I am so sorry you are going through this. Can you get some individual counseling on your own? Are there any support groups in your area for young women in your situation?
I am not from India and don't know the culture but in general here are some things you can do to help you not feel so lost:
1. I would strongly suggest you start to do some research to find out your rights. Gather information - as much as you can so that you can make informed decisions on how to proceed and not emotional ones. Google divorce in India or your area. Read articles. Perhaps talk to some attorneys to see how to best protect yourself. If you can, try to find some strong woman who handled a divorce and came out ok and talk to them about what they did and what they would recommend. Information is power, knowing your rights is power, knowing the laws is power. Empower yourself so that you are dealing with facts and not fear!
2. I would not chase after him or come across as needy. But I would let him know that you do not want to end the marriage, that you want to try to work things out with a marriage counselor first before going down the divorce road - but that you will not accept being married to him if he is having an affair. Tell him - that you deserve better than that! Tell him you are willing to work on your part of the troubles in the marriage, but you will not work with him until the other woman is out of his life. (As long as he is in contact with her - he can't and won't work on the marriage) Don't beg and don't lower your standards and expectations. You can be loving, but firm. You can be understanding - but not accepting. You can forgive without condoning. You don't have to accept infidelity - no matter what country you live in. You deserve better!!
3. Start communicating with him in writing, emails or texts. And save them all - what you write and his responses. That way you have a record in case you need it later. Also you can make sure you are saying what you want to say and not reacting emotionally to what he says to you.
4. Talk to your family and share your concerns. Tell them that you can not accept infidelity - that you deserve to be treated better than that. Make it clear to them your desires. They may put pressure on you to stay married - but in the end it's still your choice. You have the right to do what you feel is best for you - you deserve to do what is best for you.
Right now - take the power back for yourself. Look in the mirror and tell yourself over and over - I am a good person. I deserve to be happy and loved. I do not deserve to be cheated on. I will not accept less than to have a man who loves me and is faithful to me! Say this over and over until you believe it.
The laws may be backward in your country, and it may be hard to work around them - but look for people who can help you. I'll bet there are women and or groups who are trying to change things for the better. Try to find them and talk to them to see if they can give you some ideas and help. Good Luck. Again - I am really sorry that your husband is doing this to you! But HE is the one in the wrong - you are still a good person that deserves to be happy and loved. Remember that!!! http://india.blogs.nytimes.com/2012/...raw-deal/?_r=0