Anger - ridden Husband Abusing Dog - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 11-19-2015, 04:38 AM Thread Starter
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Anger - ridden Husband Abusing Dog

For people with experience with domestic abuse please.

I've never thought in my life I would be in this situation. My husband has started exhibiting these angry outbursts where afterwards he admits that he "just saw red" and usually took the anger out on our 7 month old puppy. He either pushed the puppy too hard, or outright hit him and causing him to yelp, or threw him into his crate with anger. All the puppy was doing was being a puppy!
Last week was the worst by far. The puppy had jumped up and licked the pizza on the counter while my back was turned. I laughed a little, said "no!" And tapped him on the nose, and I put him in the crate just so I could finish making dinner. My husband overheard me and stormed into the kitchen saying "what did he do?" I told him and he ran up to the crate and KICKED THE CRATE halfway across the kitchen with the dog inside. I was so shocked I almost cried.

He has been seeing a therapist for 3 weeks now about his anger issues. He will have an episode like this, then be super apologetic and depressed for a few days, then he becomes Husband of the Year until he had another outburst.

I called a domestic abuse hotline and was told I need to leave right now.

I have an emergency bag at my place of work (a law enforcement agency) where I can safely stay if I have to leave. But I don't have a plan for the dog and my cat. The only friends I know are also my husband's friends and they would just return the animals to him.

Is it really time to leave? Should I give him more time in therapy and risk the next outburst to be against me?

I've talked to him about rehoming the dog but he absolutely will not allow it.

Im going crazy and stressing myself out to the point of exhaustion. I live three states away from any of my family and I have very little money in the bank due to paying off debts.

I'm just hoping it gets better, and next time I'm going to jump in front of the dog because at least I'm not as defenseless as him.

Any thoughts would help

I'm very lost.

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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 11-19-2015, 06:47 AM
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Re: Anger - ridden Husband Abusing Dog

Hi there,

I'm sorry you're here, but I think this should be moved to a different location. Maybe a mod (@Elegirl?) can move it to Considering Divorce. You won't get a lot of response here.

OK. My ex-husband was like this, and still is with his pets. I remember him kicking a great dane we had years ago down a whole flight of steps. His behavior has started to influence my daughter's treatment/lack of patience with her pets (even though she's a total animal lover....obsessed). It's NOT COOL. And it will escalated. With my ex, it also involved punching holes in walls, cracking doors, and eventually physical abuse with me a few times.

Contact a rescue organization and explain your situation. They can help you find a temporary foster home for the puppy. I wouldn't leave him alone with the puppy. I wold do this with or without his "permission." If you feel he'll get so angry about it (once he realizes the pup is gone) he may hurt you, find someplace else to stay yourself.

Your husband needs help. I'm sure this is not his only "issue."

If you truly love someone you want that person to have the freedom to become everything they seek. You want your partner to soar, not to imprison them. - Pluto2
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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 11-19-2015, 02:27 PM Thread Starter
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Re: Anger - ridden Husband Abusing Dog

Thanks for your response. Sorry I don't know how I got in this subforum. I'm still new to this forum.
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 04-11-2016, 04:31 PM
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Wow. This happened to me in my first marriage. It only gets worse. It started with pushing and screaming, unnecessary and excessive punishments for the dog, me and the kids. Eventually, he would beat me, he's poured lighter fluid on me and threatened to set me on fire, he put a loaded shotgun to my head. One day he killed our son's kitten; threw it against the wall and broke its neck because it scratched him. Run. Run far and run fast. It only gets worse.
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 04-11-2016, 04:38 PM
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Re: Anger - ridden Husband Abusing Dog

Quote:
Originally Posted by mustangsally View Post
Wow. This happened to me in my first marriage. It only gets worse. It started with pushing and screaming, unnecessary and excessive punishments for the dog, me and the kids. Eventually, he would beat me, he's poured lighter fluid on me and threatened to set me on fire, he put a loaded shotgun to my head. One day he killed our son's kitten; threw it against the wall and broke its neck because it scratched him. Run. Run far and run fast. It only gets worse.

I think the OP is gone from this forum, her post was almost 6 months ago.
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