Re: Heartbroken but trying to be hopeful
No problem, this place helped me a lot to cope, and after reading some of the stuff people go through i kinda feel lucky i didn't have to deal with half the crappy stuff others have. But mostly reading through other people stuff and seeing the advise they were getting kinda gave me good signs and stuff to keep on eye out for. The coping with infidelity area was a good area to get that stuff from.
But with advice on what to watch out for to tell you the truth, you seem like you have a good idea on what to watch out for. I don't have much of a back story to go off of with your situation. I see she said she confessed after the guy pushed her. I don't know if she stays at home or works. People usually suggest putting a VAR hidden in the car and the most obvious places were she could possibly talk to him privately. I could not follow this advice, my wife's interactions were all on her phone, through face book and text messages that she would delete. She never called the guy so VAR's wouldn't of work for me. VAR is a voice activated recorder just in case you didn't now. There not to bad to find, Amazon, Radio shack, Best Buy.
But most the time id see people say just go off your gut. That is usually never wrong. You know you wife's habits and moods and such. So staying aware is about all you can do. But like you said her going off and crying was a good indicator. When you noticed that did you console her in any way after the fact? Just curious.
It is funny how you said its like i know you, it was striking when you said that you tell your wife how sexy she is and compliment her and all that stuff, but she never does it back and it hurts your feeling. I was and am going through the same thing. I do need to hear it though cause ive always dealt with appearance self esteem issues. But since my wife and i are communicating more and breaking down this non communication brick wall we had, i did tell her it would be nice to hear a occasional compliment. So she has worked on that. But unlike you i was letting myself go a bit, so i had to get active again and healthy.
But any way you sound like a good guy, you just got to comfortable that something like this would never happen to you i know i did, so like me you just started taking everything for granted.
By the way reading back i never answered your question about my opinion of the guy and what he said. First off any guy who would allow them self to get involved with a married woman, says to me scum, no morals ect. With him demanding your wife to tell you, makes him sound like a control freak in a way. He was probably hoping that would encourage you to leave her ect. There was definitely a hidden agenda he had brewing. But you are spot on with your opinion.
Last edited by ody360; 02-27-2013 at 02:28 PM.