Newly married to a preacher...HELP!!!
I married a preacher 3months ago,we both were single parents raised our girls,we both remained single for about17 years before we found each other. We dated about 6 months before getting married.He was WONDERFUL sweet,kind,loving,supportive,fun.Then we got married...he began screaming at me,threatning me,REFUSED TO HELP WITH ANYTHING.I have my own business and a horse ranch all I had BEFORE we married, I am a busy woman, a happy person, that gets up everyday ready to see what the day will bring!!! He was constantly on the computer literally for hours and hours and hours he wouldnt come to bed sometimes! but we were working things out I thought.Then HIS daughter moved in exactly 4 weeks after we were married, she is 23 pregnant,has twin 3 year olds has no drivers license or car.I was expected to take her everywhere,do everything, she wouldnt help,she slept ALL DAY and expected me to watch the girls!!! I couldnt take it!! I tried talking to him, and frankly I wanted her gone!! Once she got money and her inlaws said they would give her an apartment I was happy and said "great,when does she move" he screamed at me.That it was his blood, blah blah I told him I'm not used to all this chaos, the girl was telling me she was going to give her baby my husbands last name because "he always wanted a boy,and you can't give him one" man that hurt,not to mention weird. She also told me that she"would make sure her daddy had what he needed before her husband" again I was shocked!! I said "well it must be a relief to you that your dad now has a wife to take care of him,now you can focus on your husband" she then replied "you know I have always gotten rid of all my dads girlfriends, every last one, he'll do what I say" again kinda sick. Well needless to say things just steadily got worse by the hour, until I suggested we go to marriage counselling, he said "they couldnt tell him anything he couldnt find in the bible" . She then approached me and said "she agreed with her dad she doesnt believe in marriage counciling" I knew I was in trouble. Then one day I discovered he was taking money, out of the budget, and lied about it. We had an arguement out in the car because we couldnt talk in the house(which is mine long before I ever met him)he said he would agree to go to counselling in one breath, began screaming at me, and then said "I tricked him into marrying him"THAT WAS IT!!! I jumped out of the car told him to pack his crap and his kids and get off my property!! I was done!! I feel bad, I married for life but I cant take being screamed at lied to and made to feel like I never do anything right, and certainly won't be pushed around by the two of them. I told him at one point that his daughter was no diffrent than having a 13 year old around, that was helpless I had to do everything for her, if I had known he had a 13 year old we would not be married because I raised my daughter completely on my own, I loved being a mom and was very dedicated to her,my daughter is independant,in college and happily married to just the greatest kid, that I love to death and they are expecting their first baby. I thought this was our time and I can understand helping people but when they wont help out and spend their money on new cellphones and clothes and jewelry and dont contribute, I have a problem with that. I just feel very betrayed and lied to.I miss the man i thought I married, but maybe I married someone else.He has been gone 3 weeks and not one phone call, to see if I'm alive. I have cried, lost sleep and am very depressed(which is not like me at all) I just dont know what to do! My sister wants to beat him, HIS MOTHER AND BROTHER AND THE REST OF HIS FAMILY IS ON MY SIDE!! They call everyday several times a day, they tell me he has problems and I deserve better!! I feel like I have been thrust into a tornado, please give me some advice, what do you guys think.