Has faith/religion helped your relationship? - Page 10 - Talk About Marriage
Relationships and Spirituality The place to look for faith based solutions.

User Tag List

 300Likes
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
post #136 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 12:53 PM
Member
 
inmyprime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: London
Posts: 1,294
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana7 View Post
Separate but one. The trinity. God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit.


Ah ok. This is the first time I heard someone make an attempt at explaining the trinity thing...So basically god can be anything and everything.
Then I believe!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

inmyprime is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #137 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 01:18 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,753
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by inmyprime View Post
Yes, sorry, I think it was me who posts these stats....I think one of the reasons was the fact that Christians tend to marry younger, with less education (at that moment in time) because church encourages this.
Praying for marriage to succeed is another. But then again, the same principle would apply when trying to pray away for any kind of problem rather than taking responsibility for t yourself and resolving it. I have a lot of Christian friends who put all their faith in god and get often discouraged when nothing gets fixed or done and they end up having to do things themselves.

Anyway, I don't believe in the whole soul mate thing. While I definitely would not have picked anyone else but my wife, I am not sure I can say the same about her (picking me). But one can grow closer together (or drift apart) and relationships evolve continuously. Nothing is ever static or set in stone.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
I have found its a mixture, with God doing some things without my input, and other times He works in and through me to change things. Either way He is always involved.

The reasons Christians often marry earlier is because we aren't to live together outside marriage. Having said that, my son and older step-son didn't marry till they were way past 30, both are Christians.
Diana7 is offline  
post #138 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 01:20 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,753
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by inmyprime View Post
Ah ok. This is the first time I heard someone make an attempt at explaining the trinity thing...So basically god can be anything and everything.
Then I believe!


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
I see it like an egg. You have the shell, the yoke and the white. One egg with 3 distinct parts.

This may help
https://www.gotquestions.org/Trinity-Bible.html
Diana7 is offline  
 
post #139 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 01:59 PM
Member
 
inmyprime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: London
Posts: 1,294
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana7 View Post
I believe that in church going committed Christians the divorce rate is lower. I know of so many divorces, but only a couple where both were Christians. Remember also that atheists are far more likely to live together without marriage, and those relationships are far far more likely to end than a marriage. Also people who live together before marriage are more likely to divorce than those who don't.



Christians are just as prepared for marriage as anyone else, and many go to preparation for marriage courses.



I also know marriages where one is a committed christian and one not, they are generally not happy marriages.

Maybe you should publish your own studies, based on your own hearsay :-) This does not at all seem to conform with reality from various published surveys. But ok.

Btw why are people more likely to divorce if they lived together before marriage? Is it the sex before marriage thing? I'm still of the opinion one should do a 'test drive' before marrying. It makes little sense not to. Also it is only when you actually live together, will you truly be able to find out whether you are actually compatible with each other or not. I think on balance, the studies are probably correct.




Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
inmyprime is offline  
post #140 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:07 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,753
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by inmyprime View Post
Maybe you should publish your own studies, based on your own hearsay :-) This does not at all seem to conform with reality from various published surveys. But ok.

Btw why are people more likely to divorce if they lived together before marriage? Is it the sex before marriage thing? I'm still of the opinion one should do a 'test drive' before marrying. It makes little sense not to. Also it is only when you actually live together, will you truly be able to find out whether you are actually compatible with each other or not. I think on balance, the studies are probably correct.




Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
I think its because those who don't live together first are often Christians and more committed to marriage generally. The fact that more who live together first divorce, shows that having a 'test drive' doesn't make divorce less likely.
A relative of mine tried to tell me that, 'well how do you know if you are compatible'? they said. I said it wasn't an option for us because we don't believe in sex outside marriage.
Diana7 is offline  
post #141 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:09 PM
Member
 
inmyprime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: London
Posts: 1,294
Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana7 View Post
The 77 virgins thing is pure nonsense, its an islamic belief. Their religion is very down on women, Christianity isn't. Part of me feels for those young men who blow themselves up thinking they will get that 'reward', but part of me is sickened that they even think that's what God is like. Its not. Their god is false.

Yes you are right. If you saw people on a boat heading for a massive waterfall, would you want to warn them? As Christians God tells us to tell others about Him. Its not something that is just for us, but for everyone. Its not something we are supposed to hide from others or keep to ourselves.
God hasnt made you 'not' to believe, we all have a choice to follow him or not. You can make that choice today by finding a church that runs an alpha course or similar, which is for those like you who want to know more and ask questions.

"Their god is false."

But how can you be sure that it's their god which is false and not yours? (Btw it's supposed to be all the same god, the abrahamic kind). I never understood this: one is completely pre-conditioned which god to believe in, depending on which family one gets born into. Does it not seem a tad arrogant to claim that only one god is the true god and everyone else is wrong? I'm sure there must have been wars about this....

"If you saw people on a boat heading for a massive waterfall, would you want to warn them?"

Well, it's more like a distraction with a lie :-)
We are all going down that waterfall eventually; it's the quality of the journey that counts.

"God hasnt made you 'not' to believe, we all have a choice to follow him or not. You can make that choice today by finding a church that runs an alpha course or similar, which is for those like you who want to know more and ask questions."

But i don't have a choice, that's the point . I can tell myself that there is a Christian god (or whichever kind) but I will just be lying to myself because I don't see any reason to suppose that there is anything or anyone remotely similar to what's been described in the books. 95% of the stuff in those books is contradictory and makes absolutely no sense to me :-/ I don't think the free will is a free as it is advertised to be...I am a case in point!
As for the alpha course, I'm pretty sure I will drive them insane with my questions and they will quickly lose their will to live and probably end up converting themselves to Islam or the Orbiting Teapot religion.





Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Last edited by inmyprime; 04-05-2017 at 02:29 PM.
inmyprime is offline  
post #142 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:15 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,753
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by inmyprime View Post
"Their god is false."

But how can you be sure that it's their god which is false and not yours? (Btw it's supposed to be all the same god, the abrahamic kind).

"If you saw people on a boat heading for a massive waterfall, would you want to warn them?"

Well, it's more like a distraction with a lie :-)
We are all going down that waterfall eventually; it's the quality of the journey that counts.

"God hasnt made you 'not' to believe, we all have a choice to follow him or not. You can make that choice today by finding a church that runs an alpha course or similar, which is for those like you who want to know more and ask questions."

But i don't have a choice, that's the point . I can tell myself that there is a Christian god (or whichever kind) but I will just be lying to myself because I don't see any reason to suppose that there is anything or anyone remotely similar to what's been described in the books. 95% of the stuff in those books is contradictory and makes absolutely no sense to me :-/ I don't think the free will is a free as it is advertised to be...I am a case in point!
As for the alpha course, I'm pretty sure I will drive them insane with my questions and they will quickly lose their will to live and probably end up converting themselves to Islam or the Orbiting Teapot religion.





Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
The god they worship is completely different. Their faith is completely different.
Thats what alpha is for, to ask and answer questions.
Diana7 is offline  
post #143 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:19 PM
Member
 
inmyprime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: London
Posts: 1,294
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana7 View Post
I have found its a mixture, with God doing some things without my input, and other times He works in and through me to change things. Either way He is always involved.



The reasons Christians often marry earlier is because we aren't to live together outside marriage. Having said that, my son and older step-son didn't marry till they were way past 30, both are Christians.


OTOH both me and my wife lives together before marriage, aren't Christians and still married :-) While many Christians posting here are at least on their 2nd marriage...
(Too small a sample for a study but still, according to your logic it should be reasonable anecdotal evidence...).

Why does god choose to involve himself in some things and dis-involve himself in others? Are you sure you are definitely not confusing god's involvement with coincidences and with things that don't work out a certain way (or don't make sense), then god will somehow become dis-involved?
It would be relatively easy to prove whether god is involved in things or whether your prayers have any effect with fairly high certainty. I'm pretty sure the outcome would be the same as a coin flip, implying a random coincidence. It is US, who ascribe meaning to things and tell ourselves a story of why something went one way, and not another. To me, this is as obvious as night and day.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
inmyprime is offline  
post #144 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:26 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,753
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by inmyprime View Post
OTOH both me and my wife lives together before marriage, aren't Christians and still married :-) While many Christians posting here are at least on their 2nd marriage...
(Too small a sample for a study but still, according to your logic it should be reasonable anecdotal evidence...).

Why does god choose to involve himself in some things and dis-involve himself in others? Are you sure you are definitely not confusing god's involvement with coincidences and with things that don't work out a certain way (or don't make sense), then god will somehow become dis-involved?
It would be relatively easy to prove whether god is involved in things or whether your prayers have any effect with fairly high certainty. I'm pretty sure the outcome would be the same as a coin flip, implying a random coincidence. It is US, who ascribe meaning to things and tell ourselves a story of why something went one way, and not another. To me, this is as obvious as night and day.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
If we follow Him He is involved in every part of our lives. However He doesn't treat us like little children, but lets us make our own choices and decisions, sometimes bad ones. His work in us is a joint effort, we have to be open and willing to let Him change us. I know people who were miraculously healed after prayer. I know a couple who were heavily into crime their lives changed completely after their conversion.
Diana7 is offline  
post #145 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:39 PM
Member
 
inmyprime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: London
Posts: 1,294
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana7 View Post
I think its because those who don't live together first are often Christians and more committed to marriage generally. The fact that more who live together first divorce, shows that having a 'test drive' doesn't make divorce less likely.

A relative of mine tried to tell me that, 'well how do you know if you are compatible'? they said. I said it wasn't an option for us because we don't believe in sex outside marriage.

But that's not a fact!
New studies find no correlation between living together and higher divorce rates.

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/4936928

"Itís often said that that living together before marriage puts couples at greater risk for divorce later on ó but it turns out that may not be the case at all.

A new study by associate professor Arielle Kuperberg from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro found that there is no correlation between cohabiting before marriage and divorce; instead, what may predict divorce in those who cohabitate before marriage is the age at which they choose do so."


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

inmyprime is offline  
post #146 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:42 PM
Member
 
inmyprime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: London
Posts: 1,294
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana7 View Post
I see it like an egg. You have the shell, the yoke and the white. One egg with 3 distinct parts.

This may help
https://www.gotquestions.org/Trinity-Bible.html

What's an omelette then or if it gets scrambled? I will never eat breakfast in the same way again.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
inmyprime is offline  
post #147 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:45 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,753
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by inmyprime View Post
But that's not a fact!
New studies find no correlation between living together and higher divorce rates.

New Research Says Living Together Before Marriage Doesn't Lead To Divorce | The Huffington Post

"Itís often said that that living together before marriage puts couples at greater risk for divorce later on ó but it turns out that may not be the case at all.

A new study by associate professor Arielle Kuperberg from the University of North Carolina at Greensboro found that there is no correlation between cohabiting before marriage and divorce; instead, what may predict divorce in those who cohabitate before marriage is the age at which they choose do so."


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
IT was a British study and article that I read.
Diana7 is offline  
post #148 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:46 PM
Member
 
inmyprime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: London
Posts: 1,294
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana7 View Post
The god they worship is completely different. Their faith is completely different.

Thats what alpha is for, to ask and answer questions.


Does different equal false though? This view seems to border on intolerance (i refer my honourable friend to the crusades once more...).
I wonder where this conviction comes from. Always puzzled me.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
inmyprime is offline  
post #149 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:49 PM
Member
 
inmyprime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2016
Location: London
Posts: 1,294
Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Diana7 View Post
If we follow Him He is involved in every part of our lives. However He doesn't treat us like little children, but lets us make our own choices and decisions, sometimes bad ones. His work in us is a joint effort, we have to be open and willing to let Him change us. I know people who were miraculously healed after prayer. I know a couple who were heavily into crime their lives changed completely after their conversion.


But does it matter that I know more people who prayed and got worse?
What about the dying babies from diseases or natural disasters, there is no chance free will could be made accountable for these horrors. But god has a plan for everyone, even if we never realise what it is, will probably be the response to this little dilemma.



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
inmyprime is offline  
post #150 of 379 (permalink) Old 04-05-2017, 02:50 PM
Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: UK
Posts: 1,753
Re: Has faith/religion helped your relationship?

Quote:
Originally Posted by inmyprime View Post
Does different equal false though? This view seems to border on intolerance (i refer my honourable friend to the crusades once more...).
I wonder where this conviction comes from. Always puzzled me.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
The only way we can get to God is though Jesus Christ and no no other religion believes He is who He says He is. Many muslims in the middle east are seeing dreams and vision of Jesus and converting. Its really exciting.
Diana7 is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on Talk About Marriage, you must first register. Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

Important! Your username will be visible to the public next to anything you post and could show up in search engines like Google. If you are concerned about anonymity, PLEASE choose a username that will not be recognizable to anyone you know.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools Search this Thread
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Relationship help moving in please n thx! Flower14 General Relationship Discussion 5 01-11-2016 10:26 AM
Teenage son, long distance relationship alexm The Family & Parenting Forums 11 12-16-2015 03:04 PM

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome