I actually have never read that book but I'll have to check it out. I like His Needs, Her Needs and The Complete Idiots guide to Assertiveness.
That sounds like a good one -never heard of it before, I think "His Needs/ Her Needs
" is the finest Marriage book on the Market.
I have heard you say before that having a good character eliminates the need for for the MMSLP and NMMNG stuff that a lot of the men here harp on so much.
I feel that a woman of character doesn't need to be "gamed" by her husband in order for her to be attracted to him, respect him, or to do the right thing in the relationship.
Conversely, a good man doesn't need to be "gamed" by his wife to keep him interested either.
I don't like Games at all, it leaves you "hanging"...always questioning... maybe some get off on that sort of Mystery...this would only irritate me and cause bad feelings...
I NEED openness and honesty.... My husband's temperament is naturally more passive over my own.....I guess I didn't realize HOW MUCH in our past .... He HID how much he wanted sex... and me, having my head in the clouds, on kids, on projects, a little repressed, didn't fully grasp the urgency of the Male sex drive, for all I knew, he only needed it as much as ME
.. I was ALWAYS satisfied.. so in this way we missed each other.... sometimes I feel like..... "Darn him!...why did he do that !@#$.... I had a RIGHT TO KNOW, I would have cared , he was always so good to me".
Jld said: Well, I think NMMNG is probably pretty good. As I understand it, it tells men to quit being passive-aggressive and dependent on their wives' moods. It tells them to love themselves, believe in themselves, and befriend themselves. As they get a stronger core, they can actually be the solid presence their wives need them to be.
... me & my husband went through it -about 4 yrs ago....we determined..where he was missing it... about 4 of the things listed and a few we'd call half truths...
He would have never read the book...even then he said he was "Happy"- but he could have been HAPPIER...he should have tried harder to arouse me, been more creative, more assertive....this would have benefited us both !..... Really...it was ME who WOKE UP ...changed more so....being that more attentive wife .....
He is still a hell of a good man....I guess because of how I see HIM.. I tend to get offended when I read the posts bashing these sort of men... I am looking through my own experience ....(as we so often do)
I feel women should work with their Nice men as well - to help them be better men.... we are all in this together.