jessielong1987

Okay me and my husband have been married for 9 months. I know they say the first year is the hardest, but I am not so sure this is normal. Let me explain, When we first got married he was very much in my life and would talk to me and we would have sex about twice a week or at least once a week. Now here lately he doesnt wanna talk to me anymore. he acts like im bothering him when i do wanna just have a normal conversation with him doesnt matter what its about. He doesnt wanna have sex with me but around once a month and thats if i ask for it. im 24 and he is 33 so there is no reason why we shouldnt be doing more in bed then once a month. he leaves all the time and doesnt come back for an hour or so. he always says he has to run and tells me where he is going but its like he is using every excuse he can to get out of the house. he used to ask me to go with him but now he never asks. the other night i even asked if i could go with him and his response and exact words were "that wasnt really in my plans". then when he got back he had a talk with me saying he needed to be alone at least 15 minutes a day. I just feel like he doesnt care about me anymore in any way. I know he loves me cause he tells me all the time but telling me isnt enough. he doesnt show it. But i just feel like im a huge burden to him now. like he is regretting getting married. even though he always says he never could imagine me not being with him or being married to me. I am just not sure what to make of all this and i wanted to get someone elses opinion.

Blanca

wow that would really hurt

What are your days like? Do you work? Do you go out with your friends sometimes without him?

If you are always waiting for him that can be really emotionally draining for him. I also had the same fights with my H in the beginning of my relationship. All I wanted was to be around him but he was often doing something else. As good as it feels to be with your H it does start to create problems because it's not emotionally healthy for either person. As hard as it is try and find something else that you love doing. Get some independence and something outside of your H that you really love. Give that a try, establish independence and outside emotionally support, and then see if you still feel like he doesnt really care about you. Your sex life will also return.

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"I'm a lover of what is, not because I'm a spiritual person, but because it hurts when I argue with reality."
- Bryon Katie