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Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 03-16-2011, 09:39 AM   #31 (permalink)
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Default Re: What is the deal with Blow Jobs?

The appeal to me, in comparison to hand jobs.

It's more intimate. Pleasuring someone with your mouth vs hand is a step up, both for men and women (I'd think).

It feels different/good. It's typically warmer and wetter. Although a hand job with lube is a very nice thing too.

Visually, it's very arousing. Especially when she looks you in the eye at the same time. Creative use of a mirror or two can make it even more so for both partners, I think.

For either one, in comparison to "regular" sex, it's her doing something for specifically for me, focusing on MY pleasure. I think it's easier for the woman to control the activity, allowing her to tease and control the man's orgasm, which can add appreciably to the experience. Plus (as my lover brought up last night) it allows the woman to explore prostate massages at the same time, which is a whole other kettle of fish.

Having said that, I'd say that in every one of my relationships, I'm much more giving when it comes to oral than receiving. Even if it starts off as focusing on me, I think I can count on the fingers of one hand how many times (in the last 20+ years of being sexually active) I got mine and my partner didn't get hers. And I have no issues with that! I don't want one "all the time" and to be honest, I often don't orgasm from them. But they're a great warm up for the main event.

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Old 03-25-2012, 07:11 PM   #32 (permalink)
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Default Re: What is the deal with Blow Jobs?

I don't understand why women have such a hard time with BJs. I happen to love giving them, it makes me VERY excited. My husband and I just got married a month ago, but we were living together for 3 years prior to that and I see no reason to stop or slow down on the BJs. I know my husband loves and desires me, he loves watching me give him a BJ (he even taped me doing it for when I'm not around). He always reciprocates when I want him to. Even if I'm not in the mood and he comes to me requesting a BJ, I give it to him and that usually puts me right in the mood. I love him and he loves me, no games here. What's the big deal, ladies?
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Old 03-25-2012, 09:34 PM   #33 (permalink)
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First of all, I rarely get blow jobs and have never gotten one to completion. My wife has TMJ and it hurts her. She also can't stand the consistancy of cum. Actually I like her hand jobs better but I would rather make love with her than any of it. So I am afraid I can't help you much. BTW I give her as much oral as she wants.
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The marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband. Marriage is not a place to "stand up for your rights." Marriage is a decision to serve the other, whether in bed or out. 1 Corinthians 7:2 (The Message)
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