Dating a girl with a Weed addiction. - Talk About Marriage
Relationships and Addiction Whether it's drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex, pornography, or anything else, addictions can be detrimental to the health of a relationship.

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post #1 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 02:48 PM Thread Starter
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Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

Any advice you can give? She smokes prob a 1/2 oz of weed every 10 days.

I smoke too but maybe a joint or 2 a week.

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post #2 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 02:57 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

Does the country you live in allow recreational use of marijuana? Do either of you qualify for medical marijuana smoking?

I'm going to assume no for both questions. Both of you needs to stop using illegal substance. Police record is not good for the relationship.

I thought you couldn't get addicted to weed? Hmm.
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post #3 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 02:59 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

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Originally Posted by KillerClown View Post
Does the country you live in allow recreational use of marijuana? Do either of you qualify for medical marijuana smoking?

I'm going to assume no for both questions. Both of you needs to stop using illegal substance. Police record is not good for the relationship.

I thought you couldn't get addicted to weed? Hmm.
Maybe they live in Colorado or Washington state
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post #4 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 03:01 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

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Maybe they live in Colorado or Washington state
Maybe they live in Holland? That's Why I asked the question.

Did you have a response for the OP?
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post #5 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 03:02 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

That's a lot of freaking herb! How does she function?
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post #6 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 03:09 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

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That's a lot of freaking herb! How does she function?
It is? Good thing somebody knows.
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post #7 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 03:23 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

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That's a lot of freaking herb! How does she function?
Probably does the wake and bake then maintains all day.

Big question is why does she use so heavily? And does she every 'sober up' or is she always high?

If she is always high, and has been for a long time, don't expect her to change. It's the way she has learned to live her life. Don't have kids, and don't operate heavy machinery.
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post #8 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 03:24 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

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Any advice you can give? She smokes prob a 1/2 oz of weed every 10 days.

I smoke too but maybe a joint or 2 a week.
Enjoy the sex? Every woman I have ever talked to said weed makes them horny. OTOH you can't make some break an addiction unless they want to break the addiction. You might try talking to her, but if she doesn't think it is a problem then you either have to live with it or walk away.

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post #9 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 03:31 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

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It is? Good thing somebody knows.
For the official record.......I had to look it up on google.
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post #10 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 03:39 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

Quote:
Originally Posted by KillerClown View Post
Does the country you live in allow recreational use of marijuana? Do either of you qualify for medical marijuana smoking?

I'm going to assume no for both questions. Both of you needs to stop using illegal substance. Police record is not good for the relationship.

I thought you couldn't get addicted to weed? Hmm.
it is not legal....yet

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post #11 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 03:41 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

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Originally Posted by Acoa View Post
Probably does the wake and bake then maintains all day.

Big question is why does she use so heavily? And does she every 'sober up' or is she always high?

If she is always high, and has been for a long time, don't expect her to change. It's the way she has learned to live her life. Don't have kids, and don't operate heavy machinery.
She has been smoking like this for years, its a way of life for her. Kids are off the table as neither of us really want it.

She does sober up but for the most part remains stoned. However, her being stoned is not like me being stoned. She can and does function like quite well

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post #12 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 03:42 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

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Enjoy the sex? Every woman I have ever talked to said weed makes them horny. OTOH you can't make some break an addiction unless they want to break the addiction. You might try talking to her, but if she doesn't think it is a problem then you either have to live with it or walk away.
She is not breaking this addictioan. I am not asking her too. I am asking:

1- Any tips on how to co-exists

2- Is a LTR possible in these conditions?

"When people show you who they are, believe them!"- RTZ
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post #13 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 03:46 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

It's over a pound per year, which seems like a hell of a lot to me. I haven't bought the stuff in 25 years or more, but I bet we're talking about a hell of a lot of money, too.

How do you feel about that being part of your life? I wouldn't, but maybe you're okay with it. Are you?
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post #14 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 04:00 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

my ex used to smoke like that.
they say you can't get addicted, fine. maybe you can't. but when you get to a place where you are high whenever possible, get high before all meals, get high and fall asleep, wake and bake. You being high becomes your dominant personality, and your real personality is suppressed.
The children and I also experienced Very angry moods when he would run out, or if we didn't have money for more.
We couldn't save any money, if there was any left after bills, he would buy extra. Sometimes he would buy extra instead of paying bills.
We didn't spend any time together on the weekends. Him smoking, me with the kids. It forced me to be the on call parent. basically, a single parent since i didn't want him looking after the children high and he was always high. He says he is high energy when he smokes at work, maybe, but when he was at home his defaults were snacking/tv/sleeping/wanting to have long philosophical conversations. He gained 75lbs, and never wanted to have sex. When he did, he wanted to be the bottom, and just lay there like a starfish. or receive a bj and then fall asleep.
He quit several months ago, and he's like a different person. lost a bunch of weight, can carry on an interesting conversation, not always sleeping, calls the kids and pays attention to them.

my sister just broke up with her longtime boyfriend (7 years) because of some of the same things. not working, smoking all the time, smoking up all their extra money, leaving her with all the responsibilities of the children.

my brother and his wife are divorced. They partied together, got married, and when she got pregnant(unintentionally), she straightened up and he didn't. Always high. He badgered her to lose the baby weight so she would leave him with their daughter and go to the gym. He would get high and fall asleep while he was supposed to be watching her. They didn't divorce over this solely, he's a sh!tty person. But it was a factor.

When we were just dating, before kids, we would smoke together sometimes. and it was fun, but for me it was something to do at parties or on holidays. not a way of life.
They say not to continue to date or have sex with anyone you wouldn't marry/have kids with, and it's true. We were just having fun together until a condom broke. Then all the sudden it's serious and you're parents. The smell made me nauseous while i was pregnant, and i tried it again after our first was born (she was with a babysitter). It was horrible. it made me panicked and paranoid.

Anyway. I might be biased by my personal experience. I couldn't stand the smell anymore and i didn't like being high. He still did, and so it divided us, and him from our children.

The other side of the coin: The ex has friends, a couple with children. They both smoke weed, always have, in their house, around their children, while she was pregnant, etc. They seem ok with their lives.

It all depends on how you see yourself long term. Do you enjoy her company when she is high and you are not and vice versa? Do you want to be smoking in 5 or 10 years at the same level? Will she? If you get married and/or have a baby will you want her to change, and/or will she want to change? Will your differing opinions be divisive?

Edited to add:
If you are really serious about not having children, then might i suggest being very careful with the birth control. like 2 kinds of bc careful. Of those couple i mentioned, myself, my brother, my adoptive sister, none of us intended to have children.

Forget enough to get over it, remember enough so it doesn't happen again.

Last edited by sixty-eight; 09-08-2016 at 05:07 PM.
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post #15 of 78 (permalink) Old 09-08-2016, 04:11 PM
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Re: Dating a girl with a Weed addiction.

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Originally Posted by unbe View Post
She is not breaking this addictioan. I am not asking her too. I am asking:

1- Any tips on how to co-exists

2- Is a LTR possible in these conditions?
Don't lose yourself in her addiction. It would be easy over time for you to start using more. Be aware and only use when you would have previously.

Be ready for some mental or physical health issues. Pot does mess with the body and the brain and because it's banned in most places there is very little scientific data about how. Effects are not severe or obvious like they are with Meth or Heroin, but they are there.

Don't let it become an excuse for her to cross any of your boundaries. What will you do if she wants to hang out with a group of friends and get high, but you want to go home and sleep so you can get up for work? Will she skip on the night out to go home with you? Are you comfortable if she doesn't and hangs out with a group getting high?

Basically, figure out what issue freaks you out so much you don't even want to talk about it. And talk about that one first.
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