Sex in MarriageSexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.
I really want to receive oral but feel like I'm ugly down there because I have maybe about an inch long hairs on my folds...it's embarrassing. I've tried nair which irritates a ton and shaving which gives me bumps. Trimming seems to help a bit but I'm still self conscious. I go down on my DH all the time, but he never returns the favor and it makes me feel bad. He says I don't ask. Any suggestions on grooming and subtly asking to get oral??
I am wondering if your husband only gets oral when he asks for it. When he does ask, before starting you could tell him that you'd like it to be reciprocated.
If on the other hand you give him oral without him having to ask, then, beforehand, tell him your "going down" and would like it to be reciprocated and see how that goes.
Another thought is to get some whipped cream or whatever and ask him to lick it off.
With the hair issue, easier said than done, but try not to be too self conscious. The strange thing would be if you didn't have any hair growing down there LOL! If you trim regularly you should be fine (I'm assuming you use a trimmer which cuts the hairs really short, rather than just trimming with scissors). Maybe your hubby might even enjoy helping with the trimming once in a while if you gave him the opportunity.
My wife is a licenced cosmetologist. You may want to try going to a cosmetologist supply store. Some allow unlicenced people to buy certain items there. They sell hair removal items that you can use on all body areas without any irritation. This maybe what you are looking for.
I would think that he senses your embarrassment and your discomfort and while he might not know why you feel that way, is trying not to make it worse. I would tell him you would like it, and see what he says. He told you you never ask, so ask. Not necessarily, "Hey, babe, will you go down tonight?" but like someone else said, when you're about to, tell him you'd like it if he did too, or if he asks you to, tell him you will if he will.
As for hair removal, there are lots of options. I shave that area, and I use something called Bikini Zone Shave Gel, which is absolutely awesome and I never have bumps. You could try that. There's also waxing (I'd recommend paying a pro to do it), or you can just search online and probably find some other at-home options you can try. And honestly, so what if there's some hair? It's not the end of the world. I'm sure when he married you, he promised to love you forever, not to love you as long as your intimate areas were hair-free.
I go down on my DH all the time, but he never returns the favor and it makes me feel bad. He says I don't ask. Any suggestions on grooming and subtly asking to get oral??
I am not going to take that to mean he asks you "all the time" to go down on him. Tell his lazy, inconsiderate butt that you should not have to ask. But okay, here is a standing request until the end of time "Go down on me."
Get it waxed! I've been waxing down there bare since my late teens not because I was having sex but because hair made me feel dirty/ugly.
I think everyone should shave/wax down there, just like they do their armpits.
I have to agree with cherrypie, waxing works wonders especially if you like the bare look. You can't have any hang ups about the person doing the wax seeing you naked though. So if you do, try trimming and then using baby oil in the shower to shave off the rest. That's what I do when I don't have time to get it done at a salon. OR....what can be even more fun....having your partner get in the tub with you and letting him do the shaving...I've had some very erotic experiences start that way
Leave it and tell him to deal with it... But i sense its you and your confidence he knows you're hairy he loves you he'll enjoy but if don't know how will he get down there... Talk with him get his view but remember its your body i don't want my wave to shave bald just trim she will not so who cares i end up with pubs in teeth and she's happy and you should also be. Posted via Mobile Device
It's not the hair he's just lazy. Just push his head down there he'll catch on. Hair down there is definitely not ugly. I prefer hair myself. A vagina without hair would be like boobs without nipples to me.
Thank you all, I really appreciate all the posts very helpful and comforting. I have a few more questions... I have sensitive skin if I go to a salon will I bleed after waxing? How long does it take until the hair grows back? I'll try bikini zone too. I just wish I could go with a brown bag over my head when I go to the salon About asking to receive oral... I'll try asking before I go down on him. Oh and yes I just go down on him without his asking almost all the time, but sometimes he does ask. About him being lazy about it...this is probably somewhat true and he justifies it by saying I don't ask AND he senses I may be a bit embarrassed about it. Thanks again for your posts!
I like a lot of the advice here except for one - the whipped cream.
I don't mind a bush on a woman. . .(in fact, I like it look like a juicy dorito chip triangle). . .and you could even say I have a little oral fixation. I like oral sex (mostly giving, a little receiving) to be a healthy part of my sex life.
But if you want to break that oral fixation, mix a little whip cream and pubic hair and I'll be cured of that. I wouldn't go there.
Anyway, for my manscaping, I use the Norelco male groomer.
First, there's absolutely nothing with a woman who has pubic hair. never bothered me and it shouldn't bother you.
You can try trimming with a pair of clippers to shorten it as mush as you like, maybe even trimming the inside edge to give him a better "path" (Sorry, don't know a better way of saying it without being censored.)
Next time you go down on him, have him lie on his back, Go down on him then slide yourself into a 69 position and let him do his thing while you do yours. Tell him how good he is making you feel and it won't be the last time.
Thank you all, I really appreciate all the posts very helpful and comforting. I have a few more questions... I have sensitive skin if I go to a salon will I bleed after waxing? How long does it take until the hair grows back? I'll try bikini zone too. I just wish I could go with a brown bag over my head when I go to the salon About asking to receive oral... I'll try asking before I go down on him. Oh and yes I just go down on him without his asking almost all the time, but sometimes he does ask. About him being lazy about it...this is probably somewhat true and he justifies it by saying I don't ask AND he senses I may be a bit embarrassed about it. Thanks again for your posts!
It might bleed a little, especially if you've shaved. But the 2nd time it might be ok.The hair become sort of thinner and pull much easily when you wax often. I go about once a month, the hair there grow more slowly at least for me.
Don't ASK him to go down on you before you start getting hot and heavy. When you go down on him pull away before he even gets close to an orgasm, smile and say "your turn" or do like Chet8625 said.
hairy folds and receiving oral 
Re: hairy folds and receiving oral 
