stepmomandwife08

As Im looking through these threads and i see alot of people saying how bad porn is and ive seen people say porn isnt a bad thing...Why is porn bad?!? I honestly dont have an issue with my husband having or watching porn....But I just never understood why it can be a big issue to some people.So I want to hear both sides..why its bad and why its good.

voivod

kinda eye of the beholder in my opinion. a case can be made that it's exploitive. it can be degrading to some, it does tend to minimize the "love" part of sex. it can be addictive and take away from a relationship. no different, i suppose than any other addiction. it costs money, it can jeopardize your standing in the community, children can be negatively affected by it.

ask someone why guns are bad, booze is bad, technology is bad, politicians are bad. someone can give you a list. so far as porn, it appeals to the prurient interset of a society, therefore it's more's (MOR-ays) are lowered. not a good starting point for a law-abiding society.

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stumped

I agree with the above post.
I dont have a problem with my man looking at porn as long as it doesnt effect our sexual relationship then it doesnt bother me. Sometimes its fun to get new ideas from porn and you can watch it together for added fun.

stepmomandwife08

I agree with that too..If he starts not wanting sex and i find him looking at porn then im not going to a happy girl..

Blanca

I think its wrong b/c of the way its filmed. There are naked people standing around having sex while other people watch and film it. Just thinking about the production aspect of it, and what those people do to each other, without even knowing each other, is just wrong in my opinion.

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stepmomandwife08

I personally think that making a porn would be fun.I think its cool that people can be comfortable in their skin and their sexuality.But I am a very sexual person so that might just be me just because I love sex lol

Earthmother1970

My husband crossed that line. Spent all his time loving himself up with the Palm Sisters and some internet porn fun. When eventually confronted, he said it was because I had "let myself go" and seemed to be tired all the time.
At that point, I had only recently managed to get my severe asthma ( serious enough that walking up a set of stairs involved stopping halfway up) and was practically single handedly taking care of the 3 children we then had ( we now have 4.) I was on the go from early in the morning until 10 or later at night.
Although we obviously had sex at least once more after the porn discovery, it was never the same afterwards. He had promised he would stop watching it, but that didn't last for long. He had taken me for granted for years. Criticised and corrected me. Nothing ever seemed to be good enough....well, there were a number of issues which left me feeling miserable, trapped, and hating the person I had become. But the porn was the beginning of the end.
I now want a seperation, which he says if I follow through on, will esult in a divorce as far as he is concerned, as he will want to move on with his life either as a single man or find somebody else. I still want to seperate, regardless.

draconis

I don't care if my wife has a drink of alcohol but she is not an alcoholic either.

Besides the fact some women and men find it religiously objectionable, others have moral issues with it.

Most however dislike the addition aspect of it, that a guy or gal will forsake sex to watch and perform to porn. Further it cuts into any and all social time for some that are addicted, one person on here (I think) her husband got fired for watching it at work, so it became a financial strain.

draconis

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GAsoccerman

I can understand both sides of the argument.

As drac said, some people do not like it for their own moral and religious issues.

Some ment for whatever reason like porn more then their wives, but porn is the outlet there is usually more to the marriage issue, more of a deeper issue.

Now I am in the "pro-porn" corner, I like to watch some of it, but also found we like to do do our (my wife and I) own photoshoots, I like photography and have taken some very nice pics of my wife. It's mor artistic then porn pics.

But we have also made our own movies, and my wife has made some "solo" movies for me on her day off.

I will watch my wife's video 100X more then any other porn.

They say a good porn for women is "the Pirates" movie with Jessie Jane. We ahve the rated R version, but thee is a X version out there, and from what I understand the majority of women like it, because it has a "script" and not just sex.

But really it is a personal opinion. Often women compare their bodies to the porn actors trying to figure out what "they are missing" and what their husbands are looking for. When it reality we could care less. If I tried to compare myself to a man in a porn, I would never "measure up" those are special men...lol

Amplexor

OK I’ll bite and post my standard (modified) rant here.

I will get up on my soap box again and point out that we have seen many come here hurt because of a spouse’s use of porn. I used porn briefly as a “release” a couple of years ago and it definitely hurt my marriage. There where other issues also but the porn had an impact. For those of you out there who are engaged in using pornography, think about the impact it could have on your spouse’s feelings. If they have self confidence issues about their looks, weight or sexual abilities, finding out will exacerbate them. It could leave them feeling unloved and undesired. Especially if the porn has replaced much of the couples’ sexual intimacy. Your spouse may also wonder what you are bringing to the bed with you when you are making love. Who or what you may have seen on line that you are thinking about when you make love to them. Put yourself in their place and how you’d feel if they did the same to you. I don’t know if I can classify the use of porn as “cheating” but it can definitely hurt your spouse and that is wrong in any form. If both spouses are OK with it or share it together, that’s fine. Consenting adults and all and I have no problem with that from a marriage standpoint. But I do have a problem with it from a moral and social standpoint. I am not a prude or holy-roller by any stretch but I do believe that making love is supposed to be between two loving people in a committed relationship. Not something to be filmed for the almighty dollar and the entertainment of others. Porn hurts lots of people. The young man or woman at a college party that gets drunk and does something stupid while some perv videos it and sells it online for a hundred bucks. It will no doubt be an act they will regret for the rest of their lives. The porn industry uses people then tosses them aside like a used condom when they have served their purposes. There are very few Jenna Jamison stories of wealth and celebrity status. Not to mention the many who leave the “business” diseased, addicted and broken. It pollutes the minds of our young people and desensitizes them to what making love is all about. It sets unobtainable expectations for them in choosing a mate and partner. It exposes them to acts of violence, incest and rape and presents it as “normal” with selections like menu items at a diner. Point and click for your selected debauchery. It is a pollutant in our moral fiber and it is available 24X7 on virtually every device connected to the Internet. Some on this forum disagree with me that it isn’t just a trivial “release” for someone to engage in. That’s fine, we are all entitled to our opinions, but we have seen many on this forum who have suffered from it. Lost their marriage, their love, their money, their trust, their self esteem, their job… OK, I’m done.

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Blanca

Ya, maybe. but i think if you actually did it, had people handling you all the time and strange guys banging you all the time, you'd start to feel differently. but then, maybe not.

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martino

I'm neither for it or against it, depends on how it is used or abused. Depends on the porn too, some is super degrading yet some is geared towards couples with story lines and women being respected (these are often directed by women.) Another point is what a long time director said: "Men are into porn to watch the things their wife will not do and fantasize about it." Just some obesrvations.

MarkTwain

I prefer to read kinky erotic stories that cater to my "interests" rather than watch porn, what does everybody think about that?

I find that porn gets boring very quickly because they never bother to set the mood up to my exacting standards, it's all just visual, and I'm not visual.

draconis

To me I don't see a difference in erotic stores and porn to tell you the truth.

draconis

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MarkTwain

You have a point Drac - except that no one gets exploited in the making of the stories, nor does any money change hands - I read the free ones on the web.

So you think it is wrong?