Threesome?
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Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 04-20-2010, 08:07 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Threesome?

I've been having fantasies of having a threesome with my husband and another man. I know how bad that sounds, but my husband has a fantasy of me and another woman with him as well. Now I'm starting to become more open to the idea, and I've even thought about maybe doing a couples thing. Is it worth it? Could it ruin my marriage? The thought is exhilarating, but also nerve-wrecking. I don't know how to bring it up to him either? I know this is a hard question to answer, and there are many forms of opinions on the topic of threesomes and group sex. I ask that you don't judge me on this post, and post your honest advice. Opinions are welcome too, but I just ask that you please be tasteful about it.
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Old 04-20-2010, 08:59 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Threesome?

This is always an interesting topic. Sometimes, a threesome is more trouble than it is worth. I have heard more horror stories than good ones when venturing into this realm.

Seems like you and your hubby have a different vision on this topic. I think that this is something that you should take up with your hubby in conversation. Then the both of you can decide as to make it a reality or just keep it in the fantasy category.

Good luck!!
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Old 04-21-2010, 07:46 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Threesome?

When we first decided to venture into playing with other couples, it was the same ideas- i wanted a mff and he liked the idea of mfm- while we havent done either- we have decided to start seeing couples and see where that leads us. COMMUNICATION is key- and starting slow- we started with going to strip clubs- making sure we both had a great time-
Once you decide its something u both would like to try- its best to each make a list of things you want- and things that you are comfortable. Then compare the list and anything you BOTH have on ur list as wanting is your starting point- slow and steady-
Our first experience didnt involved any real swinging- just same room sex with another couple- which was so exciting and a huge turn on- since then we are planning our 2nd encounter soon- where we will be going farther and venturing into "soft swap"- we both have agreed that full swap- ie penetration/intercourse with the other couple- is not something we want to do, so our level is soft swap-
The key is communication- just open up the idea to him- when i first brought it up hubs was hesitant because of al the stereotypes of what goes on- but after really looking into it, we both LOVE it and have grown sooo much closer by the honesty and communication that it takes to do something like this...
Anyways this post is getting long lol- mainly just talk about it, it wont hurt to discuss it- and if u guys decide to try it- take it slow! There are some really great sites out there- just yahoo search, that u guys can join and meet other couples that have the same wants as you guys- hope this helps and good luck!!!
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Old 04-21-2010, 12:58 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Threesome?

totally agree with SweetipieMI communication and going slow and realize that you or he may have a bad experience with a couple or a part of a couple key is talking about it and setting limits.
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Old 04-21-2010, 08:27 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Threesome?

In the beginning we did lots of things together. Even the swing clubs. We even worked with the couple that ran one and had lots of sessions with mff. She said she had no interest in other men, period. We ran that way for 3-4 years. Then one day at a straight party, about 5 am, I walked in and caught her and another guy playing tonsil hockey. I just about killed them both. He was a cop and his brother, also a cop, heard the racket and came out to see what was up. I offered to kick his ass too but he declined. On the way home I made her give me head while driving down the x-way. I got off in her mouth (never before and never since) kinda' like marking my territory.
It wasn't the fact that she was with another man, it was the deception. I've expressed many times my desire to share her with another man and she just said she was drunk. It was later, after the kids were born that our sex fell into dispair but I would still be willing to have the mmf with her. Jelousy isn't the issue with me, it's honesty and trust.
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Old 04-21-2010, 09:01 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Threesome?

I will admit that my wife and I have fantasies of this as well. Hers run more mff, mine more mmf ... however, while we are very open and adventurous sexually, we are also both deeply devoted Christians and so our religious beliefs would and will keep us from ever acting on those fantasies.
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Old 04-28-2010, 12:27 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Threesome?

I agree too communication is key...but start out talking about what ifs in your own bed together and see where it leads ask questions, give answers be honest if the thought of another woman and ur man kills u then dont go there and vice versa...u just have to be cautious and careful with each others feelings and opinions you will learn new things about each other and its a GREAT experience if you dont rush into it. That first time seeing him/her with another person will totally take your breath away and may even make you reconsider it all...but once you talk about it with them and relish in their experience with that other person its different its an awakening at least it was for us

Good Luck!
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