Wife is taking me to an asian massage parlor!

Flanders · 03-11-2010, 09:10 AM

The city I am going to has about 8 massage places. The one I'm going to has the hottest chicks. Any suggestions to do to prolong the experience? These places have massage tables and they also have bubble baths and hot tubs. What to do to fullfill my hour, and what should the wife do to make it exciting? I'm under the impression that I will have to ask for certain sex stuff, I don't think they will offer, since it is a massage place and not a brothel.

Happyquest · 03-11-2010, 09:27 AM

Just remember if there is sexual services being preformed there. what they are doing is probably illegal. There is a slim chance you could end up in jail if there is sexual service happening there. IE happy endings.

The squick factor is the chance of transmitted STD if there is sexual contacts. So if you get a happy ending remember the person before you probably did too and his happy ending might not have been cleaned up very well. Thats what I mean by squick factor. I dont mean to be a kill joy but you need to think about it before hand because once Mr Woodie gets all hard your thinking brain will probably not function the way he should.

Scannerguard · 03-11-2010, 01:15 PM

Quote:

Just remember if there is sexual services being preformed there. what they are doing is probably illegal. There is a slim chance you could end up in jail if there is sexual service happening there.

And you would definitely have the "squick" factor in jail as you meet your new cellmate, Bubba.

It reminds me of a funny cartoon I saw once. It was Michael Jackson in jail and there's this biker looking guy sitting on his bed across the cell and he is saying,

"Wanna have a sleepover?"

AlexNY · 03-11-2010, 01:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Scannerguard

... It reminds me of a funny cartoon I saw once. It was Michael Jackson in jail and there's this biker looking guy sitting on his bed across the cell and he is saying,

"Wanna have a sleepover?"

Two guys sharing a cell happens in prison. Johns wind up in jail, not prison. Jail is more like 40 people to a cell, instead of 2.

Mr. Snow White will make a splendid "belle of the ball" for that party!

Therealbrighteyes · 03-11-2010, 02:04 PM

Happy Quest nailed it. Squick factor is the number of dudes who have done the same thing on the table and don't even get me started on the hot tub. Flanders, have you read up on these places? Not only are they dingy and desperate but mostly house trafficked women. It's really really sad. Perhaps you might change your mind?

63Vino · 03-11-2010, 10:22 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brennan

Happy Quest nailed it. Squick factor is the number of dudes who have done the same thing on the table and don't even get me started on the hot tub. Flanders, have you read up on these places? Not only are they dingy and desperate but mostly house trafficked women. It's really really sad. Perhaps you might change your mind?

TMI flanders! At the beginning this was funny.
Maybe you'll get better information from a different forum.

I think I need a rubber on my keypad to even post in this thread!!!!

Posted via Mobile Device

Flanders · 03-12-2010, 07:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Happyquest

Just remember if there is sexual services being preformed there. what they are doing is probably illegal. There is a slim chance you could end up in jail if there is sexual service happening there. IE happy endings.

The squick factor is the chance of transmitted STD if there is sexual contacts. So if you get a happy ending remember the person before you probably did too and his happy ending might not have been cleaned up very well. Thats what I mean by squick factor. I dont mean to be a kill joy but you need to think about it before hand because once Mr Woodie gets all hard your thinking brain will probably not function the way he should.

How am I going to get an std? You can not get anything from a handy joby. Or oral with a jimmy. And to avoid the squick factor I will be going there at shift change and get a fresh one.

Flanders · 03-12-2010, 08:02 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Brennan

Happy Quest nailed it. Squick factor is the number of dudes who have done the same thing on the table and don't even get me started on the hot tub. Flanders, have you read up on these places? Not only are they dingy and desperate but mostly house trafficked women. It's really really sad. Perhaps you might change your mind?

These are local girls working in these places, and they have kids and they don't want to get any std's from the customers. I have talked to one of them that works there and she was really nice, they are not forced into it, most are women that either lost their job or their husband is out of work and this job will easily pay the mortgage. There is no anal or vagina penetration. Just handys and oral with a jimmy. You can't get any safer than that. And a bonus is these chicks are hot.

The main reason for this thread is to let people know there is something to do that might help your relationship.

Flanders · 03-12-2010, 08:13 AM

Tomorrow is the big day, I will be getting a rub down in approximatly 35 hours, I am getting excited.

Do you people want a review when I get back? By the way I phoned all the asian massage places and there is no asian girls working there

. Why call it an asian massage parlor?

Happyquest · 03-12-2010, 11:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flanders

These are local girls working in these places, and they have kids and they don't want to get any std's from the customers. I have talked to one of them that works there and she was really nice, they are not forced into it, most are women that either lost their job or their husband is out of work and this job will easily pay the mortgage. There is no anal or vagina penetration. Just handys and oral with a jimmy. You can't get any safer than that. And a bonus is these chicks are hot.

The main reason for this thread is to let people know there is something to do that might help your relationship.

Yes you can get alot safer than that. You can be monogamous like marriage was entended. You have this all justfied in your head so have fun.

Some how I dont think visiting a massage parlor would be a way to help your relationship. It was never recommended by any books or counseling I have ever been to.

I would rather not know how things went when you get back. If your doing it for your marriage then the only one that needs to know how it went is your wife.

63Vino · 03-15-2010, 08:16 AM

ok flanders... lets have it!

Flanders · 03-15-2010, 08:30 AM

Okay, but I am a gentleman.

All I can say is the girl was so nice a beautiful and there was a happy ending. Best 1.5 hours of my life, and my marriage is better than ever. It was more sensual than anything. Just have to say my back doesn't hurt anymore and I am very happy. The spa was super clean and welcoming.

kirkster5 · 03-15-2010, 05:50 PM

Wow, I'm so happy for you that the best 1.5 hours of your life was spent with a prostitute and not with your wife. She must be beaming with excitement with that statement. Husband of the year points scored bigtime.

This will come back to haunt you.

Hey, just for fun lets flip the table and lets just say your wife comes to you now and says "well now you had your fun, I want to hire this super stud to give me the best 1.5 hours of my life
'cause you haven't been able to do it for me". "Thank you so much for letting another man pleasure me sexually. Why don't you go wait with your buddies and tell them what is happening to me over a beer and I'll call when I shower off!!" I just cant imagine all the high fives and atta boys you will get!!

I'm guessing when you mature a bit (and I'm not necessarily talking about age) you'll realize this was not your proudest moment. Sometimes just because someone tells you its OK to do something doesn't mean it is the right thing to do as a Human and as a husband.

I'll do a quick check of my wedding vows.......lets see....love....honor....cherish...foresaking all others......wait a minute......How could I have missed this one......foresaking all others except the prostitute who agrees to rub one out for me at the "Asian Messsage Parlor". Sorry, I guess I was wrong. Well tell the wife to have a good time then. I'll hoist a cold one in her honor.

Flanders · 03-15-2010, 10:26 PM

Last I checked the bible says a wife is suppose to please their man and make him happy. She didn't complain afterwards. What is wrong with 2 hot chicks working over a hard working man that gives his wife and kids what ever they want? I do more than what a husband is expected and my wife just wants to please me as best as she can. I give my wife

Some of these people on this sight could learn something from my wife on how to keep a marriage together. And rock it hard

63Vino · 03-16-2010, 05:47 AM

ofmg RIGHT!!..WEN was the last time you checked the BIBLE????

hahah Realy?

Good one..
Well not really.

The massage parlor thing...or anything that you pay for is SURELY not my thing. But you're entitiled to do whatever you want. Just say that!

Dont bring the bible into it!!!