Over the past few months I know I have had times where I have struggled with this one. I have shown myself the ability to go a few days without a drink at all and then some days where I only have one drink. But for much of the time it is 2 or 3 drinks a day/night. For the past month I have been being much healthier in my diet. With that I have been able to cut the drinking down some as well.
gbrad...hi. If I am hearing you, you don't think you are alcohol dependent (yet), you are doing some secretive drinking, and would like to reduce the amount you're drinking and (go back?) to a more moderate type of drinking?
If so...I invite you to look into The Sinclair Method. This involves a medication called Naltrexone (or Nalmefene, if you prefer). In a nutshell, its a form of pharmocological extinction that requires *only* that you take one 50 mg pill an hour before you drink, anytime you are going to drink. Thats it. One pill an hour before. You can get a script from your doctor for the med... but if you prefer not to have it on your medical records, you can also order it online.
It has a very good success rate. Americans are extremely entrenched in the 12 step model as being the only way to deal with drinking. No offense to the many wonderful people AA has helped, no offense to the program itself. But its not the only way. (There is also Moderation Management, HARM reduction, Rational Recovery, etc) Abstinence isn't the answer for everyone. Only you can say.
The Sinclair Method has successfully helped people go back to a time before they became concerned and to drink less overall, less per session and remove cravings. Its also helped those who wished to become abstinent..to do so.