Join Date: May 2008
Location: Southern California
Re: Book Reviews
TITLE:The Five Love Languages
WHAT YOU LIKED/DISLIKED:
The Five Love Languages really is a must read for just about everyone, hopefully before they get married.
The author states that people each have a specific "language" they speak when it comes to love. They use this language to show their love for someone else, and it is the language they understand most in turn. He breaks it down into five primary languages: words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, receiving gifts, and physical touch. Unfortunately, few couples speak the same "love language" and that's where things fall apart once the honeymoon phase (anywhere from 6 months to 2 years) ends.
In order for a marriage to be truly happy, each partner needs to find out from their spouse exactly what it is that makes them feel most connected and loved, and then make doing that a priority. While the book tends to give examples of extremes (if "Words of Affirmation" is your primary language then you can't understand or need any of the others at all) and I tend to think in reality people can have two, or even more, languages that are important to them, it is still an excellent book to help you figure out what your language is and the importance of both partners to focus on what their spouse needs most.
The other great thing about this book is that is not just written for a spouse feeling in trouble, it's not about solving a specific issue, and it's not preachy. It is as important to read before a marriage starts as it is after a chasm has already been opened. It's about helping both partners stop making assumptions about their spouses needs based on their own, and helping them uncover the necessary information they need to show each other love in the way that is most important to each.
Last edited by BlueCreek; 08-27-2008 at 04:39 PM.