am bored of my sex life.. please help
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Navigation »Talk About Marriage »Focused Topics »Sex in Marriage » am bored of my sex life.. please help

Sex in Marriage Sexual problems are common in many relationships. This section is for discussions about sexuality. Please limit discussions to those asking for help with a problem and those offering advice. Any other threads may be deleted.

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Old 07-31-2010, 11:53 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Unhappy am bored of my sex life.. please help

i have been with my man for a year now and up til now our sex life was great. about a month ago things kinda went sour. he still enjoys sex but not me. it not that he is not good, it just we do the same thing almost every night and i have gotten so bored that i can not get excited anymore. i have tried to talk to him and bring new ideas, but he seems to just shot them down and forget about them. i have even tried showing him what i like in the bedroom when in the moment. but that doesn't help either, and to make things worse when we are done, he rolls over and fell asleep. i feel like he has sex with me for just him self. i have tried everything that i can think of. but i don't know where to go. am afraid that if we don't find something to fix it, am not going to be able to stay with him. i really don't want that. but it is slowly starting to affect our relationships outside the bedroom.. please help..
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Old 08-01-2010, 12:35 AM   #2 (permalink)
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Default Re: am bored of my sex life.. please help

It really is ok to tell someone "I need you to do THIS" to me until I am satisfied. And then after that, we can do what you want. If he refuses then get out of bed. Selfish sex is bad for the person whose needs are being ignored.

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Originally Posted by Gracey_86 View Post
i have been with my man for a year now and up til now our sex life was great. about a month ago things kinda went sour. he still enjoys sex but not me. it not that he is not good, it just we do the same thing almost every night and i have gotten so bored that i can not get excited anymore. i have tried to talk to him and bring new ideas, but he seems to just shot them down and forget about them. i have even tried showing him what i like in the bedroom when in the moment. but that doesn't help either, and to make things worse when we are done, he rolls over and fell asleep. i feel like he has sex with me for just him self. i have tried everything that i can think of. but i don't know where to go. am afraid that if we don't find something to fix it, am not going to be able to stay with him. i really don't want that. but it is slowly starting to affect our relationships outside the bedroom.. please help..
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Old 08-01-2010, 07:33 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Default Re: am bored of my sex life.. please help

this has been a problem every night for an entire month? maybe back it down to 2-3 times a week, or 1-2 times a month like we do.
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Old 08-01-2010, 05:09 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: am bored of my sex life.. please help

If you are doing the same thing for 2-3 times a week, for however long you are married then ofcourse its going to be boring. This happens to me regularly too. You are probably just sexxed-out as I call it... lol. Tell your hubby you are on a break for a good week, then it won't be quite as boring when you start up again afterwards! It's just like anything.. you do something too much, you get sick of it!
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Old 08-04-2010, 04:11 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Default Re: am bored of my sex life.. please help

You said almost every night.Back it down.And if you are either one or both are try to hard for the other.With trying do other things while having one need not to ask.Then and again you do sometime but for the most part you.You i was you i would take sometime and look at yourself and him and be fair.If not you or him mite have a lot to lose.But back the sex down.There is a lot to a relationship then just sex.
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Old 08-08-2010, 12:41 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: am bored of my sex life.. please help

Chances are you would be sexually bored no matter who you are with. It is the relationship itself that is boring you. Many people are like this and when they get married they suffer greatly because only with sexual newness and variety can they be truly happy sexually.
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Old 12-28-2010, 02:13 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: am bored of my sex life.. please help

I have the same problem right now....

When my girlfriend and I have sex it's the same thing and I find myself not having much desire. I know everything is working right, and I still have the desire for sex, but I'm bored with sex in our relationship.

It actually started about a year after we first had sex.. we were having sex a few times a week and then it just ... stopped. She kept saying no so many times I finally just got used to doing my own thing, which has made it even tougher to enjoy sex.

I find that in general there isn't nearly as much passion as there used to be...

Sucks, because I really do love this girl and she's an amazing girlfriend, our sex life and "passion" though are boring.
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Old 12-28-2010, 07:43 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: am bored of my sex life.. please help

Hold out... But not in that negative way... Flirt with him, tease him... Make yourself a little more desirable yet mysterious... Walk around the house in slightly more revealing clothes when you're alone with him... Sext him when away... Convince him to oil your back... ( sorry sounds chessey )... But lead him on while balancing holding him off... Then give in, just at less often than you usually do... But don't hold him at bay for weeks just days ( you don't want to seem like a total c!!k tease )... Sometimes someone has to make a bigger effort... So why not you?
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