Wife just isnt interested as much as I am
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Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 07-29-2010, 05:02 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Default Wife just isnt interested as much as I am

Been married 7 years. She is very good looking. I am also considered good looking, in very good shape, have a great job and care a great deal for my kids.

the only thing missing is the lack of interest in sex in my wife. She isnt interested in anyone else. She works and comes right home. She has very little interests expect for the kids and her tv shows. She makes all kinds of excuses, mostly plays the avoiding game by falling asleep on the couch.

I have pleaded with her the last couple of months. I have told her it's unacceptable to me we only had sex once every two months. She upped it to every two weeks but still I told her it's not enough. I really dont think she understands how serious I am.

I have suggested date nights but she never follows through on getting the sitters to make it happen. She feels once a month is good going out because her girlfriends do it like that. We still dont even go out once a month.

I love going out. I love being social. I love sex. I can settle actually for once a week, preferably twice.

Any suggestions because I'm either going to get a girlfriend or divorce.

Please dont suggest something silly like buying her flowers. We are way beyond that.

thanks.
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Old 07-29-2010, 06:05 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: Wife just isnt interested as much as I am

Sounds to me , this situation is a "Deal Breaker" for you (can't say I blame you at all). You have been struggling with this for over 2 yrs now.

I would imagine all of this has been looked into by now, but physically speaking, is their anything hampering her desire ? birth control pills, depression meds, thyroid issues, has she cared to get her hormones checked or willing to get checked for the sake of saving the marraige ???

Since you been dealing with this SOOO long, I would imagine your resentment over it - is always in the room -which further dampens her interest for intimacy. Have you made any progress in these past 2 yrs, do you feel she is still angry?

How do you feel about letting her know honestly & on the table, this is simply no longer acceptable to you, giving her the opportunity to change/try to meet you half way in allowing herself to be aroused , or letting the marraige go.

Before an affair.
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Old 07-30-2010, 02:20 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: Wife just isnt interested as much as I am

I posted something just like this! My wife and I are 28 and both very attractive people, I support her with a very nice life (never has to worry about money) and we have 2 kids. She was only giving it to me once a week or once everyother week. She said she just was not interested in sex and just did not have a drive. A guy on here suggested that I try to play hard to get and act like I was not interested in her. Well it was SUPER hard the first few weeks because she blew it off, but then she started to think that I was cheating on her and then that progressed to her trying to tease me and then that lead to her pushing me for sex mainly to secure that I am not going anywhere else. This process takes some time, but hey it worked Good luck man!
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Old 07-30-2010, 05:39 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Wife just isnt interested as much as I am

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Originally Posted by Rem1100 View Post
I posted something just like this! My wife and I are 28 and both very attractive people, I support her with a very nice life (never has to worry about money) and we have 2 kids. She was only giving it to me once a week or once everyother week. She said she just was not interested in sex and just did not have a drive. A guy on here suggested that I try to play hard to get and act like I was not interested in her. Well it was SUPER hard the first few weeks because she blew it off, but then she started to think that I was cheating on her and then that progressed to her trying to tease me and then that lead to her pushing me for sex mainly to secure that I am not going anywhere else. This process takes some time, but hey it worked Good luck man!
YEa I already tried that. It didnt work at all. She is the type who is very wrapped up in life. Work, kids etc. Sex just doesnt seem something she's interested in.

I gave her a pretty stern talking to about a month ago. We'll see what happens.
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Old 07-30-2010, 05:46 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: Wife just isnt interested as much as I am

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Originally Posted by SimplyAmorous View Post
Sounds to me , this situation is a "Deal Breaker" for you (can't say I blame you at all). You have been struggling with this for over 2 yrs now.

I would imagine all of this has been looked into by now, but physically speaking, is their anything hampering her desire ? birth control pills, depression meds, thyroid issues, has she cared to get her hormones checked or willing to get checked for the sake of saving the marraige ???

Since you been dealing with this SOOO long, I would imagine your resentment over it - is always in the room -which further dampens her interest for intimacy. Have you made any progress in these past 2 yrs, do you feel she is still angry?

How do you feel about letting her know honestly & on the table, this is simply no longer acceptable to you, giving her the opportunity to change/try to meet you half way in allowing herself to be aroused , or letting the marraige go.

Before an affair.
Yea I've worked on staying positive she still is very appealing to me. Patience is one of my better virtues obviously.

I've laid it on the table with a very frank talk last month. I even impressed myself. But I want to make sure I do everything and have no regrets.
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