I've been married 25 years. 10 years ago my husband had an affair with my best friend. I did nothing about it for 5 months. When I knew something for sure, that there was a relationship going on I filed for divorce. 3 days after the divorce he came back apologizing and moved back home. He left again a couple weeks later and stayed out till 7 months later when he ended his relationship with my best friend. We dated and set up some boundaries and God was more a part of our lives than ever. We got remarried 3 months later.
Now it has been 5 months after my husband said he was leaving again because of a whole list of things not making him happy. I've sensed his drifting from God and have prayed earnestly for him. He has not filed for divorce but has admitted to a "friendship" with some woman. After 5 months I've finally discovered who it is and that he stays overnight with her. I'm willing to be patient with God who knows all things, but knowing what the Bible says is it right to not confront him that I know about this relationship?
I'd like to hear from someone who has been the betrayer and what would be the most loving God-willed action at this point
Scripture says that when someone has sinned against us, go to them and address the manner. If your brother does not amend his ways, bring in another person.
When I was informed of my husband's affair, although it had been over for a while, I also brought in another person in that situation, because I felt for true change to be permanent, there needed to be accountability to someone in addition to myself.
Scripture says that when someone has sinned against us, go to them and address the manner. If your brother does not amend his ways, bring in another person.
When I was informed of my husband's affair, although it had been over for a while, I also brought in another person in that situation, because I felt for true change to be permanent, there needed to be accountability to someone in addition to myself.
God says retribution is His, should I wait to confront to show patience for God's will? I never felt right about filing for divorce last time. Something is holding me back from filing this time. I told my h I wasn't going to file (we have been separated 5 months). He has not filed. I know he is trying to protect his cheating life and also trying to be nice to me! Guess the guilt is driving him to be that way.
God says retribution is His, should I wait to confront to show patience for God's will? I never felt right about filing for divorce last time. Something is holding me back from filing this time. I told my h I wasn't going to file (we have been separated 5 months). He has not filed. I know he is trying to protect his cheating life and also trying to be nice to me! Guess the guilt is driving him to be that way.
I have done it all. I see escorts from time to time. So, yes, I am a betrayer. As far as waiting on god, your wasting your time. Dump religion and you dump your guilt.
I dont believe in any kind of diety, especially one who keeps attendance. I do believe Jesus was a good man who died for a principal. . . Be Nice. But he was no god.
"I hate to twist your mind, but god aint on your side!"
I really don't see what religion has to do with your situation - if he keeps cheating then surely you're just not fulfilling each other's needs (not sexual needs necessarily, I am talking general needs - emotional etc.)
I think you're delaying things and wasting your own time - confront him and give him an ultimatum - if this can't be fixed then you need to go your separate ways, if it can then he needs to commit to you 100%!
You have clear Scriptural permission to get out of this marriage. The question you need to ask yourself is the old Dear Abby one: Are you better with him or without him?
For God to be in your marriage, both of you need to care about that. Your H clearly does not. Find someone who will, or go your own way, but stop wasting the life God gave you on a man who cheats on you.
I've been married 25 years. 10 years ago my husband had an affair with my best friend. I did nothing about it for 5 months. When I knew something for sure, that there was a relationship going on I filed for divorce. 3 days after the divorce he came back apologizing and moved back home. He left again a couple weeks later and stayed out till 7 months later when he ended his relationship with my best friend. We dated and set up some boundaries and God was more a part of our lives than ever. We got remarried 3 months later.
Now it has been 5 months after my husband said he was leaving again because of a whole list of things not making him happy. I've sensed his drifting from God and have prayed earnestly for him. He has not filed for divorce but has admitted to a "friendship" with some woman. After 5 months I've finally discovered who it is and that he stays overnight with her. I'm willing to be patient with God who knows all things, but knowing what the Bible says is it right to not confront him that I know about this relationship?
I'd like to hear from someone who has been the betrayer and what would be the most loving God-willed action at this point
The least he could do is not put it on you as if you're making him unhappy if that is the case. He left you, but came back only to leave 7 months ---- sounds like he is trying to keep you from moving on but wanting to have a full blown affair and another life and partner down the street round the corner. What he SHOULD do is tell you that he is not good enough for you and you deserve better.
He should tell you that he is a man not able to be faithful to you and wants to be with other women. He should say that he'd rather leave you before he takes for granted what he has taken since you two have been married.
He wants to leave - let him go. He seems to want to play for about a year and come on back home. That is not ok
Christians who stray from their marriage will rarely change their behavior to "get right with God" or because they want to start living right. They cheated in the first place because their morals and values are all screwed up. Therefore their spirituality was a big joke the whole time and it will probably never mean anything to them. People rarely change. Maybe in a few years you will have someone better and THAT will be the answer to your prayers.
You think a God who loves you and thinks you are fit to be his bride would want you to stay in your marriage?
What advice would you give to your child in the same situation, to continue being used and mistreated? If you, being of the flesh, would want your child to be treated properly and be happy, how much more does God want for you?
You are a child of the king, no heir to royalty would tolerate this behavior. Stop believing that you are not worthy of respect, admiration, and loyalty.
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Waiting for God to work in my marriage 
