Is there a section to discuss specific methods? - Talk About Marriage
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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 07-16-2016, 05:36 PM Thread Starter
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Is there a section to discuss specific methods?

For instance, I'm reading Gottman's Seven Principles. Our therapist recommended it, but I'd rather work on specific issues with her during our rare meetings.

What I'd love to find is a group where people have read and applied it and we can discuss. For instance, in his questionnaire on how much you know about yourself, he asks about tragedies in your life, successes and pains....I'd love to hear what other people wrote, because when I see a question like that, I come up totally blank, and need a kick-start to get my "answer machine" running. Just an example of what I'd hope to get out of such an exchange.

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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 07-16-2016, 08:18 PM
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Re: Is there a section to discuss specific methods?

Quote:
Originally Posted by DustyDog View Post
For instance, I'm reading Gottman's Seven Principles. Our therapist recommended it, but I'd rather work on specific issues with her during our rare meetings.

What I'd love to find is a group where people have read and applied it and we can discuss. For instance, in his questionnaire on how much you know about yourself, he asks about tragedies in your life, successes and pains....I'd love to hear what other people wrote, because when I see a question like that, I come up totally blank, and need a kick-start to get my "answer machine" running. Just an example of what I'd hope to get out of such an exchange.
Sounds like a great idea for a group discussion. You can start a thread on it, or start a social group, if you would like privacy.

One of the deepest feminine pleasures is when a man stands full, present, and unreactive in the midst of his woman's emotional storms. When he stays present with her, and loves her through the layers of wildness and closure, then she feels his trustability, and she can relax. -- David Deida, The Way of the Superior Man
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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 05-15-2017, 06:38 PM
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Re: Is there a section to discuss specific methods?

It has certainly been awhile since anyone dusted off this thread.

I thought I would respond a little bit. I have done Gottman Art and Science of Love weekend with my wife. Part of Day one was figuring out what you had in common (background and future) and what you valued in each other. I don't remember all the details. There is a very famous study that I am sure the Gottman's were aware of on questions and sharing that can kindle romantic love and respect.

The following set of 36 questions probably is similar to what the Gottmans were trying to achieve.

https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/f...mall.html?_r=0
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