I agree with you, in part. I also agree with Rose.
Both the hubs and I were raised Southern Baptist...taught the wait until marriage thing but the marriage bed was scared and as long as both agreed, most sexual things were okay.
As for the man being the leader, that is very sexually arousing for many women.
I spent many years trying to be the leader because that is what I saw at home. My grandmother (who raised me) totally domineered my grandfather. That's what I knew as normal.
My hubs was the spoiled baby of the family and was perfectly content to let me be in control of the finances, fight the battles with zoning, etc, and deal with school and most other hard issues.
One day I remember telling him I was tired of being the man. He didn't get it.
In July of 2011 I had a stroke and was diagnosed with a heart issue that required open heart surgery. We had 2 kids in elementary school, a home and pets to take care of.
Did I mention I was as LD was you could get? I was so stressed and tired (and sick, but I didn't know it) that sex was the furthest thing from my mind.
At this point DH HAD to man up. He took over the bills, took over running the household, and when I came home from the hospital, he took care of me. Very well I might add.
As I recovered, my libido EXPLODED. It just wasn't that I was healthy again, it was that my man had become the leader in our home, I felt safe and secure in his leadership.
Poor guy can't get any rest now, either, because I'm always amorous