She is moving back home.... - Page 10 - Talk About Marriage
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post #136 of 142 (permalink) Old 08-14-2014, 12:22 AM
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Re: She is moving back home....

What advice helped? What was self-defeating?

Did some core love survive the difficult period? Or is your love something new born in the ashes?

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post #137 of 142 (permalink) Old 08-16-2014, 08:10 PM Thread Starter
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Re: She is moving back home....

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What advice helped? What was self-defeating?

Did some core love survive the difficult period? Or is your love something new born in the ashes?
Not sure I can point to one bit of advice I received and can't speak for her. I know for me it was a commitment to try anything. So I spent much time seeking help. Reading books, Divorce Buster was very helpful, support from family, church groups, a couple of counselors (the first was a bad fit with his own issues, the second much better and became our MC).

I think it was a core love. We had a very good marriage before the shock of hearing her say she was done. (Walk away wife description which is a form of MLC from what I have read.) I knew the one I loved could not ignore all the good we had shared even though she denied we ever had good during MC.

Patience and perseverance were the key. We nearly didn't make it, but we survived.

Best wishes!
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post #138 of 142 (permalink) Old 11-27-2014, 06:34 AM Thread Starter
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Re: She is moving back home....

I am thankful to have a loving Wife!

Wishing all a Happy Thanksgiving!
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post #139 of 142 (permalink) Old 02-20-2016, 04:47 PM Thread Starter
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Re: She is moving back home....

Haven't been here in years and happy to report our marriage is solid and loving!

I hope my story from years ago can give a positive option to those who won't walk away with giving it their best shot.

Peace to those in need.
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post #140 of 142 (permalink) Old 02-21-2016, 11:01 AM
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Re: She is moving back home....

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The million dollar question which the MC will explore. I believe a series of reasons, including love. We have shared some close moments in recent visits. I believe she is showing signs of waking from the MLC fog a bit.

It will be a rough road ahead with all the complications of other relationships, which we have already acknowledged.

Wish us well with positive thoughts.
What other relationships?
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post #141 of 142 (permalink) Old 02-21-2016, 11:18 AM
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Re: She is moving back home....

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I remember how shocked I was to find my marriage in turmoil. It was very confusing how my wife had gone that far to call for divorce. I was determined to do all I could to save it, understanding it may still fail.

In hindsight it was clearly a midlife crisis combined with her being surrounded by some wounded people giving her bad advice. I see alot of that same bad advice given at this website, by wounded people here with their own problems. I personally experienced this and would have ended my marriage if I took their advice.

My marriage is now stronger than it was before her MLC which is a temporary mental glitch that many suffer. It passes and requires patience and those on the receiving end to not add fuel to the fire.

All the best to those who will look at the forest for the trees.
Didn't you have to have patience while she dated other men?

Going to lunch with single young men is dating.
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post #142 of 142 (permalink) Old 05-13-2016, 08:01 PM
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Re: She is moving back home....

TIM, haven't read the entire story but it sounds to me that there was a huge amount of sacrificial love going on in your side? Not many have the stomach for that, difficult to do that in your own strength, which I suspect you didn't ; just saying.
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