Does it ever get better? - Page 2 - Talk About Marriage
Relationships and Addiction Whether it's drugs, alcohol, gambling, sex, pornography, or anything else, addictions can be detrimental to the health of a relationship.

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post #16 of 17 (permalink) Old 01-05-2017, 08:53 AM Thread Starter
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Join Date: Jul 2016
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Re: Does it ever get better?

Originally Posted by jld View Post
Does he know this? Have you told it to him just this clearly and specifically?
Yes, he know how much he has hurt me and how this has caused me to lose respect and trust for him. He realizes now how much damage he has done to me and our marriage with his lack of communication for his wants and needs. I have once ever seen my husband cry once in the 20 years we have been together and this time he has shown me more honest remorse and anger at himself for what he has done.

Even with all the changes and the work we have done i am still unsure if our marriage will succeed. I am still having a hard time trusting again and it's not fair to me to go one constantly suspicious of what he is doing and it's not fair to him. It breaks my heart that this mistake of his might destroy a great marriage and family, but i have to be able to wake up every morning and look myself in the mirror and be able to look him in the eyes and truly trust and respect him. Trust is hard to repair once broken...
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post #17 of 17 (permalink) Old 03-22-2017, 02:43 PM
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Re: Does it ever get better?

I am suffering as the wife of a porn addict. We've been married for 19 years. I always knew he looked at, but just recently I learned how bad the addiction can be The hardest part for me was that is an addiction and serious one. I chose to leave him prior to really understanding his addiction. We based the separation as just growing apart as we got older. Now I have been doing a lot of research about it and also have an appointment to seek my own therapy. This addiction crushed my world. I truly believe it as the root cause of our growing apart. I confronted him with the realization the other day for the first time and called him the addict. He did not disagree with me, but he showed no remorse for my pain I was sharing with him. Now I try to talk to him about it, calmly, friendly and he just shuts me out. He will not admit his complete addiction or even say that he is wiling to get help. He yells at my for my knowledge of the subject and tells me he will not ever talk to me about it. This is the most hurtful part is that I even though our marriage is over, I still want him to get better. He thinks his addiction is not related to our marriage issues, but everything else is. The usual fights about money, kids, vacations, etc. That is why I am seeking help for myself and try to keep strong enough to move on in my "golden" years. Good luck, but remember that porn is an addiction for most men and is a very deep rooted demon.
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