Re: H's Grown Son & Pregnant Girlfriend Moved Back Home
You should not move anything to any new thread or forum! Keep it here, because this is where everyone knows the facts and circumstances.
Second, I really really really can't stress it enough that you should NOT be helping your step-son and his girlfriend get public assistance (via Section 8 HUD, welfare, food stamps, etc.). Don't put the cart before the horse! In this case, your step-son is the horse and you can't beat a dead horse. Well, lets hope that your step-son is not a dead horse; than I should say, you can only lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink from it. You should not spoon feed your step-son responsibilities that he needs to take to better himself, to live life with integrity, honor, respect for others, taking care of a family, etc. And he needs to marry his girlfriend. If he is sleeping with her and making a baby, than he best be owning up to marrying her. Again, you can just "POINT" your step-son in the right direction. It is entirely up to your step-son to take leaps and bounds and man-up and put his big boy pants on!
The idea and endevours you are taking to assist your step-son is just a means to an end. This process of helping him out just goes to get your step-son and his girlfriend out of your house, but it only serves to further enable his situation. My strong advice to you is (and I know everyone else would agree on this one), let your step-son figure out what to do on his own! He is of age and if there is any common sense or wisdom in his mind, he will figure out a way to handle this thing called life. You cannot do life for your step-son...he must do it by his own efforts and strength, with where he is today. Of course, this is not to diminish that we need to do all things through Christ, who gives us the strength to, but this is not where your step-son is at today, so you and I cannot apply that passage to him. In reality, your step-son needs to hit rock bottom of all rock bottoms. As long as people are enabling him (you, your husband, the government, etc.), HE WILL NOT LEARN THE LESSON!
The step-son and girlfriend need to be sent out on their way and you and your husband need to pray pray pray and let the Holy Spirit direct the path for your step-son and his girlfriend!
Thirdly, the prodigal son scenario doesn't really apply. In that story, it was about arrogance and pride on the son's part. Your step-son is dealing with laziness and licentious! Although there is some truth to the prodigal son that needs to take place in your step-son's life, there are far more greater things that he has to face and deal with in life. If your step-son is a backslidden Christian, I would say that 1 Corinthians 5:5 applies, "deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus." Also, 1 Corinthians 5:11, "But now I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother, who is sexually immoral, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner—not even to eat with such a person." The bottom line is, your step-son is living in sin and neither you or your husband should support that under your roof, nor should you be fellowshipping and eating with!
Fourthly, you can deal with your complacent husband by loving on him, submitting to him, respecting him! You can speak truth and wisdom by not lording over him or beating him with the Scriptures (I am NOT saying you do). Speak softly, gently, respectively, with lots of patience! In fact, let me encourage you to read 1 Corinthians 13 today and let it dwell and soak into your heart and mind by the Spirit.
I agree with some of the other posts...you need to get your husband on the same page with you and you can bring forth truth and wisdom in such a way that would resonate with him. When you share the above mentioned Scriptures with your husband, because I know you will, share it with him in a very loving and peaceful way with the utmost respect and good intentions for his son and his girlfriend. It truly is by love that you two need to turn the son over to satan for the destruction of his flesh. It is by love that you remove the leaven (sin), from within your household.
And than pray, pray, pray! And when you are done with that, continue to pray, pray, and pray!
I will be praying for you all!
Last edited by forevermemorable; 05-25-2014 at 08:12 PM.