Husband addicted to dating websites.
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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Focused Topics »Relationships and Addiction » Husband addicted to dating websites.

Relationships and Addiction Whether it's drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex, pornography, or anything else, addictions can be detrimental to the health of a relationship.

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Old 09-21-2010, 06:35 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Husband addicted to dating websites.

I've been with my husband for 18 years, married 12 years and we have 4 children together. Eldest is 13 and youngest is 1 year. 2 months ago he joined a dating website under several different usernames. He actually met up with 1 woman her met on there and slept with her. I have the proof and when i confronted him he denied everything and i got the blame for snooping behind his back. We aggreed to make a go of things and he'd stop the sites. 2 weeks later i've just found he's back on the dating site under another new name. IF i confront him he'll know i've been spying on him again. I still love him dearly but i don't know how to go on. I still love him. This is such a mess.
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Old 09-21-2010, 07:41 AM   #2 (permalink)
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My husband had the same problem before. I caught him more than 10 times. Now my husband completedly stopped.
It's kinda seek & hide games of the husbands.
I can share with you how I dealt with it. If you're interested.
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Old 09-22-2010, 10:18 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

He isn't addicted to dating websites, he's looking to cheat (and already has). If he didn't lose your trust, you wouldn't have been checking up on him.

Your health is at risk because of STD's. You both should be checked and see a marriage counselor.
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Old 09-22-2010, 11:13 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

You've got a much bigger problem than an addicted husband. You've got an unfaithful husband! At this point you have every right to snoop. Here's a link to a great web site: Just Found Out!
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Old 09-23-2010, 01:28 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

I have the same problem. My husband has some profiles in several dating website. Not sure why he did that. When I ask him why he puts his profile in the dating website and put his status as single, he only said that he is looking for friendship only. I didn't believe it all. But I didn't say anything. I guess I just don't want to have argument about this.

I think you have every right to spy on him because he makes you not trusting him. I understand how you feel since I have been in your situation and sadly I still am. The only difference is my husband does not see or meet them or even sleeping with the. so I am safe for now.
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Old 09-23-2010, 06:46 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

Please go to my thread, http://talkaboutmarriage.com/dating-...e-married.html, to see the flip-side of what your husbands are doing. Trust me they aren't being so innocent when they have a dating site profile. They are looking for more than a friendship. I take that back. The married ones I've had contact with want to skip the friendship part and go straight to bed. Ladies please don't be fooled!
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Old 09-27-2010, 05:04 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

Scary. I have found history of my H being on dating websites. He says it was something he was on years ago and he got an email from it. Understandable because I get crap email like that too. However, it only shows up in the computer history if you click on the email link. I think he is interested in who is emailing him on that site from an old profile he had. That's how they hook you. What have you done?
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Old 05-12-2014, 02:49 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

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Originally Posted by betster11 View Post
I've been with my husband for 18 years, married 12 years and we have 4 children together. Eldest is 13 and youngest is 1 year. 2 months ago he joined a dating website under several different usernames. He actually met up with 1 woman her met on there and slept with her. I have the proof and when i confronted him he denied everything and i got the blame for snooping behind his back. We aggreed to make a go of things and he'd stop the sites. 2 weeks later i've just found he's back on the dating site under another new name. IF i confront him he'll know i've been spying on him again. I still love him dearly but i don't know how to go on. I still love him. This is such a mess.
I too have a husband who is on these dating sites. We have been married 40 years !!! He started 4 years ago. He says she is just a friend. He has spent our entire savings on this site plus run up all his credit cards to finance his chats. After a holiday in Greece last year, he left me at the airport and flew to her in the Ukraine, still telling me she means nothing to him !! He bought her perfume and soap. He just left me at the airport, didnt even tell me where he was going to !! He says he hasnt changed towards me. I cant keep up with his lies and secrecy and honestly dont know where to go from here. He refuses to stop writing to her. I know the girls on this Russian site are trained well, they are very clever and keep the men chatting to make them spend more. The site is a scam. Can anyone throw light on what I should do.....I dont have the means to leave. Must I just put up with his behaviour and live a seperate life ?
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Old 05-12-2014, 02:51 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

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I too have a husband who is on these dating sites. We have been married 40 years !!! He started 4 years ago. He says she is just a friend. He has spent our entire savings on this site plus run up all his credit cards to finance his chats. After a holiday in Greece last year, he left me at the airport and flew to her in the Ukraine, still telling me she means nothing to him !! He bought her perfume and soap. He just left me at the airport, didnt even tell me where he was going to !! He says he hasnt changed towards me. I cant keep up with his lies and secrecy and honestly dont know where to go from here. He refuses to stop writing to her. I know the girls on this Russian site are trained well, they are very clever and keep the men chatting to make them spend more. The site is a scam. Can anyone throw light on what I should do.....I dont have the means to leave. Must I just put up with his behaviour and live a seperate life ?
I suggest you start your own thread - this one will be locked for being bumped after it's been inactive for over 3 years.
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Old 05-12-2014, 03:01 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

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Originally Posted by friendly View Post
My husband had the same problem before. I caught him more than 10 times. Now my husband completedly stopped.
It's kinda seek & hide games of the husbands.
I can share with you how I dealt with it. If you're interested.
Posted via Mobile Device
I am very interested how you stopped it - you have succeeded where I failed
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Old 05-12-2014, 03:06 PM   #11 (permalink)
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I suggest you start your own thread - this one will be locked for being bumped after it's been inactive for over 3 years.
Thank you - how do I start a new thread...sorry to be such a dunce
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Old 05-12-2014, 03:09 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

The only person that can stop it is him. I cant see why you would want a way to make him stop, if he does not do it for himself, and because he wants to, then hes not worth it.

I would not want a husband that felt it Okay to be on a dating site. Why would he feel the need if hes married and already has someone.
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Old 05-12-2014, 03:09 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

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Originally Posted by Pokie View Post
Thank you - how do I start a new thread...sorry to be such a dunce
Go to the section you want to post in (in this case, I recommend Coping with Infidelity) and scroll to the very bottom where you will see the icon to post a new thread.
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Old 05-13-2014, 01:18 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

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Originally Posted by Hope1964 View Post
Go to the section you want to post in (in this case, I recommend Coping with Infidelity) and scroll to the very bottom where you will see the icon to post a new thread.
Thank you
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Old 05-13-2014, 01:34 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: Husband addicted to dating websites.

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The only person that can stop it is him. I cant see why you would want a way to make him stop, if he does not do it for himself, and because he wants to, then hes not worth it.

I would not want a husband that felt it Okay to be on a dating site. Why would he feel the need if hes married and already has someone.
But he says he cant see anything wrong with what hes doing ! Hes just writing to a friend ! But its the site shes on. Its also a very expensive site. And he says he hasnt changed towards me ! He refuses to stop. What must I do ?
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