x2startermom

Just curious about those whom have done it. How would you say it has helped your marriage?

lamaga

Oy, vey.

livelaughlovenow

Clarify, please

lamaga

OK, I googled it and it seems to be another commercial scheme to
"fix" marital problems. I don't care for any of those, and I especially don't care for those that target people of a particular religion, as I feel they are assuming a mantle of authority that they have not earned.

Sorry. I talk too much sometimes.

livelaughlovenow

I was just wondering if you had tried it and had something personal against it. I am curious to if anyone has tried it. I have a friend who did the love dare with her husband and said it was wonderful. (they are christian of course) Both of these programs are for Christian families, very heavily Bible based and if both partners are not equally spiritual it will not work.

River1977

That is categorically untrue. If you don't know the movie and book, how could you state such opinions? I saw the movie and read portions of the book. They (the book mainly) are heavily based in scripture, but they are not strictly for Christian families, and they will/can work for EVERYONE. Although they are Bible-based, the principles are universal. They are things we think and do (and can accomplish) every day whether religious or not.

I strongly urge everyone to watch the movie and take the 40-day Love Dare (the book). If you are not religious, it is very easy to simply ignore the scripture references because neither the book nor the reader are bombarded with scripture, dogma, or doctrine. The way it's mostly setup is each principle is prefaced with the scripture the principle is based on/from. But, the principles themselves and the dares (the suggestions for what to do for your partner) are general in terms.

The best part is learning the meaning of love. No one needs to be religious to understand something like that. All the movie and book do is teach people how to love and teach people what to do to get their partner to love them and/or love them more.

The 40-day love dare is a daily suggestion of something to do for your partner. For 40 days in a row, you are prompted to do something just for them that shows/expresses your love and consideration. It's called the "Love Dare" because it might be easy to get through the first few days or so, but it begins to test your limits, your nerve, your love, and your devotion to your partner. The hard part is you must do these things for your partner for the whole 40 days, and you cannot expect anything in return for your good deeds.

It teaches the meaning of love, which is that love is unconditional. Many people heard that saying but have their own idea of what "unconditional love" means. Most people think loving someone unconditionally means to love the person no matter what - no matter how they are. People think they are supposed to love the person no matter what they do to you and no matter how they treat you. That's not what it means and doesn't even make any sense. No way will I love someone who treats me badly.

The book teaches that the meaning of love is to love selflessly and without expectations - meaning not to expect anything in return for your love. That's the reason making it through the whole 40 days might be hard for some people. We are often hung up on the concept of gratitude or expecting your partner to reciprocate. Taking the dare and following the principles doesn't teach your partner how to love you. It teaches you how to love your partner unconditionally. To learn how to love you unconditionally, your partner has to also take the 40-day Love Dare. It works wonders for marriages and can work even if just one partner takes the dare. It promotes love, acts of love, appreciation, and romance.

The movie Fireproof
The book Love Dare

PBear

I would agree with river. I went through the book, and just skipped over the religious stuff. There still seemed to be a lot of value to it.

C
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Gaia

Well now... this has sparked my interest. Never heard of it before and may just give it a shot.

PBear

If it does nothing else, it gives you something to think about every day for 40 days, specifically to do with your rebuilding your marriage relationship. As with any self help though... What you get out of it depends a lot on what you put into it.

C
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Gaia

We may not be able to get the book just yet... but hubby and i plan on watching the movie tonight! At first he was hesitant because of the scripture but i pointed out the post river made about ignoring that and focusing on the principles and he decided he'd give watching the movie a shot.

River1977

Gaia, and anyone else who is interested, I found excerpts of several Love Dare days. Like I tried to explain before, the principles are preceded by a scripture verse, then the dares are given at the end.

Please let me know if any links are broken. It took a long time to collect all the pages, so I didn't want to have to test all of them. Thanx for letting me know of any you come across so I can fix those.

Love Dare.....
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4
Day 5
Day 6
Day 7
Day 8
Day 9
Day 10
Day 11
Day 12
Day 13
Day 14
Day 15
Day 16
Day 17
Day 18
Day 19 Just in case anyone wants to avoid religion and doctrine, this dare is about prayer and God's love
Day 20
Day 21
Day 22
Day 23
Day 24
Day 25
Day 26
Day 27
Day 28
Day 29
Day
Day
Day

I will add more later as I have more time. Hope lots of people enjoy these and implement the Love Dare in their marriage.

x2startermom

Lovedarestories.com you can find all of 'em plus more.

sculley

Honestly watching the movie helped my husband and I to see a lot of things. We were just like that couple. I dont think the love dare will be the fix all persay learning to respect each other is and that helps alittle bit

Maricha75

I am actually on Day 13 today. Some of these days have been easy, but even in these beginning days, some have been tough. But I am still doing it. I did not tell him I have started it. We each have a copy for if/when we choose to do it. As far as I know, he has not started. I watched the movie, still working on getting hubby to watch it as well. We are both Christians, so the Scripture base isn't a turn off for us. I'd say the worst thing is that we are trying to come to terms with our own shortcomings. Doing that is proving to be difficult. But The Love Dare and Fireproof have given me a starting point on looking inside myself. And that is the whole point.

But, I guess, Lamaga, it is, to a certain extent, a "fix" for marital problems. A fix that I, as a Christian, have learned to use... my belief in God, and in His love to be able to truly show my husband that I love him. In MY eyes, that is the best "fix" for marital woes.

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Grayson

I just figured the "Oy, vey" was in regards to the horrible message that the movie sends. Namely, "the best way to win back a cheating partner's attentions is to literally buy them back."