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post #16 of 17 (permalink) Old 09-11-2015, 04:49 AM
NotEasy's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2015
Location: Australia
Posts: 542
Re: Does church address marriage issues adequately?

Two book I recommend,
"What did you expect?" by Paul David Trupp, but it is more about emotions than sex.
"Fatherhood" by Tony Payne, again not quite on your topic, but brilliant. This book probably changed my view of marriage most.

I am a Baptist, and my church stresses that church is made of sinful people trying to encourage and support each other as we grow more like God. None of us has the answers, even the pastors.

We have very independent churches, which dislike any central authority. Partly this is to prevent some fool in head office forcing us to follow some stupid idea. But also it is to have us members defend ourselves against any stupidity from our pastors. In support of this, they mentioned in sermons other churches where the pastors had affairs. They preached a biblical way to approach such problems, even how to use our church constitution to perhaps ultimately kick them out.

This church independence also means greater variety between churches. Another Baptist church may be very different to mine.

Our church refuses to accept weddings bookings from anyone who hasn't passed the pre-wedding course, which includes discussions about sex. The pastors reserve the right to delay or cancel the wedding if you fail the course. Thankfully they haven't needed to do that recently.

Then the wedding service always includes "your body is not yours, but belongs to your spouse", and "the marriage bed is pure" meaning anything done in private by a willing couple is pure or fine. The first time I heard this I was embarrassed from the couple. Now after a dozen times I realise everyone has heard it before, and also it is worth repeating.

Recently ****** Madi*** has been mentioned twice in sermons, with discussion of infidelity, sexual intimacy, emotional difficulties and that pastors are available to talk if needed. Also there was a recent sermon on the same sex marriage debate.

"Life wasn't meant to be easy;
but take heart, parts of it can be delightful."
Malcolm Fraser
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post #17 of 17 (permalink) Old 09-11-2015, 05:01 AM
SecondTime'Round's Avatar
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 4,213
Re: Does church address marriage issues adequately?

I'm not sure it's the church's role to fully address this from the pulpit. I'm not saying to completely ignore it, but there's only so much time on a Sunday morning (or Saturday night, whatever) to touch on all marriage issues. I think it is more the responsibility of the individual or couple to get connected to small groups that provide encouragement, guidance and accountability to each other.

I'm divorced and not dating, but I'm joining a 6 week women's study about insecurity this coming Sunday.
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