move out of state. She agreed. I think this was actually a good idea.
After putting in her notice, I found out she slept w/ this guy AGIAN. I'm still out of state.
I told her to keep her job, I'm coming back to the home state but don't want to be w/ her anymore. She agreed to let me stay in the apartment that's in her name until I find other arrangements 1-2 months. Mistake #5
I want to talk about affair stuff and only last 2 days in the apartment. Stormed out on her, revoked a car from her that was in my name and sofa surfed for awhile before getting an apt. All mistakes.
Now we're separated for sure. I've told her I think we can STILL work it out. She says she doesn't think she wants to be w/ me. "Think" gives me a glimmer of hope.
Think she's just messing w/ me emotionally or means it? I've since read to break off all contact and I've done that. Is my ego just damaged and I'm crazy for wanting her back in my life? Have I done so much damage she'll never talk to me again? I know for now all I can do is wait to see if she calls/texts or gchats me. IF she does that, what's my next move?