How Big is too Big?
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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Focused Topics »Sex in Marriage » How Big is too Big?

Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 03-25-2010, 11:58 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Default How Big is too Big?

Hello everyone. This is my first post but I have lurked here for a while now.

My Hubby and I are coming up on our 3rd wedding anniversary. We have been together for about 5 years and friends for more than 10. We are 26 and 27 (me, him). We both come from parents with dysfunctional marriages & divorce so we have made a commitment to communicate and be very aware of our marriage needs. For us sex is a very big part of it and we have had some awesome adventures!

What I am wondering is if a guy can be too big for safe anal sex. Hubs is very well endowed and is worried that he would cause me damage. We both enjoy anal stimulation (and I like toys there too!) but I really want to do this with him.

Any thoughts?
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Old 03-25-2010, 03:45 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

You could get sex toys in various sizes and try them one at a time, working up until you find it too uncomfortable to continue. Then compare the last one that fit to your husband. If he's bigger, don't do it.

Use a lot of lubricant.
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Old 03-26-2010, 02:35 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

You must try first with small objects and let him know that you like it occasionally. If he dosen't like then don't compel, its better that you give him both options at same time, when he is putting in your vagina same time you apply some lubricant in your other hole and finger yourself, its better to have a protection or thin latex. If it is still tight and he feels that you will get hurt, then put two or three fingers together and be in a position so that he can take out from one hole and put in another directly, try few times and let him twist whenever he puts in vagina to make the joining membrane soft.
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Old 03-27-2010, 08:19 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

Dont quite understand the "twisting".
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Old 03-27-2010, 07:21 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

Thanks for the posts.

We do anal play on each other already. Plugs and other toys. But getting him to take the last step has been hard. I know he wants it but is afraid of really hurting me. He had a bad exp with a GF years ago.

I picked up 3 new plugs today. The last one is just about as thick as he is. So far the biggest toy we've used is about 3/4ths of his size.

He's away till Thursday so I am going to do some work on it. This is the last "virginity" I have to give him and for some reason it means so much to me to have him take it.
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Old 04-18-2010, 09:01 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Yahoo!! just was able to use a toy as close to his size as I could find! Most amazing solo O of my life!!!!!!!

I have been using progressively bigger plugs and toys every other day and it worked! Surprisingly not painful. well just a little bit at first.

Sent him a pic of the toy then one with it in place! He called me 2 seconds after he got it! He will be home on Wednesday, our anniversary!!!!!
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Old 04-19-2010, 11:28 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

Well I have to say Anal Ease works wonders because it numbs the area a little so you are comfortable. Have your husband talk to you threw it and a little at a time so that way he knows if it is to much to back off a little, but a little each time leads to such great pleasure and a WOW orgasm you will not soon forget.
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Old 04-20-2010, 12:05 AM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

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Originally Posted by CandyS View Post
Well I have to say Anal Ease works wonders because it numbs the area a little so you are comfortable. Have your husband talk to you threw it and a little at a time so that way he knows if it is to much to back off a little, but a little each time leads to such great pleasure and a WOW orgasm you will not soon forget.
Yes and clit stimulation at the same time is a must for me...my hubby is endowed also but the few times we have done it just cuz i'm hesistant I have to let him bend me over and slowly walk me thru it as CandyS said above...I culdnt sit on it but thats just me maybe one day! But yes yes ANAL LUBE u still really feel the BEST O just not the uncomfy pain...have fun
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Old 04-22-2010, 03:38 PM   #9 (permalink)
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It was AMAZING!!!

Thanks for the lube tip. It made it go better than I thought. He was very gentle. Almost too gentle at times. He was so worried about hurting me. I had to tell him he could go a little faster a few times.

We both had incredible O's.

I am surprised that I don't have much discomfort today considering that I could really tell that he was a little bit bigger than the biggest toy I used. So I guess my prep work paid off!

I WANT MORE!!

How often is too often?
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Old 04-23-2010, 01:42 PM   #10 (permalink)
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It was AMAZING!!!

Thanks for the lube tip. It made it go better than I thought. He was very gentle. Almost too gentle at times. He was so worried about hurting me. I had to tell him he could go a little faster a few times.

We both had incredible O's.

I am surprised that I don't have much discomfort today considering that I could really tell that he was a little bit bigger than the biggest toy I used. So I guess my prep work paid off!

I WANT MORE!!

How often is too often?
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I think how often is going to be up to you guys. It's new to you so I think you just need to listen to you body. My wife and I go through cycles with it. We will do it very often for a few weeks then wont for a while. I think most importantly though, you need to listen to your body and if something feels off then take a break.
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Old 04-23-2010, 02:26 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Saya View Post
It was AMAZING!!!

Thanks for the lube tip. It made it go better than I thought. He was very gentle. Almost too gentle at times. He was so worried about hurting me. I had to tell him he could go a little faster a few times.

We both had incredible O's.

I am surprised that I don't have much discomfort today considering that I could really tell that he was a little bit bigger than the biggest toy I used. So I guess my prep work paid off!

I WANT MORE!!

How often is too often?
Posted via Mobile Device
You both sound like you are having a lot of fun! It's nice to read about a couple that is enjoying sex.

I gave my husband my "anal virginity" as well and it was special for both of us and it's a regular activity we both enjoy (along with using various toys and such) and you can have fun by varying your positions (as to where you have it and what positions you are in).

My husband is pretty well endowed so I say you can never use too much lubricant. Plus, I don't think you can do it too often until you get sore and it isn't pleasurable anymore. I find it's always fun to vary things too. That's what the toys are for. Sometimes my husband will use toys on me and pleasure himself. Somehow I find that rather arousing. We can get pretty kinky sometimes.

Be careful about having anal and then vaginal intercourse. You don't want to give yourself an infection in certain places, if you know what I mean.
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Old 04-23-2010, 02:54 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

Damn, what's goin on in here??!?! Since when is a woman craving anal sex? I can only dream..haha, all in good time I guess.
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Old 04-23-2010, 03:14 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

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Damn, what's goin on in here??!?! Since when is a woman craving anal sex? I can only dream..haha, all in good time I guess.
You gotta find yourself the right woman dude.
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Old 04-24-2010, 07:40 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

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Originally Posted by Freak On a Leash View Post
You gotta find yourself the right woman dude.
haha, I'm married dude..I've got a great woman who does NOT like Anal sex...
Cant have everything I guess..
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Old 04-24-2010, 07:51 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: How Big is too Big?

Quote:
Originally Posted by CandyS View Post
Well I have to say Anal Ease works wonders because it numbs the area a little so you are comfortable. Have your husband talk to you threw it and a little at a time so that way he knows if it is to much to back off a little, but a little each time leads to such great pleasure and a WOW orgasm you will not soon forget.
I would add the cautionary note that this would one time where you may want to use a condom. That stuff does numb the butt hole but it numbed up my penis too. After that failure we showered and tried to get it back up with a bj and her lips were numb too! It was, as I recall, over two hours before there was enough wood to finish the project.
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