12-04-2011, 07:49 PM
Join Date: Oct 2009
Location: florida usa
| | Re: sexless marriage
methinks u marr'd the wrong man, my daughter/friend....not that emotional miracles arent possible here.
Originally Posted by sofie
I'm married to the love of my life for about 8 years.
The first few years my husband was very interested in me and we had a lot of sex, although I didn't succeed in making it a really deep emotional bonding.
After the first few years his interest declined rapidly.
He did have some problems with ED and surgery but that is not what holds him back. He says he is getting old, there is more to life than sex, but he's just not interested in me. When now and then we do have sex, it's just sex and only for him. He does watch porn although he knows how humiliating that is for me, on top of being rejected.
He says religion is more important. He goes to church he is a newly converted mormon, I do not although I believe in God, he says that I should go to church if I really belief
Even that can have nothing to do with it, the mormon belief has nothing against sex with the spouse, and the lack of sex was already there before he converted. In fact I hoped that we would get closer, that he would honor me more as his spouse and turn away from porn.
I see sex in marriage as something that bonds two people, gives them a chance to open up, dare to be vonurable and please each other with out shame.
When I bring it up he makes it cheap, as if I always want "sex". I don't "always" and when it is toally focused on him, connecting and giving and getting love.
Any input on this? Please?
i'd advise u find a way to compromise by lowering yer libido and raising his by taking chailles advice & raising the intimacy stakes with H. Read up on the 'nets offerings on just how to best go about doing that. hope u know yer H well enuff.
methinks that along with prayer, once u increase the intimacy
u'll be better off with H cuz he'll drop the porn most likely out of love (or guilt, 2nd or last choice/reason) which in most folks cases is a problem for (truly) one or both parties (long term, or to be manifested somewhere down the line; if they're honest with themselves as religious thought goes) many a man/woman can relate to this song; hope u have speakers & a media player for this song on YouTube;
its a lament many H/W's have sung alone, in the car, the kitchen, or the bedroom......sigh. Where Were You When I Was Falling In Love - (re-posted) - YouTube
[Mormons on the internet? who'da thunk it?!----just j/k]