I am a 50 plus year old male and we have been married a LONG time. Together well over 25 years. We drifted and drifted apart. I have some "traits"/actions she did not like. Never cheated though ... no affairs.
After ignoring some warning signs, she said that's, I want a divorce. I acted the part of the wronged husband ... "why are you doing this to me? I still love you" ... you get the drift.
The divorce was in full progress ... two attorneys, proposal to split up money and other things, sell the house. There was zero hope for saving the marriage.
I came across "Stop Your Divorce" in December. The recommendations are counter intuitive. For example, "if you want her, don't tell her that" and many more actions that are really negative.
As I read the book, I took the recommendations to heart and truly believed them. For example, she WAS correct in filing ... I would have divorced myself. I told her she was correct. And said a lot more. Within two days after taking a radical turn in behavior, she started to change. After a month, we are no longer getting divorced.
This is absolutely true. How it will end, I do not know. Mr. McDonald is not a good write, he is repetitive, and very simplistic. To me, simple solutions are the best.
Mr. McDonald the teachings of Doctor Albert Ellis. It is a therapy called Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT). He applies the therapy to the divorce situation.
I can attest to its effectiveness. The reader has to accept his premises, and be able to acknowledge their approach is wrong and change. Ultimately, the other spouse has to have some interest in maintaining the relationship.
I do not recommend things lightly. The person above said it was a scam, and the guy is not licensed. So what? Bill Gates of Microsoft never got a degree. Rush Limbaugh has no degree. If something works, it works! REBT is basically a therapy based on personal responsibility. You are responsible for what happens to you. It makes sense to me.
Please remember that you must follow recommendations and not just give lip service. This will be the best $80 you ever spent ... that is the cost of his electronic book. Get it and read it.
I can confirm that Homer McDonald is the real thing, not a scam. I'm his son Russel McDonald, and he's been saving marriages and helping people my entire life, and I'm 49.
He has had great and wonderful success in helping people going through relationship problems. I've been happily married now for 15 years, but I practiced some of his techniques with a previous girlfriend and it worked so fast I almost got whiplash. Basically I had been dating a woman for several months when she said "I'm not sure about us, I think we've been moving too fast" or something along that lines. I IMMEDIATELY and without any expressed worry or concern in my voice said "you know I'm thinking the same thing. I think it would be better if we didn't move so fast and took some time to ourselves". And within ONE second the whole issue was over. Her very next words were "WHAT, but why??? I thought we were doing so well..." and so on. She was hanging all over me just about trying to convince me things were fine. The important part is, if she had the concern, then there WAS something there, and I want to agree with reality, not be in denial. I didn't run away, and I didn't try to pull her back. Instead I just matched her thoughts exactly and supported her. I wanted the best for her.
So I'd definitely recommend getting his book. It is full of good advice and information like the above. Paying $80 for 50 years of experience is an easy decision. Anyhow, there is Homer McDonald's own son's testimonial. Hope that helps.
Thanks so much Nowahappyguy.
Yeah, I spent the money Russel, but I checked out about the point where a bribe was suggested. Bribe her with money to keep her?!?! that's from 50 years experience? Where was the suggestion that I tie her up and keep her in the basement (against her will heh-heh). Heck I'm willing to try anything but the bribe suggestion lost me. Explain.
I bought the ebook back in 2004 -- I think it was about $20 or $30 cheaper at the time (which is closer to a fair price, 50 years experience or not) -- but otherwise, the advertising website hasn't changed. I was impressed (and still am) with how much useful information the site itself contained. Anyway, I wasn't ultimately able to prevent my divorce with it (which in retrospect, given the situation I was in, ended up being a good thing) -- not sure how much of that was due to my application of his recommended techniques (some of which are difficult to pull off when you're in that place of post-divorce-onset misery). Nevertheless, the book was a welcome companion when I was feeling all that loneliness and desperation and need for advice. A fair bit of the book's wisdom is helpful in non-divorce-threatened relationships also. I believe Mr. McDonald imparts useful wisdom, poorly-written, though it is. The book reads like he dictated much of it -- just following his stream of consciousness -- into a tape recorder and then had it typed verbatim, without much further editing. I didn't generally mind that, however -- it just felt conversational, like he was talking to me in a room. (Speaking of which, I did call Homer McDonald directly once, since his phone number was offered in the ebook at the time -- and his rates were astronomical relative to my means -- alas.) Again, this should be helpful to many people feeling desperate. The wisdom in it is certainly helpful to relationships in turmoil (and some of it applies to happier relationships too, as mentioned). I don't believe it can reverse all dying relationships, though. If your spouse has met someone else and is in the early euphoric "honeymoon" phase (distorted though those feelings are), I don't think any attitude changes from the "tiresome and boring old spouse" are going to stand much of a chance. But many other problem relationships could certainly be helped.